since me and my h2bs stepdad have fallen out (he is horrible to me, manipulative and lies so i stood up to him) the family have been quite awkward. i feel very uncomfortable going round there with h2b and our kids so i try to avoid it. i have tried to invlove h2bs mom with the wedding and she has offered to pay for the cake and her daughters dress (shes 17 and going to be one of our bridesmaids).
We ended up finding dresses for £12 but it turned out that my maid of honour needed a different dress (which i decided was ok as the other two were matching). all was fine up until last week when my sister (my other bridesmaid) announced shes pregnant. she will have a bump by the time the wedding comes and i dont want all 3 bridesmaids in different dresses, that would look silly. so i asked all 3 bridesmaids if they would mind having new dresses so they all match, and if theyd mind paying no more than £35 each towards them. my sister and moh said that was fine, no problem. other bridesmaid (h2bs sister) didnt txt back.
h2b went round his mums yesterday and was told that they shall NOT be giving any money for a new dress as its not their fault my sister got pregnant. they apparantly cant "afford it" even thought they have just bought a brand new caravan and been on holiday in a grand a night hotel! h2bs mum also said that if the sister has to change her dress then she wont be a bridesmaid!
i am so mad! they are so selfish! they never offer us any financial help and they are loaded! they always tell us theyr skint, then fork out money on cars and holidays. i feel like telling them to f*ck off and not have the sister as a bridesmaid! i wouldnt mind if the original dress had cost loads but it was £12 for god sake! what should i do? i reallly dont kno what to say to them. sorry for long rant! x
CommentAuthorohfiddles
i cant be of anyhelp im afraid hunny, but i am so sorry they are stressing you out xxx
CommentAuthorKerrylou
Could MOH and your sister have matching styles but keep SIL2b in the original dress? - keeps the peace and it wouldn't look too out of place. Does this girl have a part time job, that way SHE can pay for the dress.
I hear what you're saying about the outlaws, I know myself how frustrating it is when you get told "we don't have any money" yet you see money getting spent like water. Sadly there's nothing you can do about it so you've got to grit your teeth and get on with it! I see where the darling old bat is coming from, no, it's NOT their fault your sister got pregnant and if that's going to cause them more expense...........it's a tricky one. I must say though that her delivery of this was bang out of order!
I wouldn't say anything to them, I'd deal with your SIL2b as it's her that is bridesmaid. If she can't afford the dress herself and you can't squeeze it into your budget then you may have to think about asking her to step down!
It's right what they say
"The course of true love never runs smoothly"
But if it had been easy then we wouldn't love each other as
much as we do right now - 1 week to go :D
CommentAuthorbridetobe1990
i think they are being very selfish and pathetic. i am having 6 bridesmaids and 2 flower girls. one is my H2Bs sister and one is my sister they are all having matching dresses which they have chosen between them all with my approval and are each paying £82. and my MIL is more than happy to pay for the dress. last year i was a bridesmaid for my friend and i paid £175 if you have found dresses you are all happy with for £35 stand your ground it is your big day dont let them tell you what you can and cant have. my friends MIL ended up taking over her wedding in the end and she had no say in what was what and none of her own family turned up i was the only one on the brides side. if you know when you will be getting them they could put a little bit away wont take long to save up £35
CommentAuthorx~Hails~x
Id ask her to step down then if im honest! Yes this might cause problems but if you want them in the same dress and they refuse to get another one then thats the only thing to do. Unless you can find the extra in your budget somewhere?? Im having 5 bridesmaids in 3 different dresses as the age gaps (3,8,11,15 and 16) are a bit akward to put them all in the same one, might be 2 different ones not decided yet lol
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Ask her to step down. Its YOUR wedding and you have what you want. Its not about keeping the peace or other people happy. If they wont try and sort it then ask her to step down.
UKB Mad Scientist
Ride it like ya stole it.....
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CommentAuthorKelley
stick to your guns! its your wedding xxx
CommentAuthorSuzi
I would ask her to step down as well... Tell her your sorry (the BM NOT the mother) but you can not afford to buy her a new dress! I bet you anything you like the mother ends up paying for her dress as she wont want her daughter left out! It is YOUR wedding, she has no right to dictate to you what your BM's will be wearing! Tell her to go do one hun!!
Do not disturb... Already disturbed enough!
CommentAuthorDrunchPunk
Yeah, couldn't agree more - if they're going to say 'well it's that dress or nothing', then it's nothing. You'll have to tell her you can't afford to dress all three bridesmaids, and since the other two will pay then you're sorry, but there's nothing you can do.
