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  1.  
    • Anon
      CommentAuthorAnon
      Got married 4 years ago
      Posted: Mar 8th 2015
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    I realise I won't get a firm idea until I actually ask some of our guests but I feel a tiny bit daft doing that before booking a venue and knowing the date... even though it'd be too late to do anything about the day at that point.

    We're aiming for a Thursday to reduce costs at a lovely venue (hopefully May 4th 2017) but 90% of our guests are coming from the countryside where we're originally from - 2.5hrs drive or 1.5hrs by train or 3.5hrs by bus.
    Is it too much to ask folk to travel to attend a Thursday wedding if we have a later ceremony to minimise the days off work needed?
    They'd be getting nearly a year and a half notice of the date, long before formal invites are sent out.

    We want to avoid booking the venue (minimum 40 guests) then the majority saying they can't make it so it's basically wasted money. How best to approach family to ask if a Thursday would work for them? Is it too early to be running potential dates past them?

    Met 2004. Together 2007. Engaged 2012. Tying the knot 2017.


  2.  
    • Myranny
      CommentAuthorMyranny
      Got married 4 years ago
      Posted: Mar 8th 2015
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Not at all. You're asking them to travel a fair way, on a weekday, so I'd just be forward about it. Tell them you're planning to get married, probably on x date, and it WILL be a weekday, so you want to know how many people are going to commit to saying yes they will be able to go before you book it. It's best to give guests notice if they're travelling - we've got about 10 guests or so coming from Sweden, and another 10 from 2 1/2 hours away and we told them all it would be September 2016 and asked if they would come, they all said yes, brilliant, thanks for the notice, and now we've confirmed the date. Most people should appreciate the heads up, you can then go back to them and let them know once you confirm the date :) xx
  3.  
    • lala "mod" bunni
      CommentAuthorlala "mod" bunni
      Got married 9 years ago
      Posted: Mar 8th 2015
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    i Agree start saying about it now ..... some may not be able to come not because they cant travel down on the thursday but more because to do the trip back they will either have to leave "early " or try and get the friday off too

  4.  
    • lala "mod" bunni
      CommentAuthorlala "mod" bunni
      Got married 9 years ago
      Posted: Mar 8th 2015
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    remembering that anyone who works in a school is majorly unlikely to get any time off !!!!

  5.  
    • Anon
      CommentAuthorAnon
      Got married 4 years ago
      Posted: Mar 8th 2015
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    Our families are a mix of council workers, admin workers and self employed (my dad is the only one with a strict holiday rota who needs to book holidays more than a year out). Thank you so much for the advice and guidance on this, will be contacting relatives tonight to see what works best for them.

    Met 2004. Together 2007. Engaged 2012. Tying the knot 2017.


  6.  
    • Mrs D2B
      CommentAuthorMrs D2B
      Got married 3 years ago
      Posted: Mar 8th 2015
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    Is it that weekend that is the 4 day bank holiday weekend in May? as you may not have to worry so much about guest having to get home for work on Friday, but on the flip side you may find some guests may not be happy about loosing a second day's work in one week. A late afternoon wedding may be better for some people, but if you don't ask you can't be sure. I'd ask everyone before booking to be sure if they can make it, I'm sure they won't mind in fact some may be grateful for such early warning!

    Members signature icon
    31/12/2017 A New Year, A New Life, A New Husband and Wife


  7.  
    • thefuture:Mrs_Hurren
      CommentAuthorthefuture:Mrs_Hurren
      Got married 5 years ago
      Posted: Mar 8th 2015
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    My family have to travel for 3 hours and I know it can be difficult when your guests have a way to travel. I asked who would like to attend before even booking my venue. It's a lot to ask of people to come that way, especially as they will most likely need to stay overnight and most people will need 2 days off work to attend. That's why I wouldn't have considered a weekday wedding.

    It's best to be upfront and ask as it will make it easier for you in the long run .
  8.  
    • Whovianbride
      CommentAuthorWhovianbride
      Got married 5 years ago
      Posted: Mar 8th 2015
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      edited
     
    We are having a Tuesday wedding and fair amount of our guests live 2+ hours away we are in south Devon, they are in Oxford, cambridge, London, Darby.
    And no one has had any worries, I'd anyone says anything which do far had only been ohs mother, is if it are a Saturday would cost us £3000+ extra and if someone else has a Saturday wedding we would have to get the days off (oh is chef who works weekends), so why can't they get it off for us?

    But like you we let people know all in advance, or STDs went out 18 months before.

    Members signature icon
    Met June 2009 on my Birthday,Met again July 2009 and got
    together, May 2010 Moved in,Jan 2011 got pregnant,
    August 2011 Got our own place, 2011 Had our Baby Girl,
    Dec 2011 Got engaged, July 2015 Getting married! Yay!
  9.  
    • Anon
      CommentAuthorAnon
      Got married 4 years ago
      Posted: Mar 8th 2015
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    We approached both sides (ah the wonders of Facebook) and, as expected, the mid-week date we had on the list was a no go for our welsh/irish relatives. Late on a Thursday got the all clear, as did a Friday date (if we can work out prices)

    Come the end of the month, we'll be able to sign on the dotted line and secure a date with a venue knowing that we've done our best to accommodate everyone.

    Met 2004. Together 2007. Engaged 2012. Tying the knot 2017.


  10.  
    • Myranny
      CommentAuthorMyranny
      Got married 4 years ago
      Posted: Mar 9th 2015
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I've found Friday dates tended to be the same money or even more expensive than a Sunday date, so you could maybe explore that option too? Though from that far away it may mean taking the Monday off so probably doesn't make much difference x
  11.  
    • lala "mod" bunni
      CommentAuthorlala "mod" bunni
      Got married 9 years ago
      Posted: Mar 9th 2015
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    the only bank holidays in may 2017 are 1st & 29th

  12.  
    • Flossie
      CommentAuthorFlossie
      Got married 5 years ago
      Posted: Mar 9th 2015
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    I'd be tempted to go for a Friday if you can and budget permitting (although it should be the same price if not very similar to a Thursday). At least then people won't potentially have to take 2 days off work and it can then roll onto the weekend x

    Members signature icon
    Happily married
    18th June 2016
    xx
  13.  
    • michgib
      CommentAuthormichgib
      Getting married in 7 months
      Posted: Mar 9th 2015
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    Thats loads of notice for people and im sure they would come given that much notice. We have changed the date of our wedding so that my brother can come asmhe lives and works in Australia and I really want him to be there. Lucky for me it is a week day he can make it.
  14.  
    • VictoriaL46
      CommentAuthorVictoriaL46
      Got married 5 years ago
      Posted: Mar 9th 2015
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    My OH and I are having a Monday wedding for the same reason, to reduce costs. We made sure that the date we booked saved us money as well as was in the overlap for Scotland and England school summer holidays so friends and family with children from both ends of the UK could make it. We have them 18 months notice to allow everyone to book travel arrangements and we have not had a single complaint about the fact this is a weekday wedding.

    Members signature icon
    Met in Nov 2005
    Engaged 13th June 2013
    Becomes Mrs Stewart on 10th Aug 2015 Honeymoon in Florida!
    My Diary Thread: My Alice in Wonderland Wedding Diary
  15.  
    • CamilaL
      CommentAuthorCamilaL
      Got married 3 years ago
      Posted: Mar 9th 2015
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I'm also planning to get married on a Thursday and this is really something I'm thinking about before booking. H2b thinks it will be all right, but I want to talk to his mum first. My family is all coming from Brazil, so it doesn't really matter, but his family comes from Sunderland and we need to see if that would be ok...
  16.  
    • Anon
      CommentAuthorAnon
      Got married 4 years ago
      Posted: Mar 9th 2015
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    Fired off a quick query to the venue. Monday through Wednesday are cheapest rates, followed by Thursday and Sunday, Friday and Saturday coming out as most expensive.

    Aiming for the Friday but if they can give us a better rate for guest rooms or a serious discount/upgrade on the Thursday date - we'll be hard pushed not to snap it up. Post 4pm ceremony Thursday got the same responses re: days off as a mid-day ceremony on the Friday. Fingers crossed the haggling goes well. Cheers for all the guidance ladies, it's been invaluable.

    Met 2004. Together 2007. Engaged 2012. Tying the knot 2017.


  17.  
    • ElizabethF49
      CommentAuthorElizabethF49
      Got married 5 years ago
      Posted: Mar 9th 2015
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    I think that no matter what day you have it on people will moan (Some people work weekends) do whats right for you and H2b a sunday may be cheaper for the venue and most suppliers but its more expensive for a registrar. Id say if sunday is cheaper than friday go with that day people will need to take a day off no matter what if its a friday or a sunday.

    good luck :)

    Members signature icon
    After 7 years and 11 months he proposed to me 18.10.13
    Our son is 5 years old and our world
    Getting married 15.08.15.
    Life hasnt been easy but we have each other :)
  18.  
    • Myranny
      CommentAuthorMyranny
      Got married 4 years ago
      Posted: Mar 10th 2015
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    Is Sunday really more expensive for the registrar? It wasn't for us, it was £500 on any day of the week. xx
  19.  
    • Anon
      CommentAuthorAnon
      Got married 4 years ago
      Posted: Mar 10th 2015
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    Our local office said the same Elizabeth. Not sure what it cost to have it at the office on a Sunday (or if they do it), but they definitely had a higher Saturday vs weekend charge for their room. For them to come to the venue:
    MON - FRI (10am - 3.30pm) - £210
    MON - FRI (4pm - 6pm) - £305
    SAT (10am - 6pm) - £305
    SUN + Public Holidays (10am - 6pm) - £325

    Met 2004. Together 2007. Engaged 2012. Tying the knot 2017.


 
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