When My H2B asked me to marry him (18 months ago) the fisrt thing i said was i wanted My daughter and his two daughters to be BMs....
We asked them straight away, and they was really happy. I have been looking online for dresses that i think would be appropiate for there ages (18, 20, and 20) for the last year, we found a few but it was a case of 2 liking it and the other one not liking it, so we continued looking untill ALL found one dress they liked.
Now as the wedding is on a budget, the girls agreed to pay for their own dresses as they all work Full Time... I have been on at them for the last 4 months when they will have the money to buy them as i really wanted to get then incase theres a problem and they either needed to be returned OR they needed to be adjusted in any way...
Its now 9 weeks to go to the wedding and not one of them have said anything about it... Im worried we are running out of time, but the min i say anything about it, its always I aint got the money etc etc....
I dont see why i should go overdrawn to get the dresses, as i feel if they really wanna be BM they would have got them instead of boozing their money in the Nightclubs..................... !!
Flower girl is now sorted.. What do you think i should do??
CommentAuthorRhiannonollie
just talk to them - tell you how much it means to you to have them as BMs and if you could afford it that you would pay but unfortunetly you cant.
Explain that this is a massive day for you and you want to have them there close to you and hope that they too are happy to be there for you.
Go for the heart strings.
How much are the dresses if you dont mind me asking!?
is soooo happy and lucky
CommentAuthorKazza
I would say to them all if they are not going to move their buts and get the dresses they either wear what you pick and buy for them (which you can sell later) or you will ask someone else to be bridesmaids. As they are at the going out clubbing age I bet they will leave it to the last minute thinking that you are going to pay for the dresses they like.
That's what I would do if it was my girls. x
CommentAuthorMrsd
Id be straight with them, say are you buying the dresses or not? if you cant afford it or dont want to be my bm then say so now as i need to rearrange! be totally honest with them all.
I had to do this with my daughter (14) every single dress i looked at i got a sulky NO, and i mean every dress, so i said righto thats it you either want to be BM or not, im not messing around any longer pick a dress or go without...she picked one straight away!....not one i would of wanted but the kick up bottom did trick. xx
CommentAuthorXLittleMissMe!X
I would say if they don't buy it they will not be walking down the aisle with you and coming as guests. They have had more than enough time to get themselves sorted out. It could be that they are waiting for you to say you will pay for them thinking that you can't have your wedding without them.
Everything is paid for now apart from their dresses, and the dresses they all picked (with my input of course) was £80 each.. thats £240 that i really dont have at this stage of the arrangements... I have told them time n time again, but they say ok ill get it at the end of the month, that was in Feb... March has past, and now they claim that they dontthink they will be able to in April either, so that leaves May.... 3 weeks before my wedding!!!!!
I cant see it happening can you?
CommentAuthorXLittleMissMe!X
No I can't see it either and I would make it clear to them what is going to happen and it is down to them to sort it out. They are old enough to sort themselves out so they either pull their fingers out or get left behind.
CommentAuthorRhiannonollie
£80 Is not much!! They should have been able to save to be able to afford that - To a lot of people thats 2 nights out on the town (to some only one!)
So if they are going out instead of buying the dresses then they are being really rude and ungreatful.
So I agree with some of the other comments here where you say to them - get the dresses by the end of next week or you wont be bridesmaids and I will find someone who really does want to be there for me and cares for me enough to do this one simple thing for me!
is soooo happy and lucky
CommentAuthorUnknown
i would sit them all down and explain because they said they will buy their own you dont have any extra money now and you want them got! tell them they have 2 weeks to get them as pay day is 2 weeks ago! if they dont get them then they arent bm anymore!
it sounds harsh but it sounds like you need to be xx
CommentAuthorStave
Will the dresses still be in stock??? What with all the new stuff coming in and the sales. The last thing you want to have to do is find another new dress.
CommentAuthorTrish Goddard
yes the dresses ARE still in stock.. they are off the bay of e, and i am in contant emailing with the supplier, as when they first chose them, i email straight away and asked if they had their sizes etc... she has put aside all the sizes, but im worryied that she is gonna think im playing her...
Im gonna Fb them all privatly and tell them its now or never...
CommentAuthorMrsOwen
when i was moh for my sister i paid £100 and that was 7 years ago, £80 isnt a lot to pay for a dress, one of our bms refused to pay for her dress so shes not being one anymore, good luck xx
the greatest thing is to love and to be loved in return
CommentAuthorshellay
when we ordered our bridesmaid dresses, they told us it would take 2 months to get them into stock in their sizes and if they needed alterations it would add at least 2 more weeks on top of that, so we ordered ours in february, but they are not coming into the shop until may, and i was concerned that that wouldnt be enough time to sort things out if there were any problems, so you must so stressed with this, i didnt settle till they were ordered. my bridesmaids agreed to pay for theirs, as there was no way that i could pay for them either, i think you need to sit down and talk with them and see if they want to be bridesmaids and stress how you need to get them sorted asap, as shops dont always stock all sizes and colours :) x
I have know my soulmate for 27 years and on the 6th August
I married him and became Mrs Garnham.
It was most definitely the happiest day of my life.
I love married life !!!!
CommentAuthorbecky -mrs firth
yes just tell them straight!!!!
Engaged 27th November 2010
Hen Do Newcastle 2nd June 2012
Marrying the man of my dreams 11th August 2012!
Honeymoon To Jamaica 14th October 2012
CommentAuthorlollilou
Could you buy them then tell your BMs that they have to pay you back at say £20 a week?
