I am in a similar position to Amy who has also posted today and commented that her parents are funding half of their day. My parents are being all traditional and are paying for the major stuff like reception and church and dress and we are paying for flowers, favours, cake etc. My partner really hates this as he would rather we saved up ourselves but that is by the by.
Anyway- they too are quite forceful with their point of view on guest lists and suits.
I envisaged our best men, ushers including Chris' and my brother wearing the same suit? My dad piped up that they can all wear whatever they want - my brother and my dad will be getting suits made in whatever style they like according to my family. Well I agree my dad can look different but surely if my brother is one of the ushers he should wear the same? I dont want everyone looking odd, they at first said they can wear anything i.e one in blue pin stripe, one in grey but they have kind of waivered and suggested I can say anything grey.
Confused! Chris says that him,his best man and his ushers are planning on going together so that will mean my brother looks different.
Stuck in the middle!!!!
CommentAuthorMrsWright290912
We had my hubby, the best man and my dad all in suits from the same place. We didnt have ushers etc and hubbys dad and brother wore their own suits, as did my brother.
I really did marry my Mr Wright and we had a nice day for a
Wright wedding!
Mexico for our first anniversary <3
CommentAuthorWhovianbride
I agree that grooms men should look the same and one different would look odd! My oh is wearing a different suit from his bm and groomsmen tho, because hes wearing white tie tailcoat like matt smiths, white the rest will be wearing grey morning suits like rory!
Met June 2009 on my Birthday,Met again July 2009 and got
together, May 2010 Moved in,Jan 2011 got pregnant,
August 2011 Got our own place, 2011 Had our Baby Girl,
Dec 2011 Got engaged, July 2015 Getting married! Yay!
CommentAuthor*The NewMrsMalin*
I'd say that it looks best matching but that is just my opinion :)
Met in 2009
Got together on12th May 2011, proposed on the 12th May 2013
When you get knocked down; smile and pick yourself up again!
Fight for what you believe in!
CommentAuthorMrsCross2be
The we agree MrsM haha i dont mind my dad and chris being different but it would look odd with others different. They are saying that for their wedding 27 years ago people just wore what they wanted....
It's more common nowadays to have all the groomsmen matching, however my h2b (who's forty five) said that at most weddings he's been to the ushers have just normal clothes.
I think it's nice to have all the groomsmen matching, that way guests will now they are an usher and be able to seek them out to ask directions or about timings etc.
Xx
My Beating Heart Belongs To You
30 August 2013
The First Day Of My Happily Ever After
CommentAuthor*The NewMrsMalin*
:)
Met in 2009
Got together on12th May 2011, proposed on the 12th May 2013
When you get knocked down; smile and pick yourself up again!
Fight for what you believe in!
CommentAuthorValentinaK
They don't have to match...for instance, My H2B will be wearing his military uniform... the dads will be wearing tails and the other ushers will be wearing suits. Negotiate and have matching colour and ties for example.
My parents are paying a massive chunk too, but at the end of the day, I'd rather have a wedding and have to compromise (after all they've been to a lot more weddings, have had their friends' childrens wedding stories to learn from and are saving me and H2B about £8000 that we either would have had to have saved up and waited longer to get married, or have less guests and less luxuries at the wedding) than be a few grand poorer or have to wait or have less of the good things that I love that they are paying for- like my dress and the catering.
Perhaps I'm lucky too that I share a strong connection with my parents in taste and style... the worst things we have argued about are the guest list and whether i'll have a fake tan or not!
i think some people need to understand that yes, parental contributuon does mean they have some input and they should traditionally. Fair enough if you're paying for it all yourself, if you are willing to accept contributuons, you must be willing to agree to certain things. After all it is a day for parents to showcase you too and they will want to invite certain people and also ensure that certain family members are invited to stop huge family rifts... we don't always understand the deeper relationships between more extended family members than perhaps your parents understand....
And we lived happily ever after!
CommentAuthorMrsCross2be
I agree Valentina - I have a strong bond with them and I am grateful and I dont really mind too many of the people on the guest list and they are doing most things just for me. But some things I think rub Chris up the wrong way and I get stuck in the middle. I wasnt meaning I am ungrateful at all im sorry if it came across like that. Its mainly just on this issue we disagree because of their views etc.
CommentAuthorSuzieS
I think I need to show my fil2b this!! We had a massive row as he wouldn't wear the same suit as h2b he wanted a different cut as not everyone's body shape is the same. Which is kind of true. We've compromised on having the same colour suit. I hope they stick to their word. I wanted fathers, ushers and h2b to be same suit really, as I really like this trend. Xx
CommentAuthorValentinaK
My OH is called Chris too... and yes, he feels the same and says sometimes when things are getting a bit more complex and less instantaneous/snap decision like, he gets frustrated and says we should have just saved up and done it ourselves... but we'd still be several thousand pounds down for a glorified party which could be used towards our house deposit or other more long term things than a party!
So sometimes you just gotta go with it and look at the bigger picture and remind H2B of the same thing. They calm down eventually anyway!
You didn't come across as ungrateful but you do see a lot of ungrateful diva types on here sometimes that think it doesn't matter whose paying... it does! The reason aprents mostly chip in is to support and help out the couple so they can start married life more financially comfortable and have a lovely day and focus on the more important things... If this means they make a few decisions and have a few wants, then so be it! That's the way it's always been... if couples accept the money, they should accept the unwritten and unspoken terms of it...which is parental decisions in some cases...no matter how old their son or daughter getting hitched is!
And we lived happily ever after!
CommentAuthorSuzieS
Well I say a massive row.. I had a strop and decided it was a row. Tbf to me, I had been on an early shift at work so I was a bit grumpy haha x
CommentAuthoralmost a year wife!!
I feel they should all match unless there's a military uniform involved, for ex: if the groom or any best man/ushers are in forces then they wear uniform, then those who aren't in the forces but still in the bridal party should wear matching suits
Ill marry my hero
CommentAuthorRennie1989
Groom and best man are wearing hire suits but the dads are not. They have bought their own suits and my dad has bought a tie to match the colour theme. I went against anyone else wearing hired suits other than groom and best man because with small numbers I wouldn't want half of the male guests in hired suits, it would look far too formal. At one stage all three brothers and both dads were going to wear hired suits, just too much.
CommentAuthorMel D
edited
We had Groom, best man, and the man who gave me away in matching hired suits. The fathers and partners of the bridesmaids wore their own suits and we gave them a tie to wear in our colurs. They all seemed to wear dark suits, but I can't remember the color .. it all looked great as they were wearing the tie which matched the bridesmaids dresses xx
Got married Sat 28/05/2011
Renewing vows Sat 29/05/2021
We're planning WELL in advance!!
CommentAuthorMrsH-2B
They should all wear matching suits IMO.. Our guys - H2B, best man, dads x2, my bro and stepsons x2 will all have the same suit.. The only difference is H2B will be wearing a different coloured waistcoat and cravat.. But the other men/boys will all match in that respect.. Xxx
I can't wait to become his Wife :-) <3
4th July 2015 <3
CommentAuthorBeckyU98
we are having the Best Man, Dads, Ushers and even grandads matching. H2B is wearing his uniform in the day and then changing into matching suit for the evening. i dont think it really matters but personally i would like them all to match so you can tell they are all part of the bridal party x
CommentAuthorOfficially Mrs M
all mine matched because it was easier to have them matching, most of them got changed in to other outfits in the evening but during the day we had the dad's, ushers, best men and Groom in the same.
I went to my friend wedding tho and she had her groom in a blue suit and all the groomsmen etc in the same suits but with different coloured ties, socks and braces (she has a rainbow theme)
8th September 2012 I married my best friend
1st September 2014 our little family grew by one
Women are made to be loved, not understood. - Oscar Wilde
:)
