I live with my fiance and our 20 month daughter. I assumed I would stay at home with our daughter the night before the wedding and get ready for the wedding at home and my fiance would stay with his best man and all the guys would get ready over there.

However, as it turns out, my fiance also expected to stay at home (with or without our daughter) and I would stay over at my maid of honour's place and get ready there.

Neither of us are willing to back down on this, and I'm wondering what is normal?

I have to say, I'm pretty gutted. Not only will I be sleeping elsewhere, I will also have to get ready in someone elses house! I like sleeping in my own bed and never sleep well elsewhere plus if I have my daughter with me I will be even more worried about her getting up in the night as my maid of honour's house is not toddler proof. I really wanted to have my last night as a non-married woman in my own home and get ready there too :-(

I suggested tossing a coin but I lost :-(

Staying at my parents is not possible, they live too far away and will be coming to me early on the wedding day.

I am quite tempted to just announce I'm staying at home and thats that!

Well I would if it means that much to you. Me and h2b are both going from home because neither of us want to get ready in unfamiliar surroundings. I dont know whether to leave getting in to my dress until he has left or whether to just let him see me for the first time at home. I dont really care about all the superstitious stuff, and we have to have a meeting with the registrar before the cerimony so we'll probably see each other then anyway. We are even debating whether to travel to the registrar together as well.

Bikes? As in motorbikes?

Yes kastobe, bikes as in motorbikes. H2b is in a bike club, and the best man is a biker as well so they will all ride together to the ceremony with my son on the back of h2b bike. My dad and I will be arriving on a trike.

I'm hoping to convince my h2b to stay at his parents because I havemore reasons to stay at home. Our 2 year old has never slept out so I don't want to unsettle her the night before the wedding and be up all night and us both being tired and moody the next day x

Thanks all! I'm going to tackle him about this again, will keep quiet for a little bit though. I really do feel strongly about it.

Blondmumma - I'm a biker too :-) Our theme includes bikes but I won't be turning up on a motorbike though we did discuss it!

My h2b has said that he will be staying at his mams house the night before as his brother is the best man. I'll be at home as there will be me and my bridesmaids all gettin ready in the morning and I feel more comfortable at home. I don't think I could get ready anywhere else as I wouldn't feel comfortable x

H2b will stay at our house and i was planning on staying at my mum's but she suggested us and my sister(moh) to stay in the hotel that we're having our reception do in :) Are you having a hotel for your reception? You could stay there with your bridesmaids? xx

The really irritating thing is that our home is less than a mile away from the church and about 15 minutes away from the venue. My maid of honour lives a good 40 minutes away from both places!

Traditionally neither of you would be there as both live at home with your parents so you would get ready at your parents house...

I would sit him down and explain how you feel and worried about your daughter too.... and hopefully he will understand. Why dont you suggest where he could stay instead and spin it round so point out the positives of him not staying at home xx

Tell him if he wants to stay at home thats fine but you are and are planning a girlie night with your daughter and moh that includes face masks, girlie chats and lots of stupid giggling. You might persuade him he doesn't want to stay with that.
That or let him sleep at home with you then kick him out early in the morning.

Im staying at my mums with my bms & daughter.

H2b is staying at venue with bm, our son, new born baba & his parents. Only because we get a room for free the night before the wedding or he would be staying st our house x

Where does your other halfs parents live? could he not stay with them?

Me and my fiance live together but i opted to go to a hotel with a huge jacuzzi tub :D :D lol xx

Lol, well its sorted as far as I'm concerned!

I would like to say that my fiance and I had a calm discussion where I laid out the reasons on why I should stay home and then we agreed that yes that would be best.

However, what actually happened was that I just stated that I was staying at home the night before the wedding with our daughter and he can either sleep in the spare room or elsewhere. And thats that, coin toss or not.

Well done you, it needed to be done - he wasnt thinking logically obviously... so glad you helped him see sense :) x