Hi! My best fried and I have been friends ever since we were 3, we have always been realy good friends and I love her to bits. The problem is, we have always said we would be each other's bridesmaids and that we would have each other as a bridesmaid no matter what. When I got engaged of corse she automatically assumed she would be my bridesmaid. The problem is I can't afford to have her as my bridesmaid, I have my sister as my moh and my other half's 2 nice's (they will be 13 and 2 when I get married). I am on a tight budget and just can't streach to have her too. I Just don't know how to tell her, I feel so guilty and know it would really upsett her. What shall I say? The longer I leave it the worse it will get, I just haven't been able to tell her yet. Please help. X
Started going out with my Gorgeous man 7/11/2010
Got engaged on the 21/9/2013
became mrs Thornton on the 2/8/2015
our wedding day was the best day ever :)!
CommentAuthorSonya
I'm sure if she's been your friend all that time she will totally understand. I'd just tell her money is way too tight and it's not that you don't want her to be your bm it really is just the money. Maybe if she could buy her dress and shoes she could still be your bm?
Became Mrs Mulholland on September 12th 2014!!!
CommentAuthorCatherineR
Tell her that you still want her as a bridesmaid but due to the budget you are struggling to make ends meet. We went through this with our bms last week and 4 of them offered to buy their own as it was only about £30/40. It is how you approach it more than anything.... 'I would still love you as a bm so would you be able to contribute?' She can keep her dress too if she wants then to make use of it! Xx
Married my wife on 15.08.15
Honeymooned on the Isles of Scilly :)
CommentAuthoralmost a year wife!!
Tell her the truth... She may pay her way if she really wants to be a bm... Never make promises you may not be able to keep x
Ill marry my hero
CommentAuthor*KelBel*
I think you should talk to her and perhaps see if she will buy her own dress if it means that much to her x
Velcro...my wedding day twinny! The Two Kel's!
Got engaged 14/10/12 in Central Park NYC!
Became Mrs Macdonald 13th September 2014
Mummy to 4 girlies and baby blue boy Due 10/05/2016
I would also say ask if she can buy her own dress. Alternatively see if she and your sister would each pay part. I would be willing to pay for a dress if I was asked to be a bridesmaid by someone who couldn't afford to buy the dress for me. After all I do get to keep it.
30th August 2014 was the best birthday ever.
It was the day that I became Mrs. Dixon.
CommentAuthorWhovianbride
All my bms have offered to pay for there own dresses as they know that we are on a tight budget, as has our groomsmen offered to pay for there suits. Were so lucky to gave such great friends and family! X
Met June 2009 on my Birthday,Met again July 2009 and got
together, May 2010 Moved in,Jan 2011 got pregnant,
August 2011 Got our own place, 2011 Had our Baby Girl,
Dec 2011 Got engaged, July 2015 Getting married! Yay!
CommentAuthorBethanyS
I agree with the others, she will understand if you have been friends for so long, but she might perhaps take the strain off of you if she wants to be a bridesmaid that much. Talk to her, see what she says. x
CommentAuthor*The NewMrsMalin*
Met in 2009
Got together on12th May 2011, proposed on the 12th May 2013
When you get knocked down; smile and pick yourself up again!
Fight for what you believe in!
CommentAuthorTheFutureMrsK
Can't you have your other half's 2 year old niece as a flower girl and still have your best friend as a bridesmaid? I guess that doesnt really help the money situation though :( as everyone else has said I would talk to her and maybe see if she can pay some of it. Someone said if she's your friend she'll understand but no matter how close friends you are I would still be miffed especially if you've promised for years and years. As you said its better to talk to her sooner rather than later xxx
“Love, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage.”
-Ambrose Bierce
CommentAuthorVelcro
I'd ditch the kids in favour of my mate, tbh. The 2 yr old won't even remember
Wibbly wobbly, timey wimey
*Kelbel* is my wedding twinny!
CommentAuthorMrsCross2be
I think you are better talking to her and telling her the money situation and saying you would love her to be but can only afford to pay X towards the dress than tell her she cant be it at all- then the ball is in her court.
CommentAuthorBecky1608
If I was in her position, I'd definitely offer to pay for my own dress to still be a BM. You could then do the same when she gets married? Xxx
29/09/2008 - The Day we met
12/11/2008 - When we decided to be more than friends
04/11/2012 - A proposal in Central Park NYC
08/11/2014 - The day we say I do!
