Having a bit of a moment sorry ladies.... Had an rsvp back today from h2bs great aunt who is in her 80s and lives in southampton and she sent the loveliest letter that thanked us and said she's looking forward to comin.... Now.. had an rsvp from my cousin on behalf of her, her sister and my aunt and uncle, they live about 30 min if that from the church, I'm paying my aunt over £300 for her to do my wedding cake and they've said they will be going to the evening nothing about the ceremony. Now to me they just cant be bothered as when I told then where the church is the first thing they said was ' why all the way down there, why didn't u go for the church up the road' I responded that I want a CofE church Not a united reformed church that's on a busy main road, no parking, main bus route and I dont want complete strangers watching me outside.the church.if I wanted that I would have had that church. I'm now debating do I still get the cake from her or go somewhere else? My arguement is, were family and she's charging the same as she would some random couple and why Shud I pay her over £300 if she cant even be bothered to be there at the ceremony?
caught the catch of my lifetime
25.05.2013. best day of my life
CommentAuthormadhen
Wow, that's a bit of a kick in the teeth isn't it. I don't want to tell you to go somewhere else and just fall out with your aunt or whatever, but all I'll say is H2b's two aunts are making our cake and we don't have to pay anything, it's our wedding present. I think you should maybe sleep on it, have a bit of a think before doing anything. But having said that, I'd be offended in that situation too :(
CommentAuthorkimi1987
Were Not particularly close. I see her probably once a year and that's if I bump into her. My dad suggested going to her for the cake as even he thought it would be cheaper
caught the catch of my lifetime
25.05.2013. best day of my life
CommentAuthormadhen
Ah well then I wouldn't worry too much. You can always say your budget won't stretch to that so unfortunately you'll have to go somewhere else. On the other hand maybe the fact you're not so close is why they're only going to the evening? Though that's a bit silly as you've invited them so clearly you wanted them there.
CommentAuthorkimi1987
I was thinkin maybe ask her if she cud do it cheaper. if she says.no then ill say ill have to go else where
caught the catch of my lifetime
25.05.2013. best day of my life
Yeah you could do that, because it still gives her a chance to compromise, but also gives you a way out if she won't :)
CommentAuthorRachaelC80
Oohhhh dear?? £300 does sound rather dear for a relative to make it?? I have my Mums friends, daughter making ours who I don't know?? And, she's not charging me..... Would think it'll probably save us about £80. I'd think about going somewhere else and just settling for them to turn up in the evening??
Obviously, it's your call but take the less stress route!!! :-)
CommentAuthormadhen
Yeah I think it's quite a lot to charge family....unless it's eight tiers tall or something, then maybe I'd sort of understand it!!
CommentAuthorkimi1987
It's a basic 3 tier cake and she's making a bride and groom for.on top
caught the catch of my lifetime
25.05.2013. best day of my life
CommentAuthormadhen
Nyeh, I think that's expensive. Try talking to her to see if you can reach a compromise, but maybe have look out for alternatives at the same time :)
CommentAuthorMrsGothBride
I agree in that I think its a lot to pay a relative. My MIL to be is making ours and refusing to even let us pay for the ingredients!
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5th September 2013
CommentAuthorMrs Ross
gosh my cake is 310 and thats from a bakers!!!
CommentAuthorJillianL47
She's most definately charging too much for your cake. Ours is £300 for a professional 3 tier cake, which involves inticate sugar paste flowers.
CommentAuthorBobsi
That's a tad expensive especially for a relative. Have you spoken to his great aunt to ask what she is doing?
X
Got together June 11th 2006
Getting married June 11th 2014
8 years to the day and I'll be Mrs T.
CommentAuthorsarah
Umm... to put a different spin on it at least you'll be saving on their meals. Also generally you don't RSVP for the ceremony so their is a chance they'll go to the ceremony and only attend the night do.
CommentAuthorkimi1987
Were.Not having a sit down meal, just a hog roast on the evening. Everyone who has rsvp has said there either going to both or just the night. I just know they won't be there. It's too much effort for them to drive there. It's just.annoying that h2bs family are driving 2-3 hours to be there but my family won't drive 30 mins down the road
caught the catch of my lifetime
25.05.2013. best day of my life
CommentAuthorGillianE
that's a little expensive for a relative to make your cake. before you decide on anything though definately sleep on it and then maybe have a chat with her.
xx
CommentAuthorkimi1987
Just had a chat with a lady who does cakes. She can do one for £200-£250 I just have to speak to h2b about it. Might go and see my aunt and see if she can reduce the price a little. Even if it.means Not having personalized cake topped. If i go to someone else I wont get that anyway.
caught the catch of my lifetime
25.05.2013. best day of my life
CommentAuthorsarah
Oh, I see. Hmm, tbh I would tell her that you can't afford the cake any more and see if she can't drop the price. If not go with the lady you found.
CommentAuthorShirleygirly
My cake is £247 including delivery charges, I would have to say thanks but no thanks to a relative who offers to make it for an inflated charge. The only think she has to pay for is the materials the labour should be a labour of love for a family member. I would definitely consider the baker route because she's is taking advantage of your good nature charging you that much.
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CommentAuthorkimi1987
Thanks ladies, I'm just waiting for h2b to get home from work so I can talk to him about it. The lady I found on Facebook gives away a box of cup cakes with every consultation so I think h2b will go just for them lol
caught the catch of my lifetime
25.05.2013. best day of my life
CommentAuthorsarah
Yay! For free cupcakes ;)
CommentAuthorBobsi
Cheaper than your aunt and free cakes. Im sold :) x
Got together June 11th 2006
Getting married June 11th 2014
8 years to the day and I'll be Mrs T.
CommentAuthorGillianE
that's a good price for the cake lady.
xx
CommentAuthorkimi1987
H2b agrees that's better than the £300 my aunt wants. When.I spoke to her she asked me Not to let her down with having the cake with her but after hearing she's only going on the evening as far as I'm concerned she's let my family down on most important day of my life
caught the catch of my lifetime
25.05.2013. best day of my life
CommentAuthorOfficially Mrs M
i think thats expensive kimi for a relative to do it
we paid £450 for our 4 tier cake from a bakery
i would think about looking elsewhere hun if she can't be bothered to make the effort to come 30 mins out of her way to see you get married!
8th September 2012 I married my best friend
1st September 2014 our little family grew by one
Women are made to be loved, not understood. - Oscar Wilde
CommentAuthorkimi1987
The lady does 4 tier cakes from 275 so could possibly even have 1 of them for the price my aunt wants
caught the catch of my lifetime
25.05.2013. best day of my life
CommentAuthorOfficially Mrs M
sounds like you've made your mind up hun
8th September 2012 I married my best friend
1st September 2014 our little family grew by one
Women are made to be loved, not understood. - Oscar Wilde
CommentAuthorsita_meena
edited
Hi I make cakes for a living and even I don't charge that much for a basic 3 tier!
CommentAuthorkimi1987
Update: Made an appointment today for next Friday so will hopefully have it all sorted by then
caught the catch of my lifetime
25.05.2013. best day of my life
CommentAuthorsarah
That's great, I hope it all works out for you x
CommentAuthorOfficially Mrs M
fingers crossed hun
8th September 2012 I married my best friend
1st September 2014 our little family grew by one
Women are made to be loved, not understood. - Oscar Wilde
CommentAuthorsita_meena
fingers crossed for you here too xx
CommentAuthorMrsManiatt
Hope it all gets sorted for you! (im personally tempted to get a cheapy one from a big american supermarket to save the hassle of my MIL!) xxx
CommentAuthorkimi1987
Thanks ladies.I did look into getting a cake from marks & spens but after reading the measurements decided against it.
caught the catch of my lifetime
25.05.2013. best day of my life
