Hi all I am totally stressing about this. Short history to this dilemma is, my Dad remarried when i was young and took on 2 step sons and then went onto have another child with his wife. I have never really had much to do with the step brothers as they've never been interested in knowing me or my children. They get on really well with my real brother but i don't even really know my little sister who is now 20. I've always had a bit of an up and down relationship with my real dad and step mum, basically he always made me feel guilty for his leaving my mum, even though he had an affair, reckons i live in the past and have never forgiven him. I have a life and don't hold on to the past, each to their own. Anyway, my dilemma is, I don't particularly want to invite my step family to our wedding next year, other than my dad, his wife and my half sister. I know it will probably cause a bigger rift so don't know what to do. This wedding is so important to me because i've finally found the man of my dreams but its really stressing me out what reaction i get if i don't send them invitations. PLease help
CommentAuthorStave
As much as you think you dont want them there because you dont have much to do with them. I am a positive believer that weddings can and do bring people together. Sending them an invite could open the doors to a whole new relationship for you all as an extended family.
Wish you well with your choices x
CommentAuthorUnknown
i wouldnt worry about it for the moment. you have a while until you need to send out invites. maybe speak to your dad and see what he thinks?
my dad has been with his girlfriend on and off for over 2 years and she has 2 children. they are engaged so these kids are going to be my step brother and sister but i have never met her and never met the kids so none of them are getting invited to my wedding.
xx
CommentAuthorXTeresainLoveX
Thanks, not sure its that easy though. The eldest step brother just got married in Rome, invited me last year via my Dad but the kids and my partner were not invited! We come as a package so I didn't go because I couldn't afford it and didn't want to go on my own without my h2b or kids. Its almost like we are not accepted as a package and I know the invite was only sent because of my Dad. It is difficult to know what to do because I have always been the one that made the effort but always had it thrown back in my face
CommentAuthorXTeresainLoveX
Sorry Mrsbarkertobe my previous reply was to Jaesin x I have thought about just leaving it til next year, we have got time i guess to decide. My Dad would expect them to be invited though, I already know that. He has more to do with them than me and his grandchildren. Has never spent any time getting to know my kids, just sees them on their birthdays and christmas, feels like its just out of duty
now you have said that i personally wouldnt bother to invite them! i think it is so rude to invite someone but not their other half and kids.
but on the other hand we arent having kids at out wedding so havnt invited them just adults. if they have never tried i would just leave it and invite people that you care about.
sorry if that comes across mean... xx
CommentAuthormadison_uk
my mum remarried have three step brothers all do my head in, one i cant stand, there not invited at all and Ive told my mum and step dad there not wasn't a problem, i dont see them or speak to them at all, invite who you want
CommentAuthorStave
edited
But then again, there could have been reasons why only you were invited. It might have been a no child affair. Numbers might have been limited over there. Because you dont talk to them, there could have been a valid reason why the invite was only addressed to you.
Imagine it was a no child affair, so the invite was to you, they didnt want to assume that you were in or out of a relationship and didnt want to have "a plus one" as it was an small family affair. Maybe they had hoped for you to respond and say that were with someone long-term. Your dad might have said you are with Mr Smith, but in fact you were now with Mr Jones. So they kept it basic as to to offend, as they simply dont have enough contact with you to know.
People are not "always" mean, they may have been trying to be sensitive to your situation and their wedding.
CommentAuthorMrsMelodyWalker
I wouldn't invite them!
All of my dreams come true the day I married you, Mr Walker
5.11.11
Remember Remember The 5th of November
CommentAuthorXTeresainLoveX
They knew I was engaged and didnt even send us a card! Bless you Jaesin for trying to see the good in them but they genuinely are very ignorant and have never even made the effort with the kids. Not one birthday card ever. I don't have a mean bone in my body and am always trying to please everyone else but just not sure I can this time
CommentAuthorMrsMelodyWalker
Stop trying to please everyone hun because you will end up not being pleased yaself.
All of my dreams come true the day I married you, Mr Walker
5.11.11
Remember Remember The 5th of November
CommentAuthorStave
Trust me, I always do try to see the best or see reasons for actions. But if they are reallylike £$%& them!
