Ok so my fiancé's sister is a lovely girl, she has a little boy the same age as mine and we get on fine. Her partner on the other hand is not. I considered him family almost immediately even though he'd only been around a few months. Since his son was born he's been a totally useless father but that's not the point.
The point is bil is a mechanic and offered to look at my brother's car, I thought that was really kind and that I could trust himq and bil needed the money so I agreed and my brother and my bil agreed on a price of £500 and bil took the car into his garage that he owns with his father.
A week later the car still isn't ready but we didn't rush bil because it wasn't urgent to get the car back at this time. Later we find out from a friend, another mechanic working in that garage that he had overheard my bil on the phone offering my brothers car to someone for 1500 and telling said person that the car only needed a new timing belt (which was the original and only problem) I didn't take action because I considered bil family and thought my friend must have made a mistake and left it at that.
The next day my bil phoned my brother and told him that unfortunately all the engine cylinders had burst and that he would take the car as scrap off his hands for £500 (the car is an Audi tt) my brother rang me very disheartened that his car was in such a bad state and I advised him of what I heard, I told him to just take the car back and we would ask our dad to take a look first. When we got the car bak my dad replaced the timing belt and checked the engine cylinders/valves which were all intact and the car was working fine. It cost my dad a lot less than the price my bil gave to us but my brother was willing to just give him the £500 for his time and parts.
So bil had lied and tried to thieve my brother by tricking him into giving bil a perfectly good car that bil would then immediately sell on for a huge profit then I hear he successfully pulled this scam on his own grandfather. I don't want him anywhere near me or my family because he is dishonest and I hate him, but my mil is kicking off big time saying it's out of order to not invite him to the wedding and that I'm being precious about my brother because he can 'afford' 1k and that bil was desperate for money for the baby and needs it more than my brother... (bil and sil live at home with my pil...) but you don't steal from anyone especially not family so why does she think what he did is ok? Am I really out of order?
eru, shiteiru ka? shinigami wa ringo shika tabenai?
^_^
CommentAuthorClarabella
I dont think you are out of order. Its your day and it doesnt matter if someone can or cant afford to loose out on 1k. I wouldnt want him at my wedding if i was you either. You never know what he might steal right from under your noses.
At the end of the day what he was doing was stealing and no matter how much you decorate it and make it look pretty it still comes down to him stealing
Started losing weight last year 22/1/11 - 13 Stone 12 pounds
Lost this week 2lbs ;0)
Weighs as of 29/9/12 10 stone 12 lbs
CommentAuthorMrs T Hurley!
OMG how awful! I personally would've called the police if that happened to me or my family! Don't invite him and if your Mum still insists, then tell her that you're worried he might steal from you or your guests. It's your day...
Met 18/09/03
Engaged 06/09/08
Getting married 05/09/17
CommentAuthorTsukijin
I'd love to call the police on him but unfortunately it's our word against his. I've got a friend who is a copper though so he's going to put the frighteners on him for me because taking a car as scrap, filling the form in as scrapped and then selling it on to drive is illegal and could have got my brother into a lot of trouble with the DVLA for improper disposal or failure to change ownership or something
eru, shiteiru ka? shinigami wa ringo shika tabenai?
^_^
CommentAuthorxnikki86x
I know how you feel hun, one of my really close aunts has a partner that in the easiest term is a waste of space and my OH hates his guts aswell so when we announced we were getting married I point blank told her he wasn't invited. She was fine with it and her and her kids are still coming and can't wait. At the end of the day like everyone keeps telling me its our day we do what we want and have whoever we want to have there. x
Mil text me earlier saying "if you don't invite bil, then sil, me and fil won't come either" Sounds harsh but I text her back "if he comes, he sits between my 2 brothers. Do yoU still want him to come?" Would be hilarious to watch him squirm :D
eru, shiteiru ka? shinigami wa ringo shika tabenai?
^_^
CommentAuthormummy2Olivia_Lisa
lmao ooooh stick to that hunny!!! i love it..... x x
6 n a half weeks scan!!!!!! x x x
CommentAuthorMrsCaitiClarke
That's brilliant - put the frighteners on him! What he did was completely disgusting. Thank goodness u found out though else you and h2b would be seriously out of pocket. There's no way I'd have someone like that at our wedding, like the other ladies said you'd just be worried about what kind of trick he was going to pull all the time. Xx
I can't wait to marry the love of my life - 28/04/2012
OCD Bride - it's all in the details!
CommentAuthorNicsquared
Its not just stealing its also fraud Id stick to your guns as well - Im sure lots of people could do with the money but they get by with what they have got and dont resort to stealing
There are so many people out there who will tell you
what you can't do.
What you have to do is turn around and say, "watch me"!!
CommentAuthorSweetchilli
I can't believe he actually wants to go to your weeding knowing what he did and everyone knowing about it. How thick is he? I think your idaa of sitting him in between your brothers is brilliant. What a creep.
CommentAuthorclive
No way are you out of order!! One cannot alter the fact that what your bil tried to was corrupt and illegal, and is a criminal offence. Your mil is just as bad for sticking up for him, so in my opinion, that's two less mouths to feed.
CommentAuthorTsukijin
I think it's more of a case that sil is mummys favourite. Bil is lucky that my brothers are calm and mature or bil wouldn't have been able to walk to the wedding anyway! I've sat him between my two brothers, opposite my 2 nice bils and mr officer:D each and every one of them knows what he did and boy will he feel uncomfortable but mil didn't say I had to seat him nicely did she
eru, shiteiru ka? shinigami wa ringo shika tabenai?
^_^
CommentAuthorClarabella
she shouldnt be dictating who comes and who doesnt come in the first place what a cheek
Started losing weight last year 22/1/11 - 13 Stone 12 pounds
Lost this week 2lbs ;0)
Weighs as of 29/9/12 10 stone 12 lbs
CommentAuthorJilly17
wow what a situation to be in! You have not mentionned what your h2b thinks and I am a bit confused why he is not dealing with it all when it is his family making all the problems? He should be dealing with his brother and mum and not letting you take all the grief from them! Love your idea of seating him on your family table though...I would love to be a fly on the wall if he did have the nerve to turn up! ha ha
CommentAuthortimpson123
Tell her not to come then. I would be absolutely fuming. What does H2B say?
CommentAuthorKaili&James
Oh my word!! Talk about complicated. Its easy for any of us to say that he's not invited but there would be womeone in my family that would say they weren't coming if he didn't so I can see why you made that compromise. Brilliant idea of where to seat him too. I cannot beleive he has the cheek to act like everything is fine!! He must have done this loads of times before if he is so calm about being found out on this occasion!! Hope he gets found out doing it again (obviously not for the person he does it to) but just so that he can be caught and reported. There is more than your word against his because of your brother and the other person at the garage who told you that he was trying to sell it. If this person overheard the call how much else has he heard?? He was obviously aware of the whole thing otherwise he wouldnt have contacted you to tell you what he had heard.
Completely agree with Jilly17 too.. What does your h2b think about it all??? xxx
CommentAuthorTsukijin
Me and oh are very much united and she completely ignores him he has told mil in no uncertain terms that he hates bil and that he's annoyed that mil took his side and is effectively condoning his stealing. I can't stand her anyway, she prioritizes my sil son and spoils him, and doesn't care about my son. Sil son received a jumparoo for his 6 month mark and my son received one, yes one single vest, that she found in her attic...but that's another story lol
eru, shiteiru ka? shinigami wa ringo shika tabenai?
^_^
CommentAuthorMrsowen2b
oh my word tsuki she isnt a very nice women and he isnt a very nice man!!! :(
sooo sorry for u!
xx
CommentAuthorMadam Butterfly
No way would I have him there. Why should you have someone there on your happy day that will cause tension and cause you to feel unhappy. I don't know why people think weddings are an excuse to get everyone you never talk to together! Its the ones you care about and trust that should be there. Good luck x
You To Me Are Everything
The Sweetest Song That I Could Sing
Oh Baby
16th June 2012 x
CommentAuthor♥Future Mrs Midgley♥
Oh my god that is unbelievable. I am glad that your fiancé is with you on this. It must be really difficult for you both. If it was me, I would not have him there at all. He doesn't deserve to share your happy day. This is YOUR day and you should be totally happy and relaxed. As for you mil, I am astounded. I don't think she should be there either. If she hasn't treated you both like family why should she come? Weddings are meant to be a time of togetherness and love, not favouritism. But then again it is easy for me to say that as I am not in your shoes. Best of luck hun. X
CommentAuthorTsukijin
This just came to a head, sil rang to insist we invited her partner. My OH gave her a straight no and explained why. Sil called my brother a liar and said some bloody nasty things about him said she wasn't coming and told my OH that she never wanted to see him again.
Now I have 2 free spaces to offer to someone that deserves them :)
eru, shiteiru ka? shinigami wa ringo shika tabenai?
^_^
CommentAuthorFutureMrsPite
omg! how ***** dare they! i cant believe ur bil would do such a thing and still expect to be invited and also for mil to condone it! it seems to me that ur better off without them there! i would have def said he isnt coming and if u and sil and anyone else for that matter doesnt want to come then fine suit urselves! cannot believe they think its ok for what he done just because he needs money for his child, surely mil could help out with that since she seems to favour them!
u and h2b stick to ur guns, its ur wedding and its ur choice who is there, not anyone elses and certainly not ppl who r happy to rip u or ur family off for the sake of extra money! some ppl!! x
As the beatles say, Love Is All You Need x
CommentAuthorjo Santa
If your h2b is in agreement with you, I would refuse to have him and weather the storm. Sounds like SIl could end up with prison visits in her monthly schedule if she stays with him. If he comes to the wedding, there'll be bad feeling between him and your family. If he doesn't, then it'll be between you and h2b's family, so I'd stick with the principle.
Jo Santa
CommentAuthorRockabilly chick
Wow, what a scumbag. It doesnt matter how skint you are you dont steal from people! I am skint most of the time but I've never stolen anything and I never would. Im glad your H2B is agreeing with you.
Did the sister or this guy even apologise? If they say that its being made up then you can quite easily prove them wrong. All you have to do is tell them you had the car checked elsewhere and its only the timing belt that needed sorted. And they said he your brother can afford it? How dare they. I would be absolutely fuming.
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CommentAuthorkerriface
At least the problem just solved itself! If they don't want to come it's their loss. It's not like you're going to miss someone you didn't want there anyway!x
CommentAuthorTsukijin
We did get a written quotation from Audi listing the real faults before my dad started on the car which I'm keeping because if he says anything else about my brother I will give it to trading standards and inform the coppers that he deliberately insists on over the weekend stays for cars he likes the look of, then he takes them home for the weekend even though he has no insurance of his own. Neither of them apologized and said that my brother was "only mad because he prefers to spend his money on crack" (NoT true and that really hit a nerve with me) so I told her that with his thieving it looked more like it was her partner that had a habit to hide. His response was that this is the thanks he gets from trying to do someone a favodur - yeah, himself.
Anyway it now means I can invite people I trust and that I want there :)
eru, shiteiru ka? shinigami wa ringo shika tabenai?
^_^
CommentAuthorRockabilly chick
Call the police, I think the guy deserves it. I work for a reputable garage and what he is doing is absolutely disgusting. I know its hard for you because he is attached to your mans sister but the guy deserves his comeupance (however you spell that lol). I suppose its not that simple when its family but this guy sounds like a total pr1ck.
Does your mans sister not feel embarrassed about this? If my other half did anything like that, I'd be raging at him. I would be so embarrassed.
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CommentAuthor♥Future Mrs Midgley♥
Good on you girl, you are better off without them both there. I would also report him to the police to stop him doing it again to someone else. If he can find it that easy to cheat and steal from his own family, then it will mean nothing for him to do the same to a stranger. x
