I done a thread yesterday basically saying how I'm really worried about times and people having to travel about so much..
I have a church booked for the ceremony which is the other side of Bristol to my reception venue, it's not a huge problem untill I start thinking about guests that are already travelling across the country to come to the wedding.
The only way I can see things done stress free is for guests to book into a hotel for two nights, get ready at the hotel, drive to the church, from the church to the reception venue and maybe leave there cars so they can drink and get a taxi back to the hotel.
To me it just sounds far too much!
So I've been thinking whether it's best I just cancel the church and have a civil ceremony at my reception venue, it's not 100% what I want but it really would make everything so much easier!
Pics of inside my church and inside my reception venue are above, not sure if that really helps but they are both lovely! Its just not the traditional wedding I've always seen myself having.
Opinions def needed here! xxx
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1.1285321247.3_st-mary-s-bitton.jpg
All of my dreams come true the day I married you, Mr Walker
5.11.11
Remember Remember The 5th of November
CommentAuthorEmsy5000
I would say no you shouldn't cancel people will cope with a bit of trip in a car.
Dyslexic
its spelt wrong
I No! I Now! I Know!!!!!
I am NOW MRS LONSDALE!!
CommentAuthorbecky -mrs firth
lol i am doin the same i think lol civil ceremony room luks just as nice as church hun!!
Engaged 27th November 2010
Hen Do Newcastle 2nd June 2012
Marrying the man of my dreams 11th August 2012!
Honeymoon To Jamaica 14th October 2012
CommentAuthorMrsMelodyWalker
I already have people moaning though, that's the thing. It's still a while away and I have people asking me if I can lay on transport etc so they don't have to travel about so much.. but it's also timings, nothings runs properly with the church ceremony and it'll all be rushed. Ahhhhhh
All of my dreams come true the day I married you, Mr Walker
5.11.11
Remember Remember The 5th of November
CommentAuthorbecky -mrs firth
personally i wud hav it at venue hun, you dont want u or ure guest rushin around, will just make it easier
Engaged 27th November 2010
Hen Do Newcastle 2nd June 2012
Marrying the man of my dreams 11th August 2012!
Honeymoon To Jamaica 14th October 2012
Becky I wouldn't even know how to sort a civil ceremony though or where to start, who to contact :-(
All of my dreams come true the day I married you, Mr Walker
5.11.11
Remember Remember The 5th of November
CommentAuthorbecky -mrs firth
cos they will hav to drop cars off at their hotel before goin to venue
Engaged 27th November 2010
Hen Do Newcastle 2nd June 2012
Marrying the man of my dreams 11th August 2012!
Honeymoon To Jamaica 14th October 2012
CommentAuthorbecky -mrs firth
contact the venue to see if u can hav a civil ceremony there first
Engaged 27th November 2010
Hen Do Newcastle 2nd June 2012
Marrying the man of my dreams 11th August 2012!
Honeymoon To Jamaica 14th October 2012
CommentAuthorHappilymarried Mrs G
You cant please everyone all of the time, your wedding your way and if you want the church then have the church. Your guests should be happy to share your special day with you and would just have to cope. xx
CommentAuthorbecky -mrs firth
then the register office where the venue is u contact for sum1 to cum and do wedding
Engaged 27th November 2010
Hen Do Newcastle 2nd June 2012
Marrying the man of my dreams 11th August 2012!
Honeymoon To Jamaica 14th October 2012
CommentAuthorMrsMelodyWalker
I can have it there, it's already in the contract as they thought I was originally having it there! I rang to tell them I wasnt and they said they will just change it when we go for the menu meeting thing.
Jennebel it does sound do able but with times and everything it seems so stressful.. plus guests will have to go from the church to the hotel before the reception venue if they are only staying one night as they have to be checked in at 2pm no earlier no later. Its a nightmare!
All of my dreams come true the day I married you, Mr Walker
5.11.11
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CommentAuthorMrsMelodyWalker
Our venue isn't a hotel, guests can't stay there, they have to stay a hotel about a 5-10 minute drive away which is another balls up I made. I really didn't think about all this stuff when I booked my venue, I just love it so much and never wanted to get married anywhere else. If no one had moaned I'd never think about changing! I don't really want to make the service any earlier as it's already at 1pm, I'd only end up with people moaning it's right on lunch time! Steve's grandma is diabetic and she has to eat at certain times, if I bring it forward she'd have to have a pack lunch in the church lol. Steve said to find a church closer to the venue but that doesn't help much, I can't just use a church because they are near my venue!
All of my dreams come true the day I married you, Mr Walker
5.11.11
Remember Remember The 5th of November
CommentAuthorMrsMelodyWalker
I have it in an email from the hotel, they have to check in at 2pm to avoid queues at reception as "normal" guests have to check in from 2.30.. maybe I've got it wrong and they can still check in whenever but that's how I'm reading it lol
All of my dreams come true the day I married you, Mr Walker
5.11.11
Remember Remember The 5th of November
CommentAuthormcquire81
Your day, your way hun, however if all this rushing about and moaning from the guests is going to ruin it for you then change, but essentially its up to you and what you want xx
CommentAuthorMrsMelodyWalker
I really don't know, I need someone to just take it out of my hands and say I have no choice either way. I don't think I'm ever going to please everyone and I hate it x
All of my dreams come true the day I married you, Mr Walker
5.11.11
Remember Remember The 5th of November
CommentAuthorMrsMelodyWalker
ceremony is at 1pm, vicar said it lasts 40 minutes, I have no idea how long for photos at the church but I say half hour? so just say that's all done by 2.30, half hour to get to reception venue 3pm, photos at the reception venue? maybe an hour? we have to be at the reception venue an hour before they will call us in for the wedding breakfast so that would make it 4pm 2 hours for that.. 6pm.. an hour to change the room around.. 7pm .. So actually it's not too bad but that's if everything runs smoothly and I've given enough time for photos etc! And if people need to check into the hotel aswell as get to the venue they are going to need alot longer than half hour. And I can't afford to put on transport for everyone, so people have to drive.
All of my dreams come true the day I married you, Mr Walker
5.11.11
Remember Remember The 5th of November
CommentAuthorSijen
Mrs Walker - it's your wedding and if you want a church wedding then do it! I mentioned the other day about my friends wedding last year in Bristol...the majority of us had to travel from Liverpool (where she is from) and her hubby's family / friends had to travel from Cornwall (where he is from) so it took everyone 5 hours + to get there, but we knew this from the start and booked 2 nights in hotel. Drove to the church from the hotel, from the church to the reception venue (which took us another 40 mins coz of roadworks / traffic) then just got cab back the next day to pick up the car...it wasn't an issue and we were prepared to do it because she had warned us about it before hand... she did put a bus on in the evening to take people back to Bristol after the reception though...didn't cost as much as she thought it would and may ease the moans of your guests...
10 years together...
Finally Mr & Mrs
27.07.12
CommentAuthorTrish Goddard
Hey.... Im having a Registry Office Wedding (as its our 2nd)
I have a couple of mates comin from Harrogate (they are coming by train as niether drive) They have booed into a hotel 5 mins from my house, but ceremony is 20 miles away.....
they asked how hey are gonna get there.. i replied "Not my problem" LOL
CommentAuthorMrsMelodyWalker
I'll have a look into costs for a bus to just get them back to the hotel after the reception but I think thats all I'll do, it's costing us over 15k for this wedding and I can't keep forking out more money to please everyone else. H2b has put his foot down, said we aren't cancelling and if guests don't like it they can do one.. only problem is I think it'll be his family that don't like it!! I'm really not giving much time for everything but it's the only way I can see it working, if there is road works and if there is football on that day (my venue is near Bristol City's football ground) then tough, my venue need to just work with us to make it work instead of putting so much pressure on us to keep to times. I'm not superwoman, as much as I like to think I am, I can't make everything simple and perfect at the same time. If I want perfect then there's going to be issues as silly as that sounds!
All of my dreams come true the day I married you, Mr Walker
5.11.11
Remember Remember The 5th of November
CommentAuthorJill
Exactly - you're not superwoman, you cant keep everyone happy and your venue must understand things can end up running a bit late. Just relax and enjoy - if people dont make it because they're not happy about travelling then so be it - they'd probably just complain about the food anyway lol x
29th September 2012
Cant wait to be Mrs D!
CommentAuthorMrsMelodyWalker
I'm never going to win am I? I just need to think about what me and h2b want now and stop fussing over other people. H2b's brother got married in portugal few months back, was amazing best wedding ever, his cousin gets married in August, a huge big posh do.. so I feel like I have these to live up to and if it's no better or on par then I will get the stick for it. My family wouldn't give two damns how it is, they are just over the moon we are getting married. It's a difficult one!! x
All of my dreams come true the day I married you, Mr Walker
5.11.11
Remember Remember The 5th of November
I just can't afford it, not for the day, even if it was only a 100 quid, its 100 quid I don't have at the moment and I feel really angry that I have to pay out more money to please people. If I can get a mini bus for the evening, just to take people back to the hotel and they leave there cars at the venue, I don't mind doing that but that's it. I can't keep spending money on them! It's nearly 100 quid a head for the whole day and including favours food and drink as it is :-( changing venue's would make it cheaper and easier but it's just not what I want xx
All of my dreams come true the day I married you, Mr Walker
5.11.11
Remember Remember The 5th of November
CommentAuthorLiz3yy
I would have what you want, if people have to travel a bit then so be it, it's only for one day after all. Our wedding ceremony and evening do are going to be in completely seperate towns so guests will have to drive, or take taxis.
Can't wait until the day I become Mrs. Johnson :)
CommentAuthorLiz3yy
If you try and please people then it will get messy, please yourself first then worry about everyone else.
Can't wait until the day I become Mrs. Johnson :)
CommentAuthorRoseyB
I went to a friends wedding last year the reception was a half hour drive from the church, they put on coaches but asked guests to pay £5 if they needed a seat on a coach, that was there and back. We just had to let them know we needed a seat so they knew how many to book. No one minded as it was way cheaper than a cab. I've been to lots of weddings where they put on mini buses or taxis but guests payed.
I think you are over thinking it Hun, we all do it and get bogged down in all of it, most hotels allow you to check your bags in early or even do pre arranged early check in, your guests are grown ups they can figure it out. Also a 5/10 min drive is not a bad distance from your reception venue at all, it's pretty good in fact. They don't need babying as long as they are aware of everything before hand and it's not a surprise there really isn't a problem xx
CommentAuthorsarahuttley2b-[keera
people prob wouldnt mind,we went to a wedding quite far away from us and it involved a lot of travelling and taxis and over night stay.go with what makes you happy as the people who matter will make sure they are a part of your day no matter how awkward it may be.xx
i sarah louise duncan do take thee daniel paul uttley to be
my AWFULL wedded husband!!!!!!!!!!!!!lol
my heart is overwellmed with the love i feel for him,
my life,my love,my soulmate...forever.xxx
CommentAuthorshellay
we are having a civil ceremony and i think it will be just as nice a day as a church, but its a case of what does the church side of it mean to you, are you marrying there because of religious reasons or just because you are getting married, if its just a place to get married then the civil ceremony will be just as nice, and i find that its easier just to have it all in one place, but thats just my preference, i am sure that all your guests will be happy to go from the church to the venue if that is what is planned for your day, its your special day and you have to follow your heart and do what will make you and your h2b's special day :) x
I have know my soulmate for 27 years and on the 6th August
I married him and became Mrs Garnham.
It was most definitely the happiest day of my life.
I love married life !!!!
CommentAuthorbarbie86
Are you marrying in the Church for religious reasons? If not, I would have the ceremony at the venue; personally, I find it hypocritical to marry in church if you're not religious and don't regularly attend mass, it doesn't sit comfortably with me; this is why I've refused point-blank to entertain a religious ceremony, even though my parents are Catholic and my OHs mum and grandmother Protestant. I know people will disagree, I just don't think you should marry in a church because it's a 'nice venue', that's not what a church wedding should be about IMO.
If you are religious or have strong religious reasons for marrying in a church, then I would still do it in the church, and just try not to stress about guests, they will work it out, believe me, and won't get nearly so stressed over it as you will :-) People travelling a long distance will either set off early, or book accommodation for the previous night; you can get Travel Lodges and the like really cheap so I really wouldn't worry. If however you don't have any religious reasons, then personally, I don't see the point in making your guests travel across town..
CommentAuthorLuce21
Hunny- Do wat you want. Years ago everyone did the church wedding and then onto a reception. People may have got abit 'used' to it all under one roof. But how did they ever cope years ago!! They just did it.
I am having a church followed by reception. Granted there isnt a great distance to travel inbewteen BUt its still a 10min car journey. So they will have to drive. TBH- Its my dream to be married in the church- So no matter how far away the reception was- i would do it anyway!!
Dont cancel your dream hun if your heart is set on the church. People will cope!! Esp if you tell them in advance! xx
CommentAuthorMrsMelodyWalker
Im getting married in a church for all the right reasons, as I've already said h2b mentioned using a different church closer to the venue and I said I wouldn't do that as if I was going to change then it would have to a civil ceremony, it's either MY church or no church.
All of my dreams come true the day I married you, Mr Walker
5.11.11
Remember Remember The 5th of November
CommentAuthorMrsMelodyWalker
Thanks Luce, that's really helped. I'm not going to cancel, people will have to do what I want to do just for one day. I really can't see myself getting married anywhere but my church and it really upsets me to think people can moan at me so much that I thought about not getting married there. It's my wedding, should be my way. My dream! I'm sure it'll work out fine, I just need to focus on myself and Steve, no one else! xxx
All of my dreams come true the day I married you, Mr Walker
5.11.11
Remember Remember The 5th of November
CommentAuthorLuce21
Well done you mrs walker 2be. I am so pleased to hear your not going to change the church. I couldnt marry anywhere else. I feel the same---my church or no church. Its your dream...you only do this once...live your dream love. People will understand. xx
CommentAuthorMel D
If you really want the church wedding you should have it. We had to travel to Manchester for a wedding, then 3/4 hour to the church, then another 3/4 to the reception venue. There was no question that we would, and it wasn't a bother at all. You should do want you want to do.
Got married Sat 28/05/2011
Renewing vows Sat 29/05/2021
We're planning WELL in advance!!
CommentAuthorMrsMelodyWalker
H2b said I need to stop thinking about the guests and just think about us.. he said think of the wedding as having no guests and it's just the two of us there and your arranging this wedding the way we want it and the way it will please us. He's so right! It's going to be my church, my way! Thank you ever so much girls, everyones advice has really helped. xxx
All of my dreams come true the day I married you, Mr Walker
5.11.11
Remember Remember The 5th of November
CommentAuthorsarahuttley2b-[keera
exactly its your day and as people are alredy travelling whats a little further as long as your happy they should be willing to make the effort.x
i sarah louise duncan do take thee daniel paul uttley to be
my AWFULL wedded husband!!!!!!!!!!!!!lol
my heart is overwellmed with the love i feel for him,
my life,my love,my soulmate...forever.xxx
CommentAuthorMrsMelodyWalker
Yeah, definitely. I have to stop "being so nice" lol xx
All of my dreams come true the day I married you, Mr Walker
5.11.11
Remember Remember The 5th of November
CommentAuthorsarahuttley2b-[keera
yep unfortunatly with weddings you cant please everyone,and its one day your not going to be able to repeat so please yourself as your the one that matters.xx
i sarah louise duncan do take thee daniel paul uttley to be
my AWFULL wedded husband!!!!!!!!!!!!!lol
my heart is overwellmed with the love i feel for him,
my life,my love,my soulmate...forever.xxx
CommentAuthorMrsMelodyWalker
Thanks hun! I don't know what I'd do without this site. xxx
All of my dreams come true the day I married you, Mr Walker
5.11.11
Remember Remember The 5th of November
CommentAuthorshellay
for once you have to be selfish and think of yourselves and no one else, they wouldnt change things for you, so just do what you want and no one else :) x
I have know my soulmate for 27 years and on the 6th August
I married him and became Mrs Garnham.
It was most definitely the happiest day of my life.
I love married life !!!!
CommentAuthorSijen
I agree with everyone ha! At the end of the day it is YOUR day, you do not need the added stress of trying to please everyone and it'll only end up causing problems between you and your H2B.
If people really want to be a part of YOUR day then they will make the effort to travel and wouldn't even dream of you footing the bill... Of course it's nice to pay for everything for everyone, but in these times when most of us are paying our own weddings (without help) every penny does count and £100 for a wedding is sometimes just the same as £1000, even an extra tenner is just as bad when you haven't got the spare funds! I know exactly how you feel hun.
And regarding your venue...s0d them...they have to cater for your needs and make you feel as relaxed and stress-free as possible...how many weddings do you go to where the caterers are running late? Don't let it get you down xx
10 years together...
Finally Mr & Mrs
27.07.12
CommentAuthorXLittleMissMe!X
I think you have made the right choice as it is your day and people can car share etc to get from A to B.
CommentAuthorVicky
I think not canceling the church for a civil service is good, that church looks amazing, although my friend is getting married in a really pretty church over the suspension bridge quite near your reception - could be a option if you wanted something closer. But if your church means something then let the guests just sort themselves out
CommentAuthorMrsMelodyWalker
I really couldn't cancel the church just to use a church closer, that church will mean nothing to me. The church I'm using has family history. But I think I know what church you mean and it is lovely, although I think they are all lovely! If I was to cancel I'd use Ashton Court for a civil but I just can't see myself doing it. I just have to stick with what Ive got, its what I want and just let the guests sort it out themselves lol xx
All of my dreams come true the day I married you, Mr Walker
5.11.11
Remember Remember The 5th of November
CommentAuthorVicky
Good choice.. I think you need a church we a bit of meaning. I bet you we be so happy when you walk down that isle is stunning xx
CommentAuthorMrsMelodyWalker
Its blue too lol matches my colour scheme haha naughty Melody shouldn't think of it like that ;-) x
All of my dreams come true the day I married you, Mr Walker
5.11.11
Remember Remember The 5th of November
CommentAuthornini
I went to a wedding where the civil venue was a 40 minute drive across London to the reception venue. We got lost and drove round for 2 hours!! But it was all ok in the end. You can't please everyone and you will make yourself miserable trying. Just give clear directions, with a map, and let people sort themselves out, they are adults after all!
CommentAuthorsarahuttley2b-[keera
i know what u mean the support on this site is a godsend.xx
i sarah louise duncan do take thee daniel paul uttley to be
my AWFULL wedded husband!!!!!!!!!!!!!lol
my heart is overwellmed with the love i feel for him,
my life,my love,my soulmate...forever.xxx
CommentAuthorTinkerbell
xxx
Love my Gorgeous George xxx
CommentAuthormcewan07
i wouldn't change it. My venue is a good 20-35 minute drive from the church - the church i sin kilmarnock the venue in ayr. Also i am not putting on transport, if people want to come they will put up with it. If they want to drink they will either need to get a hotel room within walking distance or get public transport