what your personal views on a 2nd marrige of the bride but 1st marriage of the groom if they have a traditional big white wedding eg big dress, lots of BM and FG, full sit down meal, horse and carrage/posh cars, lots of flowers, big venue etc etc ??
be honest ....
"better a witty fool, than a foolish wit" shakespeare
CommentAuthorUnknown
i think it is down to personal choice and what they want but i personally think traditional big white wedding should be the brides first wedding. the wedding is about the bride really so i dont think the groom would be too bothered.
CommentAuthorXLittleMissMe!X
I think it doesn't matter if it is your 1st, 2nd or 100th time you get married it is just as important and should be treated as any other wedding. Just because other relationships failed doesn't mean that it won't work this time and or you love each other any less. If anything you have learnt from past mistakes and have a better chance of things working.
Why should you have a second rate wedding the 2nd time around? Its the same with the age thing. You are never to old to be a princess so wear the dress you want to wear and not what you think you should be wearing.
CommentAuthormummy2Olivia_Lisa
i think if the bride wanted to do it again go 4 it!!!! just because its a 2nd wedding for her doesnt make it any less special!!! x
6 n a half weeks scan!!!!!! x x x
CommentAuthorRachie :D
As long as its what you want then go for it
9th June 2012 when two worlds collide
The Crazy Cat Lady and the Transformer Man!
i think it doesnt matter what number wedding your on, its still your wedding and your obvs doing it for a reason so i would, if i ever got married again x
CommentAuthorFaeth
I think so long as you're not expecting anyone else to fork out for it - then go for it. It's not my first wedding but it is my h2b's first, and I don't see why he should miss out on the whole wedding experience just because I have done it before......
"Of course I'm not wedding obsessed!!"
CommentAuthorUnknown
everyone disagrees with me!
CommentAuthorxox-Zoeee
i personally think if it was me. i could one have one "big day" if it was a second time round it would just be a remarriage. because im young geting married if i was (god forbid) to get married again i would have a muh smaller wedding no where near as many guests and all tradion i just wouldnt care about. then again h2b said wether its brides first weddin or grooms, and no matter if they are 18 or 80 if they want the whole then no one should judge. xx
CommentAuthoralanafx
I think if its what the person wants its entirely up to them dont see why it should make a difference whether its your first or fifty first wedding why compromise because you made a mistake first time round! each to their own though i guess.
xx
our wedding day - 19th November 2011
A pair of shoes can change your life. Just ask Cinderella!
CommentAuthorCroc
intresting to see what people think....
mrs baker... your opinion its allowed hunni doesnt matter if no one agrees with you ....
if you were a guest at a 2nd marriage of a bride and they had a BIG ott traditional wedding.... would you pass comment... obv not to the bride but to any one else or whoever you went with???
"better a witty fool, than a foolish wit" shakespeare
CommentAuthorSharon Lawman 2b
its my 2nd wedding also and my H2B's 1st, i was thinking people might think the same about us but I want the whole thing so I am going for it maybe a bit more than the 1st time as then I had my mum telling me what I could and couldnt have, I dont talk to her anymore so I can do what I want, have the colours I want, the amount of bridesmaids I want and I am loving planning it, I say go for it, its special for both of you do what you want xxx
CommentAuthorUnknown
i think it depends how big the first one was. i know that for what ever reason if me and h2b were to splt up after the wedding there is no way i would want a big wedding again as this one has been to stressful to organise let alone another one
CommentAuthorSpecialSundae
Sorry, Mrs B. I don't see why someone shouldn't have a big white wedding for their second wedding. The commitment being made is the same and there's no shame in a second marriage.
I'm not really fond of the notion that a wedding is totally the bride's day. It's really for the bride, the groom, their families and everyone there; if it's too focused on being "the bride's day" it ends up looking like it's all about her rather than about the couple together. I'm not saying that it isn't an incredibly special day for her, but that if there isn't any sort of feeling that the groom was involved it feels a little hollow.
CommentAuthorAmy
I think this is entirely a personal choice. My first wedding was not big, was not white and was not fancy and nor did I feel special on that particular day.
So this time I want all of the above and am choosing to have this never mind whether it's my second wedding and Dan's first.
However had I had a big wedding the first time round I probably would have some reservations about planning something so lavish second time around.
I don't know about commenting on someone else's wedding, would probably depend on who they were.
:-)
CommentAuthorUnknown
i dont disagree with 2nd weddings or anything but i just dont understand why people would want the same big wedding more than once.
my h2b says the wedding day is all about the bride and he says the same about 2nd time round and big wedding xx
CommentAuthorSpecialSundae
Diff'ren strokes for diff'rent folks, MrsB. I'd just be really upset if mine weren't in the thick of it.
CommentAuthorCroc
mrs b i understand your opions... thats why i started this thread to see other peoples opinions on this subject and like honestyas had a search and couldnt see this topic covered....the more the merrier in honesty
"better a witty fool, than a foolish wit" shakespeare
CommentAuthorUnknown
i'll always say what i think! i always expect people to be honest with me so i do the same to others. think it would be a boring place if everyone had teh same opinions
CommentAuthormcewan07
my partner is getting married to me in august and it will be his second wedding. Granted he is the groom not the bride, but he is the one wanting the big white wedding as he never had it the first time around (his parents in law never even came ;s) I think it all depends on the person involved , if it is what they want wither they had a small "pub" wedding , no money or just want another reason to have a big party it is down to the bride n groom.
CommentAuthorUnknown
CommentAuthorstressed to max b2b
its up to the individuals x
some ppl dont allways get the big white wedding first time round due to money, family, personal circumstances etc, i dont think it matters if you've been married 1 time or a thousnad times if each time u say those vows u mean them then i think its fine. what if the hubby dies? or leaves for another woman? or vice versa what does that mean they cant have big white wedding?
only way they should'nt have a big white wedding is if there a jordan and are just a using $lag then they shouldnt be allowed :-D X
met him 25/8/97
he proposed 4/3/98
get married 21/4/12 then i will become mrs johnson
3 beautiful children together
CommentAuthorRachie :D
I remember doing a Wedding for a guy and its was his 5th time round! She was Russian and im not joking when I say I reckon she was mail order - he adored her and she didnt give a damn
9th June 2012 when two worlds collide
The Crazy Cat Lady and the Transformer Man!
CommentAuthormcewan07
lol, stressed. My OH can relate to your post (well he first bit - not jordan) his wife left him for another guy, and his ex girlfriend left him for another woman.
CommentAuthorJane
This is both mine and H2Bs 2nd wedding and we are doing the whole thing, dress, cars, reception, flowers, bridesmaids, speeches, the whole works. We want to have a wonderful day to remember, and although the first times didnt work out for either of us I dont think it excludes us from having a second attempt with someone more suitable! LOL xxxx
CommentAuthormrs_houghton_2012
edited
At the end of the day marriage is one of those things you dont expect to do again, however things happen and people change meaning you may be lucky enough to find that special someone a second time round so Im totally FOR big white weddings the second time round :) xx
Got with the most wonderful man on 1/09/05
Got engaged to my sole mate on 1/09/06
Getting married on 1/09/12
Looking forward to becoming Mrs Houghton!
CommentAuthorMagicFairies
edited
Personally, even though it's my first (and hopefully only) wedding, i have chosen not to wear a white dress (i'm not pure enough to get away with it!) But it is down to you own personal feelings, if you want the big white dress and it will make you happy - go for it - otherwise it could be something you regret not doing. It's your wedding do it your way :) Good luck xx
CommentAuthorJane
edited
Mines not technically white, its sort of ivory and pewter LOL
CommentAuthorXLittleMissMe!X
I think we are also missing something here. Who says that the big white wedding is just for the bride? Surely the groom deserves to have a dream wedding to?
CommentAuthormcewan07
i didn't miss it LOL, as i said its him that wants ours big and white .... trouble is i have to plan it.o-0 typical guy
CommentAuthorSpecialSundae
xJox - I utterly agree.
CommentAuthorClairebear67
edited
Personal preference at end of the day, what suits one bride wont suit another. This will be my second wedding - im not going for the white wedding again!! been there done that. But still will be quite big : ) with posh car or cars ( not decided yet ) On the whole its your special day, if you want a big white wedding - have a big white wedding. The groom will most likely be happy with anything you decide. : ) xx
CommentAuthorXTeresainLoveX
Its my h2b's first wedding and not my first. I got married on a budget before and my then MIL made my dress. My h2b is wanting the full white wedding I did a thread similair to this but for third time lucky. I was very unlucky both times but still took marriage seriously. I would have been happy to have a quiet do for this wedding but its not just about the Bride. The Groom is just as important he is taking the vows too. I never had the big white wedding before and I love my h2b so much so I want him to have the special day he has always dreamed of. We are shall I say a mature couple older and wiser. Its actually been refreshing planning this wedding as I've never done it like this before. I think there will always be different opinions on this subject but I honestly think unless you are as unfortunate as I was in not finding Mr Right the first time it is difficult to know what you would do
CommentAuthorAtaraxia
I think that obviously it depends on the couple but for me it does depend on the previous marriage(s). If the others have been low-key or just not what the bride or groom dreamed of, then I can understand having the big, white wedding finally... but surely once you've had the big white wedding, you don't need another one? It's different if it's first time around for bride or groom, I agree that regardless of whether the other has been married a dozen times, everyone deserves their perfect wedding even if they don't seem bothered!
I guess it's something of a minefield topic... I personally think that the celebrity marriage is ruining the spirit of marriage in general. You see all these famous people getting married to their newest love interest, having big white wedding after big white wedding and it's making divorce and remarriage something of a fad? I don't think people should be made to feel like they aren't -allowed- to do things the traditional way just because they or their other half were unlucky in love before...but I also don't think it should be completely acceptable to jump from marriage to marriage a la Jordan... marriage is sacred after all!
Hope I haven't offended anyone with my comments, I will say that it's very obvious that all the remarrying b2bs on here are considering their other half and his big day dreams as much as their own, and genuinely just want to have their day with the one they love.. and at the end of the day, love is why each and every one of us is on here and why we're doing what we're doing.. that's what's most important.
Got married 27th June and blessed on July 5th 2012
Finally Mrs M :3
Love, love... Here we are.
CommentAuthorMrsd
It really dont matter but i personally didnt want the big white wedding again, it left us in debt and we were still paying it off for a few years after, so this time i opted for a simple quiet do with just 24 people. But my ex husband is remarrying 2 days after me and is having the big white wedding again, its his second but the tramps first so they are having it even bigger than our first wedding..think thats to make a point but what ever.
CommentAuthorCroc
edited
its really nice to see different people views on this and i defo agree your day your way but there are a lot of people that believe it is wrong etc...
its my second marriage also not really broadcast it before because to me it feels likethis one now is my 1st marriage if that makes any sense at all my first marriage i was a teenager and pregnant and i didnt nor still do want kids out of wedlock (traditional values i guess from living with my nan) and my mother killed me when i told her i was expecting (she was also a teenage mum) so i married my sons dad and preganant... it was a cheap quick do in a reg office noparty etc ..... and a few months later after the arrivial of my son it was over and we realised even thou we had been toegther 3 years that we were both wrong for each other split he remianed in my house for 18 mths but we lived sepratly it was convenience for looking after own son.....but we were divorced.... but to this day we still remain friends, hes getting married next yr to his mrs they have twin baby boys , met his mother in law!! etc etc infact if he wasnt my ex husband me and his mrs would be very good friends!!!! we have been split up so long now longer than we were together or married i cant even remeber it!! but i know we always will remain friends because that how we stareted out ... and i know if i ever needed help he would be there....
and now i am marrying my h2b his 1st marriage and obviously my second... but this one even with all the stress of it all and time running out i cannot wait to marry him and spend the next 60 years together and hold hands walking down the street when im 93 with me boobs in me sock and me gurdle on and me teeth in a jar by the side of my bed... i know h2b will still think he is the luckiest man alive and i will still be his princess.... i want to scream it from the rooftops and want everyonet to know kind of thing
but he said something the other day when i showed him reading he said we cant have that one because it your second marriage and that kinda hurt and made me think.... how many others that are coming to my day are gonna think omg second marriage and shes got all this who does she think she is jordan or lisa manellie
because this time im going all out im having the biggest fattest wedding i can h2b wants it like this to ..l he wants to show off his new princess and scream from the roof tops too and so do i .... but slightly worried maybe in the back of my head that some of the family mainly mine might pass judgement.. comment... non of my friends will as only a hand full knew me way back then and they love me for me and understand why i did what i did in my first marriage ...
well your opinions have been a great help thank you xxx
"better a witty fool, than a foolish wit" shakespeare
CommentAuthorLisa Ramos
It's my partners 2nd marriage and it sounds like his was a similar situation to yours. It never even crossed my mind that people would think that about him, but I am really conscious that people will think that as I am an older bride (I will be 38 when we marry) that they will think mutton dressed as lamb and that at my age I shouldn't be having a big "ivory" wedding.
I love my lickle Ava
CommentAuthorCroc
oh lisa hush.... ur only 7 years older than me which is nothing at all your still a spring chicken... im having a big fat ivory wedding ... now if you were 60 having the whole ivory big ott wedding then fair enough might be a bit much... but at 38... behave!!! stop worrying and enjoy being the princess for the day!!!
"better a witty fool, than a foolish wit" shakespeare
CommentAuthorLisa Ramos
Lol you are funny. I always said I wanted to be married before I was 30, but the time was never right for us. We will have been together 19 years on Monday and our son is being Dave's best man, which I can't wait to hear his speech.
I love my lickle Ava
CommentAuthorLiz3yy
I think the couple in question should have whatever they want, be it their first, 4th even 10th (lol) marriage.
Can't wait until the day I become Mrs. Johnson :)
CommentAuthortweedwedding
I agree with most people on here, think it's totally up to the people getting married - glad you're feeling better about it all though hun xx
CommentAuthorFlossie
If it's what you both want....then go for it and enjoy your day!!!!x
CommentAuthorXLittleMissMe!X
You know croc I think you deserve to have the day you are having. You are a lovely person and deserve to be happy. It doesn't matter what has gone off in the past it is the here and now that matters. You have worked so hard to get to where you are now and no one can take that away from you. At least you know the real reasons why you are getting married and its got nothing to do with all the fancy things. I have a lot of respect for you and you deserve to be a princess. (even if you do have no knickers on and wee in bushes haha)
CommentAuthorCroc
awww thanks jo... i really dont know what to say but thankyou, im touched means alot (you made the croc have a tear grrrrr).... oh and in my defence every princess has to let her tiara slip occasionally to remind her self she is human hahahahaha
"better a witty fool, than a foolish wit" shakespeare
CommentAuthornickers
well i agree with jo!!!xx
MRS RICHARDSON HERE
LOVE MY LITTLE FAMILY MY GORGEOUS SON
AND HANDSOME HUSBAND XXXX
CommentAuthorSteffie
I do not think it matters what number wedding a girl may be having, if she can afford to go big big big she should!!!! lol
every girl can be a princess and it doesnt matter how many times that should be!!!! xxxx
CommentAuthorCroc
oh dont you worry i have every intentension of being the biggest fluffiest princess i possibily can and sing from the roof tops and smile all day and give my self jaw ache.... i was just wondering how many family members may comment and what they really think ..... non will say anything to my face.... but i would prefer if they did rather than behind my gynormous back (huge dress joke!!)
nothing will ruin my and hubbys day... not even missing napkin ties haha
"better a witty fool, than a foolish wit" shakespeare
CommentAuthorXLittleMissMe!X
Was that a tear of emotion there or a tear of laughter at the thought of us knowing you are no britches on? haha
Who cares what the family think? If they really feel the need to bitch it will only because they are jealous of what you have and they don't.
CommentAuthorSteffie
good!!!
sod anyone who has a problem!!! xxx
CommentAuthorCroc
haha jo i near choked on my cuppa when i read the no knickers bit i laughed that hard.... should think more carfully before i type and press post!!! the whole of the country will know me as the knickerless bride!!! and a tear just one mind you so it could have been escaping exsess water of emotion possibily!!!!!!!!
well there are 8 family members in my family all 8 are coming and all 6 (not including me floks) b!tch about my mum bcause shes done well for her self etc and lives in a nice house etc but me mum has worked blinking hard even thou shes got 80% risk of a stroke and shes not 50 yet to get where she is now just sly little digs and annoys me cos i think well maybe if you went and re trainned etc so they best not dig about me cos ill hit em, already started to get digs before with the invites off me uncle ... are you still getting married or is it off like the other one weve not recived our invite... to which i replied still on... invites dont need to be out until 12 weeks before!!! shut him up!!
"better a witty fool, than a foolish wit" shakespeare
everyone disagrees with me!
