Wedding Forum - Why be late for your own wedding? - Page 1

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  1.  
    • ringerone
      CommentAuthorringerone
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    OK, I have a question. When I got married last year, I made sure that I was walking through the door as the clock struck the hour. My sister did the same at her wedding. Why is it though, that some brides feel that they have to be late for their wedding especially when it is in church?

    I ask this question from the other side of the fence, as a member of a church choir. Over the years I, and many others have had to wait around so many times and I have been in choirs where some members simply will not sing at weddings anymore due to the lengthy delays. A few years ago, the day before my sisters wedding, I was singing at another wedding where the bride was an hour late. There was no reason for it (she hadn't even left home until 30 minutes after the wedding should have started) and no apology and she hung around outside having her photo taken as well. As I had a hair appointment for my sisters wedding I had to leave after the first hymn. Yesterday, I was at another wedding, where she the bride was late. This time it was only 10 minutes, but it still made me late for the charity event that I was taking part in after. There seems to be no acknowledgement that there are alot of people hanging around waiting for you and giving up a good proportion of their Saturday (usually) to help brides make their wedding day special. Its not just the choir, but the vicar, verger, organist, bellringers etc. I know that all of these people get paid for their services, but by the time that money has been split between them and the choir fund/bell fund and so on, £10 for losing 2 1/2 hours of your day isn't very much. I also don't actually do it for the money either and many of us will give our money back tot he funds.

    I really have a bit of a plea. Yes, it is your special day, we all try to make it as special as possible for you both and you will never see a grumpy, impatient face on me at least. But, please try to think, does being late make it any more special. After months of planning in a military style, are you likely to need to be late. It's not our special day though and we do have other things to be doing once the bride and groom are partying the night away.
  2.  
    • *KelBel*
      CommentAuthor*KelBel*
      Is poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I class the time of the wedding starting as the being late part as all the guests are there a good twenty mins before the bride anyway... I would never dream of being an hr later than that....I'm gonna be going thru those doors at 1pm!!

    Members signature icon
    Velcro...my wedding day twinny! The Two Kel's!
    Got engaged 14/10/12 in Central Park NYC!
    Became Mrs Macdonald 13th September 2014
    Mummy to 4 girlies and baby blue boy Due 10/05/2016
  3.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    I don't plan to be late! I hate tardiness! If I'm late it'll be because we get stuck in traffic because I will be leaving from my parents who are not far from me but we're a long way from the church. The car company know different back routes though to avoid going 5 junctions on the M25.

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  4.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    I reckon a few of my mates will be late for the wedding and walk in after I've walked down the aisle!

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  5.  
    • barbie86
      CommentAuthorbarbie86
      Is poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I'm with you; I don't get it, at all.

    TBH I think there are very few excuses which I'd deem acceptable, because when planning, people should allow for unexpected delays.

    Our ceremony is at 1pm, and I'll be meeting with the registrar at 12.45pm. My hair and make-up artists will arrive at 9am, and this should take 1.5 hours in total; allowing for slippage, I should comfortably be ready by 11.15am. I will then get into my dress for midday, and will start making my way over to the venue (a 2 minute walk away) once I have the 'all clear' from the best man to say that all guests are seated (we are asking guests to be seated between 12 and 12.15, again allowing for slippage/latecomers). The aim is to leave the hotel at 12.30pm, allowing 15 minutes to walk to the venue, and thus giving time for a few photos along the way. I will comfortably be there for 12.45, and the ceremony will definitely be underway by 1pm.

    It isn't rocket science, and I do find it very rude to arrive late, and really feel like there's no excuse.
  6.  
    • LauraJo87
      CommentAuthorLauraJo87
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    I agree... I hate it when the bride is deliberately late as a guest, let alone somebody who is providing a service. I am planning to be bang on time for my wedding, and if I was late I would be quite apologetic xx

    My Beating Heart Belongs To You
    30 August 2013

    The First Day Of My Happily Ever After
  7.  
    • Mrs T. 2 Be
      CommentAuthorMrs T. 2 Be
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
      edited
     
    I dont get this either. If your guests can make it on time surely you can!?

    Plus .... I wouldnt want to feel stressed about everything else running behind time!

    Members signature icon
    Started Dating: 25th September 2005
    Engaged: 26th September 2012
    Getting Married: 25th May 2014
  8.  
    • ringerone
      CommentAuthorringerone
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    The only funny bit with the one who was an hour late was that one of her bridesmaids zip had broken in the porch of the church but that was still fixed before the bride showed her face. I have known an organist go out to a bride who was hanging around outside when she was 20 minutes late and tell her that she had 5 minutes to get in or the choir were leaving. I think he put it a bit more politely than that though.

    I get that there are totally bombshell unexpected delays and am all on board for helping out with the unavoidable. We would have found a safety pin for the poor girl.
  9.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
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    Also, I couldn't do it to H2B, poor guy will be as nervous as anything so I don't want to torture him xx

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  10.  
    • MrsGothBride
      CommentAuthorMrsGothBride
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    I think its really rude........and completely unfair on the groom!!

    Members signature icon
    When we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours
    we join up with them and fall into mutually satisfying
    weirdness and call it love, true love.
    5th September 2013
  11.  
    • Velcro
      CommentAuthorVelcro
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    il be there on time as i dont want to end up feeling rushed or fall behind on times. i think its rude to make people wait.

    Members signature icon

    Wibbly wobbly, timey wimey
    *Kelbel* is my wedding twinny!
  12.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
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    Anything that involves me organising it is planned down to the second and I always build in "delay" time. My dad once described going on holiday with me as like going on holiday run with military precision. I'll be really upset if I'm late and I'm be doubly upset if any of my guests are late. It's just plain rude.

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  13.  
    • higginszajac
      CommentAuthorhigginszajac
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    I shall be there on time, its rude keeping people waiting xx




  14.  
    • Bev
      CommentAuthorBev
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Lateness stresses me out so I will certainly be on time! x
  15.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
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    I know I'll totally be stressing if I'm running late! I'd rather arrive early then wait around the corner in the car until the time I'm supposed to arrive x

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  16.  
    • Glitterfairy
      CommentAuthorGlitterfairy
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    I have a bit of an OCD with timing, I have to get there on time or early. When I got married, I had to be in on time as well. I was so not keeping my guests waiting. We did go to a wedding though where the bride was over and hour late, drama queen!

    Members signature icon
    Our wedding day - 6 October 2012


  17.  
    • carnally
      CommentAuthorcarnally
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    This absolutely does my head in. Personally I think it's the height of rudeness to show up late for your own wedding. You've invited your guests, they've made the effort to be on time and you should not keep them waiting. I will be on time, might even be early
  18.  
    • almost a year wife!!
      CommentAuthoralmost a year wife!!
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    I HATE lateness and I will be at our church at 1355 ready for 1400!!! If its genuiene then there's not much that can be done but it's sheer rudeness when done on purpose x

    Members signature icon
    Ill marry my hero


  19.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     


    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  20.  
    • CommentAuthorRachaelC80
      BadgeBadge
     
    In agreement with you all, it's very rude!!!
    On my Wedding Info sheet that I sent out, I specifically put that all guests were to arrive 20 minutes before.
    I WILL be walking down the aisle at 12 and if anyone is late they'll have to miss the Wedding??!!

    :-)
  21.  
    • AmyK
      CommentAuthorAmyK
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
      edited
     
    Well, it's not as if she didn't have the time and date booked in her diary..! No excuse to be late unless there was a problem at home, and even if there had been, she should've been running up the path into the church - I know I would be! Red faced & sweaty or not, I'll be there on time come heck or high water!! I would even commandeer a push bike if I had to!
    Hmm... Maybe that sounded a *bit* too crazy...? Lol!




  22.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    I've asked people to arrive half an hour before and be seated 15 mins before 13:30.
    I know I will be on time unless something unfortunate happens!

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  23.  
    • sarah
      CommentAuthorsarah
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Sometimes they just want to make ya sweat a little... tbh I don't really expect weddings to run on time and I'm always pleasantly surprised when they do. An hour is out of order, but I wouldn't even think about things running late until 15 mins past the appointed time.
    That said I personally hate being late to anything and plan to arrive on time, no dramatic late entry for me x




  24.  
    • Joanna
      CommentAuthorJoanna
      Is poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadge
     
    At our church, we get a fine if we're too late because of the vicar/organist etc time but also because if there is a wedding after yours, you're pushing their wedding back and that's not fair

    The greatest thing you'll ever learn
    is just to love and be loved in return
  25.  
    • MrsC
      CommentAuthorMrsC
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Its nice to see so many brides with the same attitude. I thinks its terrible when a bride thinks its in her rights to be really late. Its not, its rude.
    I know with how some of our guests are there is a chance they will come in after me.

    Members signature icon
    Proud to be a Wife and Mum
    Married 4th May 2013

  26.  
    • natalie2614
      CommentAuthornatalie2614
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    I was 10 minutes early to my wedding. The registrar said we couldn't be married if we were late so I made sure I was on time! I hate lateness and find it downright rude for the guests if the bride keeps them waiting xx

    Married my best friend 05.04.2013


  27.  
    • Sazzell23
      CommentAuthorSazzell23
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Speaking from the other side of the fence......
    I was about 25 mins late in total for my wedding and it wasnt intentional in the slightest. My car was late collecting me after dropping the bridesmaids off (I couldnt afford 2 cars). I was ready to go and pacing my hallway with the clock ticking away and I couldnt do a thing about it. Then when I got to Church I was very overwhelmed and in a bit of a daze as my work colleagues were outside waiting to see me and my little dog was there too. I wasnt going to walk past and blank them all, I was enjoying my moment in the spotlight! The photographer did have us pose for some quick pics and tbh you are so caught up with everything and your nerves / adrenalin I did not have a clue what the time was at that point. Meanwhile my h2b was inside pooping his pants as I was so late!! I felt absolutely mortified afterwards when I realised how late I had been but it was completely unintentional. Sometimes late brides are not intentionally being late to make people wait around xx
  28.  
    • GillianE
      CommentAuthorGillianE
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    i also think lateness is extremely rude and there is no need for it. Preparation should be done in plenty of time and allow for mishaps etc, so then arrival at the church is on time, or even early depending on the type of person you are and your organisational skills.
    When we get married i will arrive there early, as i hate been late anywhere.

    xx
 

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