Major problem. Me and the OH have jus got a new house ive just got a new job and everything's settled down. We were talking about getting a pub together once were married. weve just booked the church & reception. My OH was previously in the army and came out due to his ex. Out of the blue he has decided that he's going back in the RMP. Which start training this november. He'll miss mine & his 21st and our anniversary but get 2 weeks off over xmas. Problem is he only gets weekends off in his phase 2 and were getting married sunday 6th may halfway through his phase 2. Im not bothered about no honeymoon.... but it will literally be service half of the reception & he'll be gone....... What shall i do? This weekend is a bank holiday monday, i asked his carrers guy and he wsnt alot of use about weather he would get monday off aswell. Sorry ladies for the rant..... Help? Xx
CommentAuthor~ஜ~Tiggs Daltry~ஜ~
didnt he discuss this with you before hand
CommentAuthorRobynFrances1990
Erm yeah but he was like well im not happy with been unemployed i love the army and he wasnt going to settle in any other job and i said i would support him obviously. but its stressing me out tbh. =0(
CommentAuthor~ஜ~Tiggs Daltry~ஜ~
im sorry hun but i think its selfish of him,yes its good he wants to work but there are jobs out there,the army is a hard life especially on the wives,he should of included you in his decision
CommentAuthorRobynFrances1990
I know. I couldnt stop him though. Im jus going to have to go along for the ride.... All my friends think its a great idea. My family are horrified. =0(
you really need to speak to him,a good marriage is based on the couple talking discussing and making decisions together,it has to be.you need to sort this out fast hunni xxx
CommentAuthorz
i can see robyn's side on this . my other half came out just before we met and now signed bk up again so he may get in again, he cant cope wi civvy life and struggles wi normal life but im behind him 100%... yes its selfish of him but i wanna see him happy and thats all that matters to me..xx
CommentAuthorPinky1985
Awww hun! I feel for you but in my experience, army guys love it so much they never settle very well on civvy street, a sort of friend, could have been more but never was, was this way............part of the reason I never committed to him as Army alway came first! Fair play to him tho for knowing what he wants but I agree maybe he should have discussed it abit more with you as he is marrying you!!! Typical man! If your happy for it to go ahead this way it could be a very exciting chapter in BOTH your lives! A marriage is only the BEGINNING you have many many happy years ahead! Hugs xxx
CommentAuthorkimmy
I really hope you manage to sort things out!!!
CommentAuthorlala "mod" bunni
as an ex-navel wife i have first hand knowledge of this ....... my ex was in the navy for 19yrs ( i was with him for 17yrs ) when he cam out he found it really diffficult to settle and tbh i think that was part of the reson we split up.
you need to talk together long and hard ,,, could he join the next wave of training ? what about joining the TA`s that could satisfy his army need .
to be fair if he aint even 21 he cant of been in the army that long!!!!! and i agree wiv tiggs..... he aint thinkin of u at all here
Engaged 27th November 2010
Hen Do Newcastle 2nd June 2012
Marrying the man of my dreams 11th August 2012!
Honeymoon To Jamaica 14th October 2012
CommentAuthorVicky
just make sure you get wedding insurance as will cover any army problems!!
CommentAuthorRobynFrances1990
Thanks ladies! i think once he's done his training the hardest part will be over. But i hate not been in control. He could have mentioned it before we booked the church and reception haha. Were both army fiolm junckies but now when we watch em the cogs start going cause they never portray the good parts of army life do they. I'm gunna keep working away and let things roll thier course. He may not even stay in.... Any way i just needed to vent and have a talk to some unbiased people. I forgot to mention the MIL said why not stop taking the pill, he'll have to stay if you've a bun in the oven! i was gobsmacked. At that point i had the 5 year coil fitted. Lol. Any way rambling on... thanks again ladies! xxxx
CommentAuthorKimmie.Bride.to.be
Feel sorry for you. My h2b is serving in the raf and cant wait to come out to be a proper family. xxx
CommentAuthorxox-Zoeee
i loveee been a soon to be army wag. h2b is gettin thursday til monday off for our wedding his co guarenteed that for him. it a bit off him to be so set on it and not incude you so much i know i had my heart set on going to uni but h2b said hed leave the army then cos it would be another 2 year not seein me so we decided on him stayin in and me following him which took a longg time to decide and everything. but anyway dont worry about the weddin long as hes there for that day its all that matters. xx
CommentAuthorRobynFrances1990
Well he'll be in his phase 2 when we get married. They supposdely get weekends off but its a bank holiday so i didnt know if he would get a long weekend. either way we get married late sunday afternoon so he'll only get to be at half the reception and not even get the ' night of the wedding'. I've sent him in search of info next time he goes o the careers office. Hmmmf. Do you know what married quatreters are like? Xxxx
CommentAuthorPaula
As a former army wife I can say they quarters vary from basic to really nice, Have you considered changing the date???
CommentAuthorIgnition
You should speak to him, tell him your concerns, and see what he says. xx
Can't wait to be Mrs Mansfield
Having a Fun Fair Reception
It's going To Be Awesome
Roll On The 15th September 2012
CommentAuthorMrs Brakes
I'm going to throw a spanner in the works and agree with some of the others girls. How could he have made a HUGE decision like that without your agreement. It's a major thing, it's not like he's decided what your having for tea or where to go at the weekend. He has effectively changed your entire lives without discussing it. Fine, HE goes back into the army but what about the house and your job, your lives and the future you had planned? And now, if I've read this right, he's not even likely to be there for the whole wedding day / night. You seem very calm about this, I'd have ripped his arms off and beaten him with them!
Got married 11/11/11.
CommentAuthorMrs (Dove) Pidgeon
Re the bank holiday... I *think* its unlikely to be a working day as the Army does follow bank holiday patterns (so the training staff will be expecting the day off) so they may have a long weekend. However its likely that won't be confirmed until he gets his training schedule at the beginning of the course.
Being an army wife does have its positives and negatives (this coming from someone with a two week old baby whose husband is currently away for the next four months!).
Now a extremely happy German housewife and now a Mother!!!!
Islay Jean born 24th June in Hannover.
CommentAuthorMrs (Dove) Pidgeon
Ps...... I would be angry if Pidge had joined the army without talking it throught with me first- I knew his intentions before I started dating him, let alone engaged to him.
Now a extremely happy German housewife and now a Mother!!!!
Islay Jean born 24th June in Hannover.
CommentAuthorMrsMcleish2B
Keep on at him to clarify with his superiors, my h2b is in the Army and they are generally REALLY good with weddings and with authorise leave. I would be really shocked if he couldn't get just 1 day when my partner is being offered 2 weeks leave after ours.
