So I'm having a family drama at the moment. Basically my parents divorced 13-14 years ago and I do not get along with my dad at all. Once he caught wind of the wedding, he turned up at our home unannounced shouting and raving about how he should be involved and what has he ever done to hurt me?
I won't go into detail but the issue is I want my brother to walk me down the aisle. He may be younger than me but he has been more of a rock for me than my dad ever has. If my dad were to attend the wedding but not in a "father of the bride" role and just a guest would that be wrong? Also interested to hear of any alternatives to dads walking their daughters down the aisle :)
Our perfect day - 08.08.15
CommentAuthorRachelE118
Hi MrsKirby2b. I'm in my 40's, and lost my dad a few years ago so my lovely 16 year old son is giving me away. And stick to your guns if you want your brother to give you away then go for it. Good luck xx
CommentAuthorKellieT
Hi. It's your wedding day. Do what makes you happy. My sister didn't invite our dad to her wedding at all, it caused a bit of a stir but she didn't let that change her mind. And I will not be walking down the aisle with him, I'll just be going down with my bridesmaids. I would rather be happy on my big day rather than do what everyone else thinks is right. Xx
CommentAuthorWhovianbride
Im the same as you hun, My dad is a lay about , good for nothing loser. I cut ties with him for good when I told him I was pregnant and his responce was "well I don't have to pay for it" when he never even paid for me. I have not talked to him since and my daughter is now 2&1/2. Hes not even invited to my wedding.
My mum will be walking me down the aisle and "giving me away" , shes always been there for me and has never been any questions of anyone else doing it. she is my constant.
Met June 2009 on my Birthday,Met again July 2009 and got
together, May 2010 Moved in,Jan 2011 got pregnant,
August 2011 Got our own place, 2011 Had our Baby Girl,
Dec 2011 Got engaged, July 2015 Getting married! Yay!
CommentAuthorVictoriaL46
In the same boat, my dad and I had a major falling out several weeks after his wedding to my stepmother. Suffice to say even though they are now divorced things haven't changed and he and I haven't spoken in nearly 5 years. My brother insists my dad should be invited to my wedding next year and walk me down the aisle as tradition states but I have put my foot firmly down on this. He will not be coming to the wedding.
My best friend who is very much a sister in all but blood will be walking me down the aisle as she is the only person ,other than my H2B, who has been there for me when I needed someone the most and I love her to the moon and back.
Stick to your guns and if your dad doesn't like it then he doesn't have to come. You need people around you who loves you, has always been there for you and is worth giving you (something precious to them) to someone they trust.
Met in Nov 2005
Engaged 13th June 2013
Becomes Mrs Stewart on 10th Aug 2015 Honeymoon in Florida!
My Diary Thread: My Alice in Wonderland Wedding Diary
I haven't seen or spoken to my dad in at least 9 years, he hasn't cared for any of his children from any marriage. I have a step-dad but we don't get on either as he is a violent man and I stood up to him so he doesn't like that. He is paying for the dress but that is it, they couldn't even afford the deposit so I had to pay it. He gets what he wants whether they have the money or not! So for me, I am having my granddad walk me down the aisle. I am a big granddads girl and he has always been there for me throughout my life no questions asked! He even paid for my 21st birthday party and wouldn't let me pay for it. He is very dear to me and he will be wearing his kilt too. I am going to ask him when we all visit Harry Potter studios as we are all BIG fans, and hand him 'grandfather of the bride' cuff links to wear on the day :) Hes a blubber and very emotional as we all are, so its definitely not an over the phone jobby! (I live in wales, him on the Isle of Wight!)
CommentAuthor*KelBel*
I think you should have who you want. I'm going traditional but we've not had any major issues in the family. Of course you should choose the person that's been there to support you, x
Velcro...my wedding day twinny! The Two Kel's!
Got engaged 14/10/12 in Central Park NYC!
Became Mrs Macdonald 13th September 2014
Mummy to 4 girlies and baby blue boy Due 10/05/2016
CommentAuthorJoannaS
my youngest son gave me away as my dad died many years ago and my mum is also dead had he not then I would have asked my cousin my eldest didn't want to do it when he was asked. I say choose who you want xxx
CommentAuthorFranM76
My dad died a few years ago. I initially asked my eldest son to give me away (he'll be 16 in October) but he was a bit unsure and doesn't like a lot of attention. I told him that I won't be offended if he doesn't want to - the fact he's there is enough for me to be happy. So he politely declined and I've asked my Uncle - who nearly cried with joy at being asked!!! He's always been close to us and was like a best mate to my dad when he was alive. My mum was chuffed to bits and said "your dad would be very pleased with your choice" which made me a very happy bunny xx
CommentAuthorAprilS61
Have who you want, tradition doesn't matter. Make your own tradition and have whatever will make you happy :)
Mr & Mrs Swan 04/04/15
CommentAuthorDonnaH39
My little brother is giving me away, my dad died when I was 3, when I was growing up I was told because of that it should be my uncle that gave me away when I got married-but my brother has been there for me and I wouldn't want anyone else to give me away
CommentAuthorShowgirl
My relationship with my Dad has been rather strained since my parents got divorced about 13 years ago (we didn't talk at all for several years) but I've always been crazy close with my Grandad so he'll be giving me away and my Dad will be there as a guest.
CommentAuthorJoD96
I'm hoping that my dad will be able to walk me down the isle (he has problems with his leg circulation) but if he's unable to my son will walk me down to my dad so he can officially give me away
CommentAuthorMrsManiatt
It's up to you, Dad is giving me away but I'm lucky enough to have my parents still together. Do what makes YOU happy - not anyone else! xxx
CommentAuthoralmost a year wife!!
It's up to you Hun, some brides have their sons or a close male relative. I've seem brides walk alone and I've seem bride and groom walk down the aisle together, which was lovely actually as it was like here we are, we're together and let Do this! I had my dad because that's what I wanted. Xx
Ill marry my hero
CommentAuthorInDreamland
My dad walked me down the aisle as is traditional but I am a daddy's girl (sorry mum, I love you too) so he and I both would have it no other way.
However, when my SIL got married she didn't even want to invite my FIL as her relationship with him is terrible and only includes him in major family events because she has to but otherwise doesn't really make any effort with him. My hubby walked her down the aisle and did the FOB speech, he's a younger brother.
Have who you feel is right and you want to give you away x
Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!
CommentAuthorInDreamland
To add to that, he got an invite and was just like any other regular guest, not sat at the top table. Like I said though she only invited him because she had to.
Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!
CommentAuthorErinV
I'm having my dad walk me down the aisle and he would not have it any other way ;)
CommentAuthorElinor Claire
My dad will be doing it as is traditional, but I'm lucky enough that my parents are together. I knew someone who had her little nephew do it because her father was in a wheelchair and the aisle wasn't wide enough for her to walk next to him.
30th August 2014 was the best birthday ever.
It was the day that I became Mrs. Dixon.
CommentAuthorclairenina
I was initially going to walk on my own, but I have put down on the paperwork for the registrar my half brother. There's still a chance he won't turn up, as I can't rely on my family. So either I walk with him, or on my own
CommentAuthorMillieT
I haven't spoken to my real father for about 10 years, but very luckily, I have a step father who means more then the world to me. So he is taking full father of the bride responsibility.If he wasn't in my life, then it would be my brother. Its about what makes YOU happy, no one else, and don't let anyone else tell you otherwise. He should be grateful that you are even considering inviting him xxx
CommentAuthorJennK
Thanks ladies, I hadn't considered walking down on my own so that's something to think about.
My dad has since been emailing my h2b trying to get him onside, which has just made me more angry with him, he is still not invited at all!
Our perfect day - 08.08.15
CommentAuthorcasbride87
Im having my mum walk me down the aisle, as i lost my dad four years ago this July, i couldnt dream of having anyone else but my mum do it, I love her to bits.
You have to have someone like your brother who has been a big part of your life, sod tradition, make your own.
xxxx
CommentAuthorVictoriaL46
I agree with Cas, tradition can take a hike. If you want your brother or even to walk down on your own then do it.
Alternatively (and I have only ever seen this done once and it was very romantic) The bride and groom did a first look before the wedding and they walked in together hand in hand. He got to see her first and they even kept us waiting a little bit so he could compose himself (shhh I didn't tell you that ;) ) There was only one bridesmaid and best man and they escorted each other in first arm-in-arm before the bride and groom. Just a thought. I thought about it for mine but my OH is very much wanting to wait down the aisle.
Met in Nov 2005
Engaged 13th June 2013
Becomes Mrs Stewart on 10th Aug 2015 Honeymoon in Florida!
My Diary Thread: My Alice in Wonderland Wedding Diary
CommentAuthorMagpieBride
I've always thought the bride's "half" of the wedding party is entirely her choice, as the groom's is his, and goes double for who walks with you!
Personally, my dad's walking me; he was delighted and could barely speak when I asked, since a few years ago and just as we were getting back in regular contact and repairing bridges he had to talk to my mum about some issues with my younger sis' behaviour at school and she got really mad at him and threw out how she saw the divorce as him signing away all rights to us girls and that when the paperwork came through she arranged that if and when I got married my brother-in-law would be giving me away... without consulting me and with no guarantee they'd even be able to make it anyway! (Ugh, rage; breeeeeeathe...) I've always been closer to my dad than my mum, if there'd been any possibility when they divorced I would have stayed with him, and he feels bad for being so distant at first, so reconnecting and having him give me away is the best thing in the world, and I definitely feel that if my mum can't cope with that then she's not welcome - especially since my step-dad is effectively taking the place of MOB anyway!
CommentAuthorJennK
Still having drama with this, I still do not want my dad there at all. He would cause drama and upset and I can't even bear to think about having to include him in the photos right now. I would be happier without him there, but what if he turns up anyway?!
Our perfect day - 08.08.15
CommentAuthorBev
Have who ever you want walking you down the aisle hun. My dad passed away last year so my brother is taking on 'dad duties' on the day xx
CommentAuthorAmandaK74
My father passed away 10 years ago so sadly he won't be the one walking me down the Isle, but im sure he will be there in spirit. My 17 year old son has kindly took on the role, im very honoured and proud of him
met 11th December 2010
engaged 2nd August 2013
getting married to the love of my life 11th july 2015
CommentAuthorMrs T Hurley!
I've been thinking about this a lot and we've decided to walk down the aisle together. I was going to have my nan, who has been my rock but she is very frail now and she might not be able to come now. I don't wanna walk it by myself but there's no one else who I'd want to walk me down except us together.
Therefore, I'd say do it your way. Its your day, not anyone else's. You only get to do this once (hopefully!) x
Met 18/09/03
Engaged 06/09/08
Getting married 05/09/17
