This is the closest category I could get for this so I hope it's ok here!
My fiancee and I got engaged quite a few months ago but we have been struggling to tell my family in particular... My fiancee's family are overjoyed and couldn't be happier which we knew would be the case..... However, we are going down to my parents next week to wave off my sister off to Uni so we are thinking that we will finally bottle up the courage to tell them over a nice dinner. I know we are wimps and should have told them ages ago but my mother has been less than complimentary about our relationship (we are 2 girls btw) and hasn't been coping that well with it. Do you think over dinner is a good idea or maybe at home? In other words, HELP PLEASE!!! Thanks :) xxx
Married my wife on 15.08.15
Honeymooned on the Isles of Scilly :)
CommentAuthorsarah
I'm going to assume you mean a dinner at a some public venue. I think if making the announcement in public will ensure that they behave themselves when they hear the news, then go for it. However, if they are likely to make a scene I would make the announcement at home. Luckily, either way they'll have some time to get used to the news.
CommentAuthorCatherineR
Well it would be going out to dinner so we could have some private time as 2 happy couples.. They wouldn't make a scene at all. I've been toying with how to tell them for months so I thought I would ask and see if any of you have any ideas .. Do any of you have any families you were nervous to tell? How did you handle it? xx
Married my wife on 15.08.15
Honeymooned on the Isles of Scilly :)
CommentAuthorlala "mod" bunni
you know what ..... JUST TELL THEM ...... whats the worst they can say ? if they dont approve its their hang up.
if you were my daughter the fact that you were happy and had somebody that you loved and loved you would be the most inportant thing to me
Personally, I'd tell them before hand so as not to upset the otherside of the family with any awkwardness, and also give your mum time to process it before she sees you.
It's like a plaster, rip it off! Get it out there!
just go for it - you have been engaged for months and you need to tell them - the longer you leave it the worse it will get x
CommentAuthorMrsRusty2B
I was nervous about telling my parents as I thought they'd say "Oh it's too soon for you to be engaged. Don't you think you should wait a bit longer?" or something to that effect. Instead, I got a phonecall from my mum the day after we got engaged (we'd sent them a text as it was rather late and we didn't want to wake them up by phoning) talking about how fantastic it was and how happy she and Dad are for me. I will venture to say - she made my day and my fiancé made the previous day *grins*
CommentAuthorCatherineR
Ok ladies, thanks! I'm just a coward and hate confrontation... I'll suck it up and do it but I am truly terrified to tell them, I just want them to be happy for me!!
Married my wife on 15.08.15
Honeymooned on the Isles of Scilly :)
CommentAuthorCatherineR
We got together in January finally but didn't tell anyone until May that we were together so I can just imagine what some will say, I worry too much about people's reactions :/
Married my wife on 15.08.15
Honeymooned on the Isles of Scilly :)
CommentAuthorLauraY27
We were absolutely terrified about what h2b's parents would say and were worried they'd disapprove because I'm quite young. We took his mum and stepdad out for dinner, told them and they were overjoyed and have been so helpful with planning etc. He then told his dad on the phone the same night. They'll probably react differently to how you think they'll react. Good luck :)x
CommentAuthorCatherineR
Thank you honey, that's really helped settle me down a bit! Glad to hear you had a worrying time telling them but were actually ok :) we've decided to take them out to dinner to thank them for having us so much over the summer (Uni students, lots of hols) and tell them our good news too :) xx
Married my wife on 15.08.15
Honeymooned on the Isles of Scilly :)
CommentAuthorLyndsey M
By what you've said above 'having us so much over the summer', I assume they have accepted your relationship and are comfortable spending time with you as a couple.
I am hoping the fact that you two are clearly committed, they will be over the moon knowing how serious you are and how happy you are.
CommentAuthorfuturemrst
I had a similar issue- my family set up is complicated and so my mum is giving me away instead of my dad- but I had to tell my dad this! I dont see him often so in the end I had to call him and just came out with it- guess what? It was no where near as bad as I expected! Try and be as positive as you can when you tell them- im sure they have reasons why they wouldnt be happy to hear of your engagement so try and plan answers to any argument they might have. most importantly give them time to think and let the news sink in- they might eventually realise how happy you are and see this as the good news it is! Good luck!
CommentAuthorElinor Claire
I don't have any advice I'm afraid, I just wanted to say I hope it goes well. Hopefully your happiness will be all that matters to them. Do let us know how it goes.
30th August 2014 was the best birthday ever.
It was the day that I became Mrs. Dixon.
CommentAuthoralmost a year wife!!
id just do it and get it over with coz the more u sit on it the worse it will become x
Ill marry my hero
CommentAuthorCatherineR
Thank you, great advice ladies! Basically, bite the bullet and do it, probably best! The longer I leave it, the worse it's getting.. Very true! xx
Married my wife on 15.08.15
Honeymooned on the Isles of Scilly :)
CommentAuthorJoanna
I agree with the other ladies, tell them sooner rather than later. I bet you'll be pleasantly surprised by their reactions :) good luck x
The greatest thing you'll ever learn
is just to love and be loved in return
<3
CommentAuthorMrsH-2B
I agree to tell then sooner and I bet everyone's right and their reaction will be a lot happier than you expect :-) good luck and let us know :-) xxx
I can't wait to become his Wife :-) <3
4th July 2015 <3
CommentAuthorCatherineR
Thank you girlies, you've been wonderful and really helped calm me down. I've been stressing so much about this as I just want them to be proud of me and not say anything nasty when we are so happy! We've decided to get an Indian takeaway, set up the table nicely in the living room and have a nice evening in with the 4 of us then tell them all of our plans. Fingers crossed ladies! Will bite the bullet and tell them, time to get my big girls pants out of the drawer and hoist them high for battle :D xxx
Married my wife on 15.08.15
Honeymooned on the Isles of Scilly :)
CommentAuthorTaidiN
edited
Hey there your mum should be okay with it. Mums tend to over react at the begging of any relationship. Well my mum does anyway. Lol. As soon as you tell her that your engaged I bet she will start to make wedding plans with out you both. Xxx
CommentAuthorCatherineR
Thanks, I know she wouldn't do anything in public.. Or I'd hope not! I'll just tell her all our lovely ideas and dazzle her with how wonderful I am haha! Where have the children come from though?! I think you may have got the wrong end of the stick because for one thing I don't have any and for another.. We are two girls getting wed honey :) xxxxxx
Married my wife on 15.08.15
Honeymooned on the Isles of Scilly :)
CommentAuthorTaidiN
Lol. Sorry multi tasking. Lol. That why I hate doing every thing on my phone. I thing my mate found funny when I explained what I had just done. Lol. Xxx
CommentAuthorCatherineR
Hahaha, it's ok .. We had a little giggle too sweetie.... As did the family in the living room!! :D we do plan to have kiddies but not quite yet lol xxx
Married my wife on 15.08.15
Honeymooned on the Isles of Scilly :)
CommentAuthorTaidiN
Lol. I glad I made U smile. Tbh with ya im all over the place. I have two young child my oldest is two next week and isn't computuers broken so I have to live if my phone. So, so far today I send U the wrong message. My daugthers birthday cake to the wrong address. Lol my 8 month old is teehing and i just message my mum something that was meant very much to the other half. Pmsl. So sorry bout that. Lol. And with the kids make sure U have a huge gap between them. Teething child who doesn't sleep at night and a nightmare two year. Thank god i anit planning a wedding. Lol. Xxxxxx
CommentAuthorCatherineR
Haha, it's really not a problem! Just tickled my fancy as it t'were :D sounds like you've got enough to contend with today but happy birthday to your daughter next week!! When's the wedding then?! With all those young sprogs you must have your hands full!! xxxxxx
Married my wife on 15.08.15
Honeymooned on the Isles of Scilly :)
CommentAuthorWhovianbride
does your sister know? could she not help back you up when you tell them. i had this same deal of being scared to tell people when i got pregnant expesh my bff, she did not like the idea of young pregnancy at all so i told her with 2 of our other friends 1 who had a kid and 1 who wanted kids and was all broody so when i told them she could not flip out
Met June 2009 on my Birthday,Met again July 2009 and got
together, May 2010 Moved in,Jan 2011 got pregnant,
August 2011 Got our own place, 2011 Had our Baby Girl,
Dec 2011 Got engaged, July 2015 Getting married! Yay!
CommentAuthorCatherineR
Oh that's helpful, thank you! My sister does know but I'm unwilling to use her as my parents would be upset if they knew that she knew before they did! However, I think I may employ her to give a hand in telling them or at least advice on how to manage them :)
Married my wife on 15.08.15
Honeymooned on the Isles of Scilly :)
CommentAuthorTaidiN
Lol. Not til 3 years away. I want the girls to walk with me down the aisle. Lol. So are U planning already? Xxxx
CommentAuthorWhovianbride
well if you tell them all at dinner , she can just make out she did not know and be like, wow congrats guys and go give you a big hug, to lead the way on how they should react as its good news! x
Met June 2009 on my Birthday,Met again July 2009 and got
together, May 2010 Moved in,Jan 2011 got pregnant,
August 2011 Got our own place, 2011 Had our Baby Girl,
Dec 2011 Got engaged, July 2015 Getting married! Yay!
CommentAuthorsarah
When's the dinner? I have my fingers crossed for you.
CommentAuthorCatherineR
Next Friday but maybe Thursday if we can manage it but they return from the holidays the day before so will have to see - Eek! Hopefully we can use my sister and Grandma who know to be helpful pacifiers and say 'congrats, so pleased for you!' like you suggested :D xx
Married my wife on 15.08.15
Honeymooned on the Isles of Scilly :)
