HELP please I really dont know what to do regarding the top table. I know for sure me and my h2b will be on it haha, then do I have my 2 little girls who are my flower girls (ages 3 and 4)?? First dilemma following this is my other flower girl is my niece who is 5 and I dont really want the added responsibility of someone elses child on my wedding day (is that mean?) therefore she wouldnt be on the top table. Do I scrap having my girls on there too and split them between other tables?
Next thing is my mum and dad are divorced and have other partners although they get on so would happily sit together surely it would be unfair to split them up from their partners?
My h2bs mum and dad are divorced and hate eachother so would never sit together (lucky they are both coming tbh) my h2bs dad is single but his mum is remarried what do I do about them?
I feel like I shouldnt have one set of parents without the other but will I look bad if I dont have any of the parents up there??
My h2bs dad is his best man - does that mean he should be sat on the top table?
I think I will definitely have my two sisters who are my bridesmaids on the top table so that means so far its me, my husband to be and my 2 sisters as definites on the top table...
Who else do I have without causing myself any more stress than I already am?!? I just dont know what to do xx
I apologise if this doesnt make any sense haha xx
CommentAuthorclairenina
I'm sure the other flower girl will be fine for sitting with her parents for the meal. The children can get together and dance later. As for divorced parents, we aren't having a traditional head table. We are just seating people together how we would like them. Best man is usually at the top table, but again, it's really up to you.
CommentAuthorShowgirl
We're not having a top table either. My paents are divorced (still good friends though) but due to spaces on the table we're having my Mum and step-dad and OH parents on our table and my Dad will be hosting his own table. All my BMs and their partners are on one table and the groomsmen and their partners are on another. I think its fine to put your niece with her parents for the meal and keep your girls with you. Don't worry too much about who SHOULD be on the top table, just go with what feels right for you... perhaps have just you, OH and your little ones on the top table and have the rest of the bridal party on other tables?
CommentAuthorLauraK7
We have myself and h2b, our 3 children, my parents, h2bs mum and best man whose his brother Our other bridesmaids and even my MOH are sitting elsewhere
CommentAuthorWhovianbride
OK well I'm just going to tell you what I'm doing
1. Our daughter is also a flower girl but we're having kids entertainment in an adjoining room with all kids and my mum and other members are being responsible for her for the day so we can relax and enjoy the day.
2. We are not having any parents on 'top' table my mum is hosting her own table with thos she wants, as is oh's parents and we are having who we want on our table.
Met June 2009 on my Birthday,Met again July 2009 and got
together, May 2010 Moved in,Jan 2011 got pregnant,
August 2011 Got our own place, 2011 Had our Baby Girl,
Dec 2011 Got engaged, July 2015 Getting married! Yay!
I think it would be fine just to have your daughters and not the other flower girl, as it makes sense for the little ones to sit with their parents. With H2B's parents not getting on, if you do it the traditional way they wouldn't sit together, your dad would be next to H2B's mum and your mum next to H2B's dad. You don't have to have the parents there at all though, I would agree with Showgirl and suggest that it's you, H2B and your daughters. Then the parents can be on different tables with their respective partners, and H2B's parents can be separate. H2B's dad doesn't need to be on the top table, I've seen people doing speeches who've just come to the front from their seat. Does H2B's dad have other family there that he can sit with, like siblings?
30th August 2014 was the best birthday ever.
It was the day that I became Mrs. Dixon.
CommentAuthorHappyBunny
We are just having me h2b and our 2 children as I don't have any parents. H2b parents are still together but our bms have 7 children between them and 2 are single so would mean someone else looking after their children if they sat at top table with us. I don't tradition really allows for how life truly is sometimes xx
CommentAuthorRachelE118
I'd have everyone you've listed, just separating the ones who don't get on, except your niece who can sit with her parents OR only have mums and dads and not steps. Our top table is 11 people!! :)
CommentAuthorAprilS61
You could just have top table for your bridal party? That saves having to work out all the parents and easily explained even though it would mean OHs dad on top table as his best man. Nobody can really argue much about it.
Mr & Mrs Swan 04/04/15
CommentAuthorMrsManiatt
my sisters both didn't have top tables, they had a table to themselves for them and their hubbys to save the hassle. So you could always just have you 2 and your girls :)
Me and Rich are having a mini top table, with us and both sets of parents. we havent included anyone else because my bridesmaids have kids and his bestman would rather sit with the groomsmen than be stuck on his own xxx
CommentAuthorVickiD69
Now a days people have just a 'two table' as the top table just you and your partner. But you could have just you two and your two little girls, one either side of you, would make for lovely pictures! Also that way you can have each parent hosting their own table so they are separated but part of the wedding :) x
CommentAuthorJadeE26
Thankyou all so much for your advice it is really appreciated :) once I have done my table plan ill let you all know what I decide :) xx thankyou again xxx
CommentAuthorRachelW22
Both my parents and h2b's parents are divorced and re all remarried or have partners, my parents get on ok but my h2b's parents dont . Also the same as you i dont want the responsibility of having to watch others children so im only having one flowergirl at the top table as shes mine and our best man but we dont we dont want our parents sitting elsewhere or being seperated from their patners so we have decided to have our flowergirl, both mothers and their parners alongside myself and the best man, both fathers and their partners alongside the groom so neither parents are sitting next to their ex or new partners if that helps we also decided that way was better as both mothers know each better than for instance my mother and my h2b's father.
CommentAuthorCharlotteE98
My parents are divorced and remarried and we've decided that we're having my Step-parents on the top table along with my half sister as she's the only bridesmaid, H2B's parents, my parents and best man. We'll have the traditional top table seating arrangements with my Step-parents at either end. My Niece who will be flower girl will be sat with her parents.
A friend at work's parents are divorced and can't stand each other, same with her Husband's parents, so when they got married they had Glenn's Mum at the top table and Gemma's Mum and now Stepdad, but they seated their Dads and their OHs with other family members. She said everybody understood the decision and it all worked out really well.
