BRIDESMAIDS i chose my bridesmaids very carefully and with great thought, i picked my nearest and dearest friends and thought they would support me and be excited throughout the whole wedding experience. well thats what i thought, after nearly 6 months of not even a txt asking about wedding plans or even any interest in my life, i am really regreting asked 2 of my bridesmaids to be part of my big day ! one of them lives in leeds, me and my other bridesmaid use to go down and see her about once a month, but i havent been down for months, as i started a new job so couldnt make it a few times so now, my bridesmaid has been going down there without me and then posting it on fb without even asking me if i wanna go now . i understand that they are best friends and have a closer relationship with each other but i thought they would want to keep me in the loop. they have been really snotty about my hen doo too !they asked to arrange my hen doo and they were more than happy to do it, so i gave them a list of friends that i would like to invite, then last month i was getting txts off people saying what was happening with the hen doo !! and even my moh had no idea what was happening about it, then they gave us dates when it was gonna be, but me and moh couldnt make it ....?? so i told them i would arrange it instead as i couldnt do there plans........ so now there even worse !!! i'm thinking about sacking them ........ come on girlies i need some advice !
CommentAuthormummy2Olivia_Lisa
sorry hunny but id sack em!!!
u need people around u who can support u not hinder u, ask moh to arrange ya hen do n sack off the other bm's,
x x x if u feel bad just doin that straight away give em a chance.......... contact em and explain if they arnt bothered about the bm position can they let you know as you have others who would very much like to fill the role, see wot they say back x xx
6 n a half weeks scan!!!!!! x x x
CommentAuthorMilly87
I dont know if i have much advice but im in a similar situation. i asked a friend of mine but then regretted it very quickly. she hardly ever talks to me (we used to see each other all the time when i lived down south) and seems resentful to come to the dress fittings. i really dont know if i could sack her coz im too nice to people!!
my mum said to me that i should ask her if she still wants to be a BM coz if its too much hassle coming up all the time maybe she would just like to come to the wedding as a guest but i think i would just feel so awkward. maybe just get them all together and discuss things and have an informal meeting and get everything of your chest but do it in a group with your other BM to avoid a finger-pointing argument.
Good luck x
CommentAuthormitch2509
ok my moh also suggest that we go on holiday to spain for a long weekend in june as ive been poorly and need to relax for a bit, and do a pre hen weekend ! i txted my bridesmaids and asked if they wanted to come and have a girly weekend before the wedding.... after an hour of nothing both bridesmaids txted back at the same time, saying why did i want this now, as they had already organised this and i didnt want it so they had to cancel it!! i was like i didnt know you had arranged this anyways and ive just decided now to get away, then they said they might be able to come, so i txt them tonight and asked if they were able to come, i got a txt back off one saying..." nope wont be going soz "! im so anoyed and upset now i just want to call them selfish cows!!!!!
CommentAuthorKat
I know its not much help but I would sack them. You don't need it. I know weddings can be stressful for everyone but if they weren't willing to do their bit with smiles on their faces they should have said no to being BM's
It sounds as though their interests and desires are their priorites rather than yours! I most definately would not be impressed! As I have said elsewhere they should be honoured to be asked to be your bm and not be taking the mick!
CommentAuthormitch2509
thats how i feel, i feel like im paying them to come to my wedding by giving them nice dresses etc, and getting nothing in return
CommentAuthorKat
Are there other people who would be honoured and grateful for the opportunity to be your BM?
CommentAuthormitch2509
i think there is! i just dont know what to do ?
CommentAuthorAtaraxia
I would sack them to be honest. I sacked one of my BMs for similar reasons and haven't regretted it!
Got married 27th June and blessed on July 5th 2012
Finally Mrs M :3
Love, love... Here we are.
CommentAuthorKat
Talk to them honestly. Tell them how your feeling and that you are willing to admit it might be pre wedding stress getting to you but it is their job to calm you, not to add to that stress. Say you want them as BM's but need supportive ones so can't have them if they don't start being their for you
CommentAuthorkrisw86
sorry hun, but i would explain to them how their behaviour is making u feel. and if the attitude is still clearly there then i'd asking them to stand down because u want supportive friends to help u with this planning. not 2 girls that sounds like spoilt brats and look down their noses at everyone (just my opinion hun) xxx
CommentAuthorFreyFreyMrs.Carney2B
I agree - have a chat to them about their behaviour and ask if they still wanna do it - they may back out which would save you the trouble and if not you have grounds to rein them in abit!
CommentAuthorHonest John!
I would tell them situation has changed and they have to contribute towards their outfits etc and give them the chance to not be BM. If they are committed they will step up, if not they walk so it is a win win situation
CommentAuthormitch2509
thanks ladies.... and john
CommentAuthorNishaVyas88
Sack 'em, I say. They're obviously not doing a very good job.
CommentAuthorxbeckix88
Id try talking to them first but if things dont improve sack them!!
CommentAuthorMrsTacky2B
i would have a heart to heart with them explaining how you are feeling and what is expected of them, then i would give them the choice if they want to be part of your day. Sometimes people say they want to be part of it but are not wanting to commit to it. I am very lucky and have my best friend and my oldest goddaughter and they are so loving all of it. My goddaughter has been dragged to every wedding fair/shop and even had a big smile when i showed her the most god awful 80's brown bridesmaid dresses and said she liked them bless her.
Good luck and remember they need to be your rocks as you need them to support you.
My biggest dream is to marry my Best Friend and I can't wait
to be Mrs Herbert Whoop Whoop !!!!
CommentAuthorKaya
I'd sack them - mine is getting the boot tonight!
Now Mrs Cobb!!!!!! :-D
CommentAuthorcam
That's what a true bridesmaid should be @leahHopwood! Great support even when they don't like it shouldn't show it!
Can't wait till March 31st 2012
To marry my gentle man with a heart like my own
God's gift to help me in life
CommentAuthormitch2509
im going to the pub with one of them tonight ! so i think im gonna have a little chat with her ....
CommentAuthormjb87
good luck hun, I hope it work out for you xx
CommentAuthormandymoo
i'd sack them hun! you want people who are going to support you on your big day and in the run up and if they are failing already.... time to get shot! x
CommentAuthorEmsy5000
I would sack them as well if they are not going to use their heads and take an intrest you don't want them
Dyslexic
its spelt wrong
I No! I Now! I Know!!!!!
I am NOW MRS LONSDALE!!
CommentAuthorRachie :D
Sack them! Me, Jill and Em will do the job for you :)
9th June 2012 when two worlds collide
The Crazy Cat Lady and the Transformer Man!
CommentAuthorKylee27
Have to agree with the rest of the girls...sack them!
Can't wait to be married!
CommentAuthormitch2509
ok i meet with my bridesmaid last night and she seemed really excited about the wedding and was asking loads of questions and taking a real interest, which makes me feel so much better, she even offered to pay for her dress if i was struggling with money, i feel much better about it now,and she even said she would help me with anything i wanted with the wedding, i think she just felt lost as she didnt have any jobs or bridesmaid things todo, so i think i might give her a job so shes more involved. and she said she would do what ever i wanted for the hen doo, and she would make sure it would be fun!
