Hi all! Please excuse me venting on here now but I'm feeling a bit grr!
Me and H2B are not having a gift list but instead we are asking for money to put towards our honeymoon in the new year (that's if they want to. It's completely optional). Now H2B's uncle lives in germany and asked H2B's mother what we would like for a gift but she said to us that she feels uncomfortable just saying money. Me and H2B had a talk about whats best to tell her to say when we came up with the idea of putting a little letter in with the invitation saying how instead of a guest list we would like contributions to the honeymoon. I rang MIL2B to say that she needn't worry coz we were going to do this. She then proceeded to leave a message on my answerphone a mintue later to say how she wasn't happy and not to put a letter in the invitation to her brother and that she doesn't like the fact that we are asking for money for the honeymoon anyway. She did point out that he is flying in for the wedding and having to rent a car and everything (which we DO appreciate!) and doesn't feel that he should be asked for money. I am perfectly happy not to recieve anything, it doesn't phaze me in the slightest but she is insisting that we ask for something. Now me and h2b have lived together for 2 years and have everything we need so we feel that asking for something other than honeymoney is wasteful. I just don't understand her reasoning of how he is spending lots of money to come so he should be asked to buy a gift and not money... now how is he going to pay for this gift? WITH MONEY.
I'm just really gutted because we have had hard times with her before but lately things have been good and we have been getting along nicely and now this has happened. Also there are more of her family coming (obviously) who have not asked and will probably ask once the invitation has been recieved (if we don't send the letter which we are having second thoughts about) so what is she gonna tell all of them? Am I being a B**ch?

hahaa teaspoons always go missing in my house too! It's a bit annoying because I just think that it is our day and this is what we really want. We can't really afford to go on honeymoon just paying by ourselves and it's what we really want. I think as long as we do it in a tactful way no one would get offended :S I have told the people that I see quite regularly already that this is what we are asking for and no one has had a problem with it so I can't see what the problem is. We thought h2b's uncle would be thankful he doesn't need to lug something over anyway. I just wish we could sit down with her and have a frank discussion about this but I know it will just end up as an argument! I feel bad for h2b coz he does anything for a quiet life but there's always something for her to moan about when it comes to us!

pERSONALLY i THINK ITS OUR PARENTS GENERATION LOL AS IT WASNT THE DONE THING THEN.
iTS ALL THE RANGE NOWADAYS HUNNI SO GO FOR IT.............THERES A FEW THREADS ON HERE WITH GIFT POEMS IF YOU NEED ANY IDEAS. SO JUST USE THE SEARCH AND YOU SHOULD FIND SOME GREAT ONES (IF YOU CANT FIND ANY GIVE ME A SHOUT AND I'LL BUMP SOME UP FOR YOU)



ops just relised i was shouting.......sorry!

we are also asking for cash towards honeymoon and i found some really nice small cards from the bay of e with lovely poems in which we are putting in with our invites :)

We haven’t got a wedding list,
The reasons we’ll explain
It’s to save you all the hassle
As shopping is a pain.

We thought we’d ask you all,
For something else instead
A small contribution towards,
A holiday in the med.

So if you’d like to contribute
Towards our honeymoon,
We offer you our heartfelt “Thanks!”
With love,


the Bride & Groom.


We know it's not traditional
It's not the way it's done
Instead of wedding presents
we'd like a bit of fun
Please don’t think we’re rude
please don’t take offence
We do not want to upset you
that's not the way it's meant
We've lived together for a while
and all the bills are paid
We've got our plates, our pots and pans
our bed is already made
So if you'd like to give a gift
to help us celebrate
Some money to enjoy ourselves
we would appreciate

For a couple of years we’ve lived in sin,
we have a toaster, a kettle and a stainless steel bin,
saucepans and towels we have many,
corkscrews and flannels we don’t need any,
we just want you with us to celebrate our day,
but if you insist on a gift anyway,
What we’d really like is a gift of money,
we hope you don’t think we’re being funny!
We’ll put it all together and buy something that’s best,
as a reminder of our day and our wonderful guests!

Because at first we lived in sin
We’ve got the sheets and a rubbish bin
A gift from you would be swell
But we’d prefer a donation to our Wishing Well!

hope these help xx

Same issues hon, we wanted money but people seem to want to give us gifts, I think it's because people know you can see how much they spend, could you ask for holiday vouchers instead? We are thinking we may have to have a list and ask for money, we want a deposit for a house and it would be so much more useful than new stuff to replace the old stuff we already have, I honestly don't really want for anything except a house of our own! x

Thanks btw for all your ideas x

we are doing the same as hails having a small gifts list as well as asking for money towards honeymoon .....as you say that way people can choose what they want to give if anything