Wedding Forum - Bridesmaid Problem - Page 1

Wedding Forum - Bridesmaid Problem...

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The Big Day > Hen Nights: Bridesmaid Problem

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- CommentAuthorRachaelC84
I have a really big problem, my bridesmaid doesn't have much money. We have decided to go to London to see a show and stay over. My bridesmaid has toldme she can't attend my hen party. My other bridesmaids are young and won't be coming. She is my cheif bridesmaid and would like her to be there.

I have offered to pay for her but she has said she doesn't want to appear as a scrounger and she won't be bothered if we go without her.

How can I make her see that it is important her been there with us.
- CommentAuthormrsV2013
Tell her you won't go with out her. Make her think you've canceled. Might work might not. Depends if you feel guilty doing tho :/

hicory vicary dock i will be mrs rachel vicary :)
- CommentAuthorRachaelC84
Yeh I told her we won't be going without you but don't think she is having any of it.xx
- CommentAuthormrsV2013
Oh no :(

hicory vicary dock i will be mrs rachel vicary :)
- CommentAuthorJennyHeather
I would say I'm not having my hen do without her, just make it adament, no one even needs to know that you've paid for her either!!

- CommentAuthorsarah
Could you change your hen night to something that everyone can attend?
- CommentAuthorRachaelC84
She is totally skirt and can't afford anything.
- CommentAuthorGillianE
difficult situation really, why not have a hen night in, have a pamper night, games night, or something else similar that way everyone can come and no one needs to have loads of money. Put some party food on as well.

xx
- CommentAuthorsarah
Good idea Gillian, you've put into words exactly what I was thinking.
- CommentAuthorKistHall
Maybe tell her that you paying for her to go to is your way of saying thank you for all the help she's giving you. That way maybe seh'll feel its more of a fair deal instead of her scrounging. She's clearly sensitive about borrowing money so just have to make her feel more comfortable and not like you're giving her charity or something, for some people its a real pride things. Otherwise the idea of a cheaper night might be best!
- CommentAuthorVelcro
tell her it's her thank you gift and that no one needs to know if that's what she wants

Also a night in as suggested would be a good plan, get the girls in onsies and get loads of face masks and pampery stuff from the quid shop, a few bottles of wine and some party games

Wibbly wobbly, timey wimey
*Kelbel* is my wedding twinny!
- CommentAuthorAmyK
Give her the trip as a birthday present for this year, perhaps? Even say its joint birthday/Christmas/any excuse for a gift you an think of, for her! x
- CommentAuthoralmost a year wife!!
Tbh if you want her their that badly change your plans or do something separate with like a film n pizza and a bit of a girlie night.... Dont pressure her though because she probly already feels $h!t by not going... Having no money is awful and if she can't go you're just gonna have to accept it and be an understanding friend x

Ill marry my hero
- CommentAuthorShirleygirly
She probably wouldn't enjoy herself knowing that someone else had paid for it. You might be better having a little local thing so that she can still be there but not feel like a charity case. One of my close friends isn't coming to my hen do because she can't afford it, I offered to pay for her but she got quite upset and said she would feel really uncomfortable with that and would be conscious of it all weekend. I can understand how she feels so I've said we'll do a night out around the local pubs just so that she can feel a part of it and I get to have my good mate involved. I know it means alot to you but as long as you have others around you it'll still be a fun weekend. I wouldn't make her feel worse by saying how much it means to you.

I can't wait until 29/06/2013
The day I marry the man of my dreams!

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