I know I've wrote in other posts before about what MIL has said or done, but now it's REALLY getting to me. To the point where I pretended I had eaten this weekend just so I wouldn't have to go to hers for dinner.
Everytime we see her now, they (her and her dreadful partner) ask how things are coming along with the wedding, but then proceed to tell us how much nicer the place is that their staying than where we are. They are staying on the opposite side of the island to EVERYBODY else, and keep harping on about how gorgeous it is and how much more stunning and relaxing it is. This is the place we have chosen for our wedding and honeymoon and all they can do is complain that we havent chosen a nice place.
Next is the Grandmother. MIL's Mum. She hasn't decided whether she is coming yet or not because "she doesn't agree with it" (not the wedding, the fact that we are getting married in Greece and arent Greek! And that we are 'forcing' people to pay for our wedding...) Last time we spoke to his mum together, she said "So I've thought that we could do one day on, one day off with Grandma..." I asked what she meant... "You have her for one day, then we'll have her the next, and rotate it like that." I LAUGHED!!!! So that's a perfectly reasonable request? For us, on our Honeymoon, with 40 other guests to consider, to entertain a pensioner every other day- who's at the opposite end of the Island!!!! Her other request was that we 'go to see them and spend time with them during the holiday as well'... they chose to stay at the other side of the island, so that they were away from everyone else.
I feel like she says these things to get on my nerves and to get a reaction out of me. If not, then it's what she actually thinks.
Sorry for rant!! But I need to shout about it!!!
This is just one example...unfortunatley there are a lot more!!!
anyone else got serious in laws issues??!! Might make me feel better about dealing with this one forever!!! xxx
CommentAuthorb2bnicola
Yup i have issues lol!!!!!!
I think youve gotta pretty much win the lottery to have an inlaw be nice lol! Mine was even a friend before I met my h2b (she introduced us) and since weve got engaged has been a nightmare! x
Happily Married! :) xxx
CommentAuthorb2bnicola
if they wana stay away from everyone then let them hun! just ignore what she says about how nice her place is, because at the end of the day u have ur reasons for choosing ur place and its going to mean the world to you once ur married there.... so her stoopid place can buga off!
as far as his gran goes.... if shes staying at the other end with ur in laws then its fair to say they shud be entertaining her not u... it is ur wedding and ur honeymoon hun! xx
Happily Married! :) xxx
CommentAuthorBeckyU98
its your wedding and your honeymoon so you do exactly what you want to do and dont listen to them! if shes pissing you off then you should get H2B involved. technically they are not your family yet so make him deal with it! however always be polite - its never good to fall out with MIL as they can make your life hell lol
i have to say i have been pretty lucky with my MIL. she does some things sometimes that piss me off but hasn't tried to interfere with the wedding yet. she gives me her honest opinion and i listen to it but if i dont agree with her then i just say yeah thats a good idea... but im going to do it like this xx
CommentAuthorElinor Claire
I'm lucky, I've got on really well with my in-laws since I first met them, and even more so now that I'm joining the family. They just treat me like I'm another one of their children.
Sorry you're having such a bad time. Is there someone that can be given responsability for keeping her out of your hair while you're in Greece?
30th August 2014 was the best birthday ever.
It was the day that I became Mrs. Dixon.
I am actually lucky as get on really well with my MIL .
In relation to your wedding, I went to Sorrento for a family wedding and there were elderly relatives who couldn't leave hotel apart from the actual wedding . The bride and groom stayed in one hotel and the rest of us stayed in different ones around the town and it actually worked out most of youngsters like me were staying in same hotel so we spent time together and met up on certain days . The elderly relatives went to a hotel which was somewhere with fantastic views and places to eat and drink in hotel .
I would say it's your wedding and your honeymoon and people can see it as a holiday of their own so each set of people can do their own stuff ! Good luck
Somehow always connected , finally became friends .
Friends became soul mates :)
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CommentAuthorDanni13
Yeah she will definitely be out of my hair in Greece, ill just be uncontactable!! lol.
I know what you mean too Welshbride, I really want everyone to have their own ideal holiday, and I have said stay where you like. It's just the demands of we must go and see them and we must take his Grandma out, so its kinda the other way round- their dictating to me how I spend my holiday!! Not fine!!
We've got just over 8 months to go now- so I know I cant avoid speaking to her about it at all, just gotta bite my lip- which it seems I'll have to for many years!!
CommentAuthorWelshBrideBethan2015
Count to ten and breathe lol
Maybe mention stuff like oh when we are in honeymoon part of week a friend has mentioned this place to visit and also here and here it will be nice to have just couple time after the big day . Just google local sights etc and make it up and if she asks after did you go say trip was full or just didn't fancy it lol
Somehow always connected , finally became friends .
Friends became soul mates :)
Engaged 6th July 2013
<3 <3 Married my best friend 11/7/2015 <3 <3
CommentAuthorWhovianbride
If you get on with in laws your very lucky, my mil really bugs the hell out of me!
Met June 2009 on my Birthday,Met again July 2009 and got
together, May 2010 Moved in,Jan 2011 got pregnant,
August 2011 Got our own place, 2011 Had our Baby Girl,
Dec 2011 Got engaged, July 2015 Getting married! Yay!
CommentAuthorLauraY27
Oh, how awful! It's fair for her to make demands on you at all! It's your wedding!
I've been really lucky I get on with mil really well and have been welcomed with open arms. I'm often thanked for saving her son!
You don't have to like her, just be civil lol x
CommentAuthorlala "mod" bunni
you just have to say your sorry but you cant do grandma days as you are / have booked somethings for you to do on your own
I've only just met my MIL but she seems lovely thus far - she mentioned that our wedding day is about us, not her to H2B's dad/stepmum or my parents. That gives me hope that she won't interfere much :)
CommentAuthorFernP61
uh oh sounds like a right witch tell them if they dont feel they want to attend then they dont have to! thats just rude harping on about having to be greek etc grrr x
CommentAuthorCharlieBe-Cool
Its reading posts like this that make me glad I (a) have a lovely MIL2b and (b) dont see her often anyway lol. My mum will potentially be far worse!
Met my prince charming - May 2002
Finally tying the knot - July 2015
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CommentAuthorlala "mod" bunni
Hun if it makes you feel better I would swap your MIL for mine ...... Mine told me my children would be better off if I was dead and hasn't spoken to me in nearly 2 yrs bc I wouldn't have mr lalas nieces as bm's ....and I took her off my FB list !!!
Lol, your MIL2B sounds hilarious. She sounds like a busybody with a superiority complex. Grandma isn't even sure she's coming, but she's deciding who will be responsible for her?? I'd avoid this conversation with her, change the subject or say you'll talk about it to her closer to the time. Tbh, I'm sure she'll find someone to witter on about this to if you stop listening.
CommentAuthorWelshBrideBethan2015
Lala how could you remove someone from facebook in this day and age that's like smacking someone in the face with a fish !!!
Somehow always connected , finally became friends .
Friends became soul mates :)
Engaged 6th July 2013
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CommentAuthorSJJ
How rude!!!! What does h2b think of her behaviour? I'm afraid I would probably tell MIL exactly how I think she is bang out of order and ruffle feathers!!!
I don't know if it's a good or a bad thing atm, but my MiL couldn't give a cr@p about our wedding, has not asked one question about ANYTHING, when we told her we had booked she just said "oh right" I doubt she'll even buy a new outfit for the day or anything!!! Lol xx
CommentAuthorSJJ
And OMG Lala!!!!!!!!
CommentAuthorDanni13
The oddest thing is, is that to her face I can be lovely, but im bubbling inside with the things she says.
Last month she accused me of not inviting her to H2B's surprise 30th Birthday!!! I invited her first and was told 'it wasn't her thing', the day after she said, in front of me, "Well i didnt know anything about it, and if I had have known, I would have come" its a wonder i didnt chuck a chair at her!!!! liar. I followed that up by shouting at H2B in the car and saying she was a f*king liar and how dare she make me out to be the bad guy!! It was his own mother who didnt attend his 30th- 50 other people did!!!
H2b just continues to make excuses for her by saying "that's just the way she is".
I doubt they will contribute anything to the wedding, not really bothered to be honest, all she will say is that we earn more than her & her partner so why should they when we are "choosing their next holiday for them" aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!
Lala- thats terrible she said that! You must have gone balistic!!!
CommentAuthorBecky1608
Oh dear!
You definitely shouldn't feel like you have to be responsible for the grandma when it's your wedding and honeymoon!
I'd just put my foot down!! xxx
29/09/2008 - The Day we met
12/11/2008 - When we decided to be more than friends
04/11/2012 - A proposal in Central Park NYC
08/11/2014 - The day we say I do!
CommentAuthorHayley Elizabeth
MIL - who needs them and their bleedin opinions!! Yes... i have one of those mean and snide commenting ones too!! xx
CommentAuthormiss_finch
My OH makes excuses for his mother too!!! I always got along with her (as she hates her other daughter-in-law) until last year when I fell pregnant and my OH decided to move from Northampton to Manchester. She didn't speak to me for about 6 months!!! The other week she told H2B over the phone that this wedding is 3 years away and is already making her so stressed she is becoming depressed because she doesn't understand why we need to have such an expensive venue(its £8500) not any of her business though. Apparently, we are never going to afford that... what does she know? She lives 133 miles away and never picks up the phone or visits so knows nothing about our lives! She was nasty and vile to him on the phone and he came off almost crying!!! I slagged her off a bit because i was mad at her for making him feel guilty and he turned round and had a go at me!!!! He is allowed to bitch about her but apparently, I am not!!!
To my face she is lovely though!!!! xx
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CommentAuthorWelshBrideBethan2015
Miss Finch I think family rule thing comes in as in if you have a brother or sister you can call them all names under sun but someone like a friend does same and it not allowed . I don't agree with what she has done or been saying but you may find the above rule happening a lot
Somehow always connected , finally became friends .
Friends became soul mates :)
Engaged 6th July 2013
<3 <3 Married my best friend 11/7/2015 <3 <3
CommentAuthorBecca
wow ... she sounds awful, im marrying a lad who is the youngest of 5 brothers, yes the youngest, the baby, and boy i dont i know about it! just lately everything is bring gone through like hair in fine tooth comb! we wanted to move out last year but no, we couldnt because she couldnt be left (she isnt left by herself, someone else lives with her) and even his brothers said that it wouldnt be fair for us to move out, who could she rely on? we have recently just bought a pup (little samoyed) called snooki, she is mine and my h2b, we have set certain rules etc as she is so young we are trying to train her, i especially do not want her eating canned dog food or pouches or anything like that(she has a dodgy stomach), she has her own food, i get in from work my 10 week old pup is being viciously sick "oh becca, i gave snooki a pouch of cat food, i think she might need a vet though" ... she even bitched about me to the future brother in laws wives... how im not showing any signs of wanting children yet blah blah blah... absolutely lovely to my face, but behind my back the rest of the family probably think im a raging B****.
good luck with your greek wedding, it sounds lovely and im sure your guests dont mind paying to go out for the wedding, they get a holiday too!
i hope you have a lovely day/night and honeymoon!
xxxx
CommentAuthorDanni13
Its good to hear that some people have to deal with it too!!! I thought it was the men who were meant to hate their mother-in-laws!!
Lucky for me I get on really well with his step mum and his dad, they love me lodas and they are great.
But yes, I know I will have to bite my tongue a lot in the years to come- funny but its the only thing me and H2B's ex have in common!! But her on a far worse scale, it got to the point where he never saw her because his ex refused to go and see his mum- they mutually didnt like each other and made no effort at all. Im told the ex once stayed in the bedroom when she came over just so not to see her...awkward!! lol. But I can actually see the girls point of view...and I never thought Id say that!!!
CommentAuthorTaidiN
Omg she sounds nicer then mine. Lol. My h2b is the oldest boy and her favourite. The is an 11 year age gap. She told me i was to young for him and that we will never last. And i was must filling the gap until he finds some one on the same level as him. So i turn round and said im a better level then any of the women his dated before and if she don't the age she should just keep out of our relationship. So when she found out i was pregnant i was every name under the son. Which don't bother me. I been with oh over 5 years and two kids and we got engaged last Xmas she turn round as said that i would never be her family and my kids come last to all her other grandchildren which dont bother me either. My oh works with his dad and told him we started looking at venues and she called him uo demanding to know why she not involved and that she wants to coming as we need her opinion.
So trust me i know about mil form hell. Lol. But i would just stick to your guns at the end of the day its your day. Not a family holiday. Xxx
CommentAuthorDanni13
Oh wow!!! She sounds horrible!! I dont have them problem at the moment....and I know when we have kids she will want to be involved, to the extent where it might drive me insane!! But what shes said to you is so out of order.
I hope H2B sticks up for you!!
CommentAuthorStephHsoon2bBodkin
As awful as this sounds my MIL doesn't have a say. Its my family paying for the wedding. My OH agrees. She is cool though and i have no issues. I don't listen to anyone anyway and discuss things between me and my OH. Its our day and luckily my family agree and if i ask their opinion i get it. :) TaidiN i feel awful how dare she put your children last! sorry but that's harsh. I thought it was italian american mums who were pushy! x
Found the man of my dreams
Getting Married on the 13th June 2015
CommentAuthorTaidiN
Lol. It is a horrible thing to say about my kids but as I told oh there my mums only grandchildren so she spoils them. To the fact my 2 year never wants to leave her. Lol. But I do think with mil as long as you stand up for your self and you decisions then they will back down. Xxx
CommentAuthorStephHsoon2bBodkin
yea that's true.. one day she will regret neglecting her grandchildren, they will resent her. i think having grandparents in a childs life is important. And its awful when you read things like this. My grandparents are the best and they love my OH like he's their grand child. He even calls them granddad and Nan.. Grr gotta love family xx
Found the man of my dreams
Getting Married on the 13th June 2015
