I'm sat here this evening. Almost in tears. As much as I'm looking forward to marrying my man, I can't help but think something's missing. I lost my Dad 7months ago today, and worse is, he never met George. We talked about him, and Dad kept saying that he's exactly what I need etc ... I would give ANYTHING to have my dad there to walk me down the aisle, or just one more dance ..
CommentAuthorCarolanneJune
hiya i lost my dad this feb just gone, and feel very sad about it and the fact that he wont be there for me but there is nothing i cn do to change that now so i have got to remember to have the best time that i can on my big day and not to be sad because that is not what he would have wanted xxx all the best xx
CommentAuthorNicci
awwwww its awful isnt it :( I lost my dad when i was 15 and ever since we started planning the wedding i just want to cry :( When i walk down the isle im going to walk to the song he used to sing to me as a baby "you'll never walk alone" which i think will suit the entrance just great :) x
CommentAuthorVx Debz xV
Yeah thats the kind of thing my Dad would've said, Have a massive party and a few drinks, no tears.. Thank you, .. take care xx
CommentAuthorVx Debz xV
Nicci, I'm trying to think of a song, but can't and am struggling to get my brother to agree to take on the role as his GF hates me, so I can only talk to him when she's not there.
Thats a real shame. Im going to be brave and walk on my own, im an only child and my mother also passed when i was 6 so ive always been on my own to be honest x
CommentAuthorden1se
aw thats not good having to speak to your brother when she's not around. my dad died in 89 and i had mum walk me down the aisle at my 1st wedding and in the speeches i wanted to say something. my ex husbands grandad had died same day we got married, the year before (we didnt realise at the time of booking it) and i just said thanks for coming but for a few of us i just wanted to raise their glasses for absent friends. well there wasnt a dry tear in the house and for everyone who is was meant for, all said it was such a fantastic thing to say. maybe if you cant find a song then maybe make a special mention of him. i know its not to everyone's taste but maybe releasing doves in his memory? hope you get it sorted whatever you decide but i'm sure your dad would be very proud of you with your choice x
CommentAuthorHoxxyhula
I know what you all mean - I'm so excited about my wedding but it also reminds me that my mum isn't here and so makes me sad too. A real mix of emotions that sometimes I find a bit overwhelming. I completely know what you guys mean when you say it's very strange to think that someone who was so important to you has not met the person you are marrying.
My brother said something very simple along the lines of wishing they could have met because they shared some characteristics like kindness etc etc. It was very touching. Maybe something like that? xx
CommentAuthorVx Debz xV
My mother and I have very little contact, and an extremely strained relationship. I want her there but just as a guest, I don't see why she should "play mum" ... I know my matron of honour will say something about Dad, and as it's the day before Father's day, we're going to stop the music and have a toast at midnight to all the dad's. H2B is so muc like my dad it's quite scary, lol, obviously not looks wise, (that'd just be wrong) .. Den I thought about doves, but my dad and I both have a thing about flying birds, but my matron of honour suggested maybe we could get a clear or white balloon with a big red rose inside, filled with Helium to let go of once a picture has been taken.. (Dad was a typical English gent and a massive fan of England Rugby, which is why we thought of the rose) Sorry to put downers on, I think it's just today, cos it's 7months today, and sometimes I feel like it's yesterday, then I look back and have been through so much, that I'd love to share with him, he'd have got me through a lot easier! xx
CommentAuthormrsquinn2b
Bless you Debz, i filled up when i read your post!! i am sure your dad will be looking down on you and will be there with you in a special way!! sending you big hugs!!!! xxx
CommentAuthorVx Debz xV
I waas thinking of walking myself down the aisle, but I don't think I can do it, so if my brother refuses then my Matron of honour will do it, as she was very close to my dad .. :) It'll be ok, I know he'll be there, I just wish he could be in person, and share my joy... more than anything I wish he met George, not just heard me going on about him! LoL! xx
CommentAuthorwelshcerys
I feel so bad for you Debz - had me crying when I read all of your posts girls! Maybe ask your mother to walk you down the aisle?? Or your matron of honour will be lovely - especially if she was close to your dad x
CommentAuthorxx MrsM2b xx
I lost my Dad when i was 6 and my Mum, Brother and Newphew in a very short space of time. My H2b lost his Dad the same year as I lost my Mum. I am having a friend walk me down, but at the end(ish) of the evening I have helium balloons with hearts attached, so that people can write messages on them and let them go! =) Big love to all of you who have lost someone close xx
CommentAuthorVx Debz xV
That sounds like a fantastic Idea... I can put a balloon on the back of each chair for the ceremony, and then get a group shot, before all release the balloons. Thank you so much, I don't feel quite so alone and sorry for myself right now. x
CommentAuthorgijayne
hi debz. you've had me in tears too. i lost my mum just over a year ago and planning the wedding without her is one of the hardest things i have ever done. My brother is my best friend and i dont think that it should matter what his girlfriend thinks of you. you are family and you have both recently lost your father. cant you text your brother and ask hie if he fancies going for a drink with you or for some lunch so you can talk to him alone?? i think the rose idea is lovely. i'm planning on saying something in my speech (if i can hod=ld it together enough) i have also seen little photo frames which are attached to ribbon that you tie into your bouquet so you can have a pic of a loved one. the ribbon is blue on the frame to so you have your 'something blue' covered. i hope you sort it all out soon xx
CommentAuthorsbride
Not sure if u believe in life after death, but I do and Im sure your dad will be with you the whole day hun x
I am now Mrs Stacey Stiles and loving it!
CommentAuthorShellster90
Aww sorry to hear that Debs :) Hope things brighten up for you the best way they can :D xx
CommentAuthorden1se
just thinking of other things you can do to ensure your dad is there to share your day, maybe naming each table after his favourite songs? its a shame about the fear of birds, i'm not keen on the helium balloons cos i'd be concerned about the impact on the environment. you could always place a bottle on the bar for donations to his favourite charity or hospital (if he was having treatment maybe). think its a good idea inviting your brother out for lunch then he's got the opportunity to talk without her. x
CommentAuthorVx Debz xV
Yeah I live 120 miles away from my brother now so lunch is difficult but I do phone him each wednesday night when she's out so we an keep in touch. Den I was a bit concerned but as it's such a small gathering of close family and friends, (max of 40 inc children) it might be ok. I have plenty of time to think things through. He loved Neil Diamond so maybe I can find a few songs to be played that won't have me in tears. :o\ Sbride, I do believe and I know that he will be there, thats why I'm a bit worried, I don't want to walk up the aisle in tears!!
CommentAuthorden1se
you will prob cry but make sure you have a hanky maybe folded up down the front of your dress. i cried whilst walking up the aisle and was a sniffering wreck cos i didnt have a hanky. i was quite embarrassed about crying but couldnt help myself lol. was such an emotional day. not sure i wont cry this time round although i wont bet on it! lunch would prob be a problem then lol. i'm sure he will make the right choice. you're his sister for life, she may not be in his life forever so i think you should come first over her on this one and after all you wont have another wedding day. fingers crossed for you on wed's. my dad loved neil diamond as well lol. maybe one table could be 'sweet caroline' another xxx - sorry i cant think of any other songs of his off top of my head! really hope you sort it with him hun x
CommentAuthorVx Debz xV
Yeah I'm gonna hide a hanky behind my bouquet, and my MoH is testing many waterproof mascaras for me! As we're not having a sit down meal, we won't have many tables as such, just some dotted around the room for people to sit down to eat buffet (or olds to rest) but I'm sure I'll come up with something. Yeah I know now that it's not him, it's down to her, he admitted to missing me, but "can't deal with the S*** he gets off her for talking to me" I just hope he gets enough balls to say "ya know what, for ONE day I'm gonna put my sister above you, come if you want, but please don't stop me" :)
CommentAuthorden1se
well in time hopefully he'll realise that she's not worth it and she's got 13 months to moan about it then she might just dig a hole for herself and he might dump her! anyway fingers crossed. good luck on the waterproof mascara's, never wore any lol! maybe somethings on the table's where the food will be then. let me know what he says on wed's x
CommentAuthorSuzi
Oh Dear Lord you girls make me realise how lucky I am to have both my parents still.. I am sat here with tears in my eyes reading your messages!
I will be without my brother and cousin on my big day but something we must all remember is that although they may not be there in person they will most definitely be there in spirit, take it from a medium who know's her job well ;o) x x x x
Do not disturb... Already disturbed enough!
CommentAuthorNicci
I miss my mam and dad every day, even more so when planning a wedding. I know my parents would have been extremally proud of me just like all your mams and dads will be of you (((hugs))) x
CommentAuthorshellay
i lost my dad twenty years ago and i still miss him, and will hate him not walking me up the aisle, i am going to play the song "dance with my father again" just for him x
I have know my soulmate for 27 years and on the 6th August
I married him and became Mrs Garnham.
It was most definitely the happiest day of my life.
I love married life !!!!
CommentAuthorNicci
Awwww thats lovely shellay-the time goes sooooooo quickly doesnt it?! My mams 19th annerversary is coming up in june and it was my dads 10th on valentines day. Only seems like yesterday they were still around x