He drives me insane. Everytime I visit him, he's practically smothering me, following me everywhere in his house. He lives with his parents. He cant cook for himself, he orders his mum around, his bedroom is a complete state, he cant eat with a knife and fork he can only use a flippin fork, he doesnt know how to use a washing machine, or how to hoover OR iron. Hes only interested in parttime work. When im back home he has to have a set time to speak to me. If i put my phone on divert just to get 5 mins to myself, he will phone my house to check if im there even though i will usually have text him to say i will speak to him later. He snores.
I cant do it. I just cant.
CommentAuthorLaticschick Holland
oh dear hun, have you sat down and talked to him?
CommentAuthormummyto2
aww hun, i dont know what to say to you, have to tried talking to him about how your feeling
im a married women now
mrs carson-moores
i love my hubby and my kids with all my heart and soul
CommentAuthorloucubitt1987
you really need to sit down and talk to him sweetie.. you really dont sound happy at all, and that isnt a place to be emotionally if you are planning marriage xx
CommentAuthorrainykins
If he drives you so crazy in the first place, and you knew what he was like why did you agree to marry him? If you are that certain you can't marry him then sit down with him and tell him straight, it may be the kick up the bottom he needs to realise what hes going to lose. Whatever your course of action hun good luck with making your decision xox
UKB Mad Scientist
Ride it like ya stole it.....
I'm a flippin ORTHOTIST
CommentAuthorSophieSweets
Thank you guys.
But its like talking to a child. I dont think he understands the enormity of it all. I mean he wants a part time job and a £5000 wedding? He's ridiculous. He cant take criticism. I cant cry, but i cant be normal either. When we split up before, I ccouldnt be without him. Nw ive got him I dont want him. Its a vixious circle. I really dont know what to do.
CommentAuthorGoff
If you dont want to be with him then you have to move on.
Is it just that you dont want to be on your own and you would rather be with him than that?
You have a decision to make - and if you choose to leave him, it will sting like feck for a couple of weeks, but you WILL get over it.
Good luck x
UKB Mad Scientist
Ride it like ya stole it.....
I'm a flippin ORTHOTIST
CommentAuthorSophieSweets
You're right, It will be difficult but it has to be done. Just when? We live 300 miles apart.
CommentAuthorlemlau
i think you know what you have to do but actually doing it is harder! sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind
xx
Live every moment
Laugh everyday
Love beyond words
Happily ever after
CommentAuthorAshlie-Louise
Like you said hunni, a £5000 is a lot of money to be spending ... make sure that in your heart your spending it on the right guy xxx
CommentAuthorGoff
300 miles apart??
Will be easier than you think then honey. And the sooner the better from the sounds of it x
UKB Mad Scientist
Ride it like ya stole it.....
I'm a flippin ORTHOTIST
CommentAuthorRachie :D
Where's the excited girl who was so in love? If this is how you really feel sweetie then don't do it. Marriage is meant to be for life and without sounding horrid but can you imagine yourself waking up to see his face every morning for the rest of your life? Is this the man you want to grow old with?
The washing machine/ ironing thing isnt a big deal as I do all that - but he does the kitchen and hoovers. But why doesnt he want full time work to support you both?
I hope you work it out sweetie xxxxxx
9th June 2012 when two worlds collide
The Crazy Cat Lady and the Transformer Man!
CommentAuthorrainykins
if i was in your position hun, id kick his backside to the kerb and move on to the future (my opinion only), if hes not prepared to compromise now, think what it will be like when you are married. I know its a difficult decision to make especially one as big involving your own wedding. And if hes that insecure now i don't think it will matter to much which way you tell him as i get the feeling from what you say he possibly won't believe you. I really hope you come to a decision that is with your heart and mind. What ever your choice good luck with it as it will not be an easy one xox
CommentAuthormrs pinkalice
if your not sure you want to be with him then marriage is definitely not the right thing at the moment.
ps. i can sympathise with the snoring part lol x
CommentAuthorMrs Turps (Nicpep)
if you love him then maybe you can work on it over time, but I really wouldnt be getting married at the moment hun
18-09-10
Now a married lady :)
Im a rebel me
CommentAuthorluvlifejen (mrs berr
i agree with all the ladies hun you do sound like you have made the decision really but you could sit down and speak to him if you want to try and make it work?? xx
soon to be Mrs Berry 26.11.2011
CommentAuthorRags
Sorry, not a good post from me and H2b, urm don't do it! His response was actually wtf is she marrying him for??
The snoring thing tho - it gets like living next to a main road or the sea, once you get into the rhythm you can't hear it (or so I'm told - nowt wakes me but h2b has gotten used to my snoring, I just can't move when I sleep or that wakes him)
I'm now a married woman
I have a gorgeous husband
Whats to do now
Theres no more wedding planning to do
CommentAuthorhaylsmccrone
sounds like you know what you have to do hun ! my h2b does the eating with only a fork thing....drives me mad, now i just give him a look and he picks up the knife, hehe
good luck xx xx
CommentAuthorSophieSweets
Some funny response that have made me smile, spesh ur h2b Rags lol.
I think my problem is hes the only person who understands me, no one else really does, and i dont see anyone else. It is almost like im just holding on for the sheer fear of being alone. Eeek i dont like this.
Plus i dont want to leave here LOL xx
CommentAuthorMrs Brakes
Sorry Hun but not good from me either. He sounds like a big spoilt child. He doesn't sound ready for marriage, far too immature. You don't sound like you want to be in the same room as him (Thank god he's 300 miles away) let alone spend the rest of your lives together. Personally, and I think I speak for a lot of ladies, I can't wait to see my man, I miss him when he's not around.If we have arranged to talk, I don't put my phone on divert! We speak on email and text even if we have just left each other.
Got married 11/11/11.
CommentAuthorSophieSweets
Thing is Eden, it used to be like that, when we first met, then he did alot of lying and messing around. So its kind of never been the same since x
CommentAuthorMrs Hinch2B
sorry to say it hun but I think the girlies are right! You need to get rid hunny if your heart isn't in it xx
Bridezilla.... Me?? I have no idea what your talking about!!
We met 30/01/2005 (H2B's Bday)
Got Engaged 23/07/2010 (My Bday)
Getting Married 08/06/2012 (can't wait to be Mrs Hinch)
CommentAuthorRachie :D
Why would you have to leave here?? Ok fair enough it may be hard with everyone else round you getting married etc but we are a community we're here for everyone plus you may have some good ideas to help others out xxx
Oh and never hold out hun its so not worth it - im so glad i got out of my 1st engagement - if i hadnt right now id be hauled up in some dingy flat waiting on the div on my knees raising 3 brats and never seeing anyone especially not my family. Instead I have a lovely home, a family I see and speak to all the time and will never be asked to give up and im happy and excited to see my gorgeous h2b when I get home. I can honestly say im so happy and so loved. I really hope you have that hun regardless of it being with him or another in the future xxxx
9th June 2012 when two worlds collide
The Crazy Cat Lady and the Transformer Man!
CommentAuthorMrs Brakes
Sounds like the love has gone. Once trust is lost it can be hard to get back and that's when you live closer to each other. You need to work out what you want from your marriage and ask him if he can deliver. x
Got married 11/11/11.
CommentAuthorSophieSweets
i know girls, but i just dont know how to do it.
He's on msn at the moment and ive been ratty with him all day, (through lack of sleep, not relationship related) and he hasnt said anything to me since ive been on.
I look at all you guys and im so envious (but happy) for what you guys have. I'm nearly 26 and feel like i shouldve done so much more and I feel like im never going to meet the one for me.
CommentAuthorMrs Brakes
I think you already know what the answer is though.
Got married 11/11/11.
CommentAuthorMrs Brakes
Hey, don't think like that. 10 years ago I was engaged to an ar5e. He lied, cheated, stole. I spent 8 years by myself because of the effect him and his family had on my son. Then, out of the blue, I met Kieran. The right one will come along when you are ready. As Diana Ross sang - You can't hurry love!
Got married 11/11/11.
CommentAuthorRachie :D
Im 26 and so is my best mate. She was with her boyfriend for 8 years and they never moved in together etc. She felt that she had wasted those 8 years. She has been single for nr 2 years now and is so happy. She's single and enjoying herself and still looks forward to the day I will be returning the favour and honour of being her CB but until then she's content just to be her as for 8 years she was a couple. She does get lonely from time to time but knows Mr Right is there for her and if she's patient she will have the most amazing future with the best man possible xxxxx
9th June 2012 when two worlds collide
The Crazy Cat Lady and the Transformer Man!
CommentAuthorSophieSweets
i think i need to sleep on it then deal with it tomorrow. then its telling family and friends. they will think im a fool.
CommentAuthorRachie :D
No they will support you and help you as they love you - hope you sort it out hunni xxxx
9th June 2012 when two worlds collide
The Crazy Cat Lady and the Transformer Man!
CommentAuthorMrs Brakes
Who cares what they think, they're 300 miles away!
Got married 11/11/11.
CommentAuthorMrs Hinch2B
my friend is 38 and she has just got engaged she only met her h2b six months ago xx
Bridezilla.... Me?? I have no idea what your talking about!!
We met 30/01/2005 (H2B's Bday)
Got Engaged 23/07/2010 (My Bday)
Getting Married 08/06/2012 (can't wait to be Mrs Hinch)
CommentAuthorMrs Brakes
Anyone with half an eye can see it's not really what you want.Your family / friends will be fine
Got married 11/11/11.
CommentAuthorSophieSweets
thank you so much, my lovelies. I wish i could cry. but i cant.
CommentAuthorRachie :D
Huge hugs xxx
9th June 2012 when two worlds collide
The Crazy Cat Lady and the Transformer Man!
CommentAuthorRach (Mrs H)...
ive just seen this post petal, and i just want to say you have to follow your heart....but your head has to nod in agreement too......if you are having these problems now it wont be resolved by just getting married. It may sound scary been on your own but better that than been in an unhappy relationship and dont leave here if you want to stay, its for everyone i think.... good luck, thinking of you x x x x
CommentAuthornickers
hi hun well there is not much more i can say than what the other ladies have said huge hugs xxxxx
MRS RICHARDSON HERE
LOVE MY LITTLE FAMILY MY GORGEOUS SON
AND HANDSOME HUSBAND XXXX
CommentAuthorSophieSweets
Rach uve set me off lol. Am feling the squeeze of these hugs, mind lol x
CommentAuthorRach (Mrs H)...
oh god sorry flower, i was just thinking of you, no one can make the decision except you, which is why i said follow your heart, we are all sending you cyber cuddles x x x x
CommentAuthorSophieSweets
no its ok, honestly. i really appreciate all of your advice. Everyone is so lovely.
CommentAuthorsarahwasabride
good luck what ever u decide to do xxx
CommentAuthorSophieSweets
thank you i really do appreciate all the kind thoughts :) x
CommentAuthorclareabella
well hun i think ur on a merry go round and u cant get off and ur head is else where basically i have alwways said u never know a person ever not even when u have lived with them years and my h2b can do everything as he lived on his own be 4 i invaded his life and took over lol but theres some 1 out there 4 every 1 hun good luck
ooooo muchly love my mr c fletcher
CommentAuthorSophieSweets
LOL thanks Clare, i think i know what i have to do, will keep y'all posted...
CommentAuthorclareabella
ok hun chin up and keep possative hun ull b ok
ooooo muchly love my mr c fletcher
CommentAuthorXLittleMissMe!X
Its amazing what getting married does for you. I nearly did it a few years ago and it made me face up to what I was doing and the fact that I wasn't happy. I walked away a couple of months before we were due to get married as I knew if I did go ahead then I would regret it. (needless to say gut instinct was right) I'm 30 now and will be 31 when I get married but I know its right this time. There are no doubts in my head and no reason for me to question anything. If you are thinking like this now then I would say that you are better not only to call it off but move on altogether. Age is nothing so don't worry about that or what your friends are doing there are loads of us that are older and getting married for the first time. Do what is right by you and you only. If you don't you will make your life a misery and will regret it. Sometimes you have to face up to the reality and do something harsh in order to find happiness. You will find what you are looking for so don't worry. x x
CommentAuthorwelshcerys
Sophie hun it's much better to be happy on your own than unhappy in a relationship. You will only resent him more and more and that's not good for anyone.
You will make the right decision for you (even though it might not feel right at the time). All the best chick x
CommentAuthorLaticschick Holland
What ever you choose hun im sure your family will respect it and support you! Its not nice to be in this position but follow your heart. don't regret what is meant to be the happiest day of your life. Your meant to do it once don't make it be the wrong choice. Dont worry about not coming on here, fine its a wedding forum but you can come on and chat and have a laugh. People who have got married ages ago are on here still and people who aren't getting married for 3 years etc are on. Its a forum to make friends etc we won't kick you out
CommentAuthormummyto2
sending you big hugs i hope you make the right choice for YOU
im a married women now
mrs carson-moores
i love my hubby and my kids with all my heart and soul
