Wedding Forum - Starting early... Booked and Planning...

I love this idea of a wedding planning diary so I thought I'd start my own, not only will it stop me filling other parts of the forum with ridiculous questions but I'm hoping it will help me keep track of what I'm doing and get some helpful hits and tips from other lovely brides to be along our journeys.
So to introduce my self I'm Becky, 26 mum of a beautiful 21 month old little girl, Restaurant manager. I have 3 brothers and 1 sister and I have been brought up by my amazing grandparents in Cornwall (WARNING I have a very difficult relationship with my mum so there will be the odd rant about how much she is driving me up the wall!!).
I met my h2b on April 1st 2011. He was a doorman at the club where my brother worked, after a drunken phone call to my brother I was extremely rude to my h2b on the phone, after sobering up and realising what a cow I had been to him I messaged him through fb to apologise. one thing led to another and we agreed to meet for the first time the next day. Whilst sitting waiting for his train to get in at the arranged time the date crossed my mind and began to think I may have fallen victim to a cruel (but not undeserved) April fools prank, however he showed up!!! After that first day together I knew I had found someone very special and we became inseparable, I met his family (all 100+ members!!) just a week later at his nieces 1st birthday party! On our first holiday together in Sept 2012 my h2b announced that he had been planning on proposing whilst we were away, however we had found out just weeks ago that we were pregnant so we agreed that an engagement could wait as we had enough excitement to deal with. Our perfect princess was born April 16th 2013 and has brought nothing but joy to us.
Finally on Dec 24th 2014 my h2b was true to his word and asked me to marry him and I have spent countless hours since planning the day when I will take the name of my perfect prince and our perfect princess.
I have always dreamed of a summer wedding, out doors with a marque, garden games, hog roast wedding photos at sunset the whole shebang! However my sister (who got engaged 18 months before me) has already started planning and paying for exactly the same thing. So I asked myself what could I do that is different.... and then it hit me! I hate winter it cold dark and gloomy, Christmas doesn't really excite me (I find it far to commercialized), the only exciting thing that winter brings is new years eve, a night to remember the old and celebrate the new.... how fitting for a wedding!!! And so the planning begins!
I have a budget of £12,000 (although this can be stretched to £14,000 if absolutely necessary)
The bridesmaids have been chosen (although there was never any doubt in this matter) and I have been to see a few venues already and have found one which is perfect, I am currently waiting on a quote to work out if this will be forever my dream venue or if this is the first step in preparing for our big day. I have almost set in stone ideas for my venue decoration (all DIY winter inspired) and although it is far to early I have started looking for inspiration for mine and my bridesmaids dresses.
I think I have bored you all enough with my story for now but I plan on sharing all my ideas, wishes and realities in this diary for the next 2 years 11 months and 5 days by which time you will all be thoroughly fed up of me!!
Thank you for taking the time to read my story and I look forward to talking with you all and sharing our wedding adventures together!

Venue- Booked Deposit paid!!
Registrar- Booked and deposit paid!!
Dress-
Bridal party dresses-
Shoes-
Groomsmen suits-
Flowers-
Decorations- booked and deposit paid
Cake- Spoken to cake maker have a quote and date booked
Photographer- Booked and deposit paid.
DJ-
Musician-
Casino- booked and deposit paid.
Photobooth- Booked and deposit paid
Table plan display- I have an idea which involves fairy lights and a door..... just need to find a door lol
Fireworks- Arranged
Rings-
Hair- Booked
Make up-
Invitations and STD's- started designing my own
Honeymoon- decided on a few days in Disney Land imediately after the wedding with our little princess, then h2b and I will go for a proper honeymoon just the two of us in the summer when we have more options for sun

Congratulations! Looking forward to seeing how your plans go :)

Sounds lovely MrsD, looking forward to hearing more as you go along! A winter New Years wedding will be amazing x

Sounds like you are very lucky with all your contacts, that will definitely drive costs down which will leave you more in the budget to spend on your dream venue itself. Definitely takes a huge weight off your shoulders knowing so many things are sorted (or roughly sorted) already.

It's also a great idea to spread the costs as much as possible. We are hoping to get little bits and bobs sorted this year, so by the end of the year we will hopefully have most things done and dusted, which just leaves us to pay off suppliers next year and have a bit of an easy ride! X

Congratulations on your engagement

I've just been to visit another venue, it hasn't given me butterflies the same way my dream venue did (who still hasn't sent me a quote!! How much longer is it polite to wait before asking them again for a rough figure?!), however it has made me think. It is not a picturesque location, outside isn't pretty (although they are currently in the process of building an outside wedding area so I can imagine it would look a lot better by my proposed wedding date), however it is a mile away from the 3den pr0ject and I'm sure there would be no issues popping down there for some truly spectacular wedding photos (as long as I don't mind wondering about in my dress!!).
The venue itself is also very small but I can imagine in winter with all the xmas decs up it will feel like an over sized ski lodge fitting in with my winter theme perfectly! The other big plus point is that the quote they have given me includes the venue, a 2 night stay in the adjoining house (which sleeps 12) the wedding breakfast, evening buffet, welcome drinks, wine for the tables, toasting drinks (x2 as I have requested bubbles at midnight) and this comes to just over 1/2 my planned budget giving me a large sum of money to be able to do everything else I have planned to a much higher standard than previously considered (or have a more exotic honeymoon).
So for the moment I have the battle of head and heart, but with the heart still got giving me a price and with me wanting to have a venue sorted sooner rather than later I think the head may win. I'm sure this is a dilemma you have all faced in your wedding planning, what did you do?

Personally, I'd go with your heart..... The reason I say this is because I'm very impulsive and just want things here and now. Normally I regret my decision and then it's too late! If you love your original venue so much, perhaps just hang fire a bit..... If it's more expensive than anticipated just remember you have time to save if you really love it x

Evening ladies! How is everyone today?
If I can afford it I will defo go with my heart but I truly think it won't be possible money wise (especially as I would have to hire a catering company etc separately). I'll give the dream venue until Monday then I'll email them again asking for a quote then start making some more decisions. However upon having a few hours thinking about it the place I saw today (although its not perfect) it has a lot more pro's than con's and with the price being what it is it would allow me to do everything I want to do without compromise. I think I will have to go back with another pair of eyes to get a second opinion before making a decision.
Hi Danielle, it's nice to know I'm not the only crazy one who has started planning so early!! Please feel free to share some of your ideas as I share mine, we may be able to help each other out!! Have you set a date yet?

YOu have plenty of time to find the perfect place for the right price.

With the date you'd like to get married on I can imagine you would need to book your venue earlier than most. We booked 2 years in advance which seemed like ages at the time, but 7 months has already whizzed by just like that!!

The only thing I would say is be cautious with booking suppliers too early, as if you are looking to take out wedding insurance most insurers will only cover deposits and payments made up to 2 years before your wedding date x

even if it does come down to figures, at least you would be happy with either :) x

haven't set a date yet :) I'd like it early in the year and possibly around my birthday (12th feb) but NOT valentines day as thats my daughters birthday ^_^ theres obviously a date on my profile lol but no doubt it'll be changed ;)

So a quick update. My dream venue got back to me and said they couldn't give me a quote for 2017 because it's a policy of theirs not to book that far in advance... less than helpful. I found another venue that I fell in love with, when looking around they said they thought it would be around the £6500 mark and although they only allow one catering company to cater for their functions he is very accommodating and will work to any budget, all in all it sounded fantastic and I left there feeling a million times better about everything. However when the quotes came in the venue wanted £8495... quite a bit more than expected and slightly over budget, but again we have the option of charging guest for their accommodation so we could afford it at a push. However there one and only caterer quoted £4959 for a 2 course sit down meal for 65 people and evening buffet for 80 people!! This is twice as much as some of the previous quotes I have had and means the venue and catering would swallow almost all the budget so that's not going to work. I have emailed this venue to ask if they would consider allowing us to use a different caterer, but no reply yet (I emailed them a week ago).
I went with my h2b to see yet another venue, very popular around here for weddings, and he's happy with it. They want £12,250 which includes a 3 night stay for 32 people exclusive use of the barn (where the ceremony takes place) the function room, and their 14 acres of land, 3 course sit down meal, evening buffet, welcome drinks, bar service, wedding team running up to and on the day of the wedding and evening entertainment. Not a bad deal when you consider we could make up to £4000 back off the accommodation. However although h2b thinks it's spot on I wasn't overly impressed with the wedding barn or the function room (although I know I could make them special by decorating them exactly how I want to). And my biggest concern is that we would be relying on 32 people paying for accommodation to make it affordable. At £120pp for a 3 night stay in 5*gold accommodation it sounds like a really good deal but for a family of 4 this works out at £480 which I don't think many people would be willing to pay. I can guarantee 16 places would be filled but I would be taking a massive gamble on the other 16 places and I'm not sure I'm comfortable with that.
All in all the other venue that I previously visited is becoming more and more attractive, I'm still not 100% sure about it (I don't think I ever will be) but it would allow me to do everything I want to with out stressing about money constantly. So I have emailed them asking if h2b and I were to go down for a valentines meal would someone be able to let us in to the manor house so that we can look at the accommodation again. Thought this would be a good idea as h2b can then see the venue, we can see what the standard of food is like and also see how the venue works when it is full of people. Hopefully I'll get an email back today confirming that.
So really I'm not further with my planning, just getting more and more disheartened really. However I'm happy that h2b is appearing to be more on board with the whole thing, we've had a couple of discussions and he's starting to understand why we have to book so early and is more willing to come and look at places with me!
I hope everyone is ok and enjoying their wedding journeys!

Well I've gotten no further with the venue :(
The venue that became overpriced by the caterers have gotten back to me, apparently they have spoken to the caterer themselves and he has said this was just an initial quote based on the info I gave him (I understood this but as I asked for a simple 2 course roast dinner meal and evening buffet I thought it was quite obvious I wanted cheap and simple not a £55 pp meal and £295 cheese tower!!) and there is a lot of room to bring the price down if I have a chat with him. I'll give him a call later in the week but I'm not convinced especially as the initial quote gave me the impression that he was trying to mug me off as he knew he is the only caterer that venue allows.
I went to see the place where we used to have our sixth form balls last week. The package they are offering is great Exclusive use of hotel and grounds, Reception drinks, canapes, 4 course wedding breakfast, tea coffee homemade shortbread, wine with meal, 2 rounds of sparkly (1 for the toasts 1 for midnight) Evening buffet, toast master, wedding photographer, chair covers and sash's, DJ and complementary bridal sweet and 2 rooms for bridal party for £9495!!! Sounds great on the surface, but of course the photographer will charge an arm and a leg for the photos, and in the terms and conditions it states that "exclusive use of the hotel entails booking 19 rooms. If 19 rooms are not booked the wedding couple must pay the difference", this annoyed me as I don't understand why they couldn't give a price including accommodation as every other venue has rather than being sneaky about it!! Honestly if I hadn't of read the T's & C's and asked the lady out right she wouldn't have told me about this she just kept going on about how it was a relief to many couples to have there guests book and pay for there own rooms as it was much less stressful this way!
Anyway I have an appointment to see yet another place on Tuesday so we will see how that goes.
The good news is that h2b and I sat and had a massive chat about the wedding last night (a relief for me because every time I have tried to talk to him he just shrugged it off to the point where it appeared to annoy him) I now know that he really liked the place that we went to see together the other day, although he said this is possibly because it is the only place he's seen, so he wants to come see the venue that I'm still not 100% sure on (but ticks most of the boxes) to see what he thinks. But we have agreed that rather than going on honeymoon straight after the wedding (meaning we would have to go in the Caribbean direction in order to find sun at that time of year) were going to take our princess to Disney Land for a few days, and then go for our child free honeymoon in the summer. And we have also decided that were going to use a trowel to cut the cake!! Silly thing to be thinking about already but h2b is a bricky and it was an idea given to us by a friend that brought a smile to both of us so that's that lol.
I think that's all atm, I hope everyone is having fun with their planning and I can't wait to find out who won on monday! There is one very lucky and very happy b2b out their and I can't wait to share her excitement!!]
Have a good day all xx

I know it's normal and it's something I've come across with every potential venue, but they have been up front about it where as this one seemed to be trying to hide it. The other major downside was they couldn't guarantee that we could stay the night before, it would depend if they had another wedding in or not :(
However I have looked at the photography package and I'm pleasantly surprised, it includes half a day photography (getting ready up to the wedding breakfast) and you get all the photos on cd ready to print plus a 30 page wedding album and a few other bits and bobs so not the arm and leg I was expecting!!

Sounds exciting and stressful! Keep searching and you'll find the perfect venue for what you want and suits budget :)

I'd say the rooms are average. With our venue I had to ask about rooms to be told that 10 are reserved for guests so similar to you (this isn't a issue for us as have a lot of family who will be travelling)

Ok that's a hard when it's people your so close to. But I agree. The main thing is you three and the ceremony. The people and the afters are just nice things to add on and not overly important

What better things do people have to do on NYE anyway, apart from going to the pub, a party or out for a meal? A wedding on NYE would be lovely as a guest in my opinion, what better way to bring in the new year?! X

Lounge done, coffee break lol.
My grandparents (as much as I love them and I owe them everything) are very difficult people, unless you do things as they want them done their not happy, however they won't tell you how they want it done just criticise when you get it wrong lol. I have learned to just get on with it and they'll come around in the end.
tbh my grandparents are just the start of my wedding worries, I also have a MIL who has not spoken to me since she found out I don't like her new bf and I'm not happy with him being around our daughter (safety issues) almost a year ago and a mother who thinks she has the right to all the MOB privileges despite walking out on me and my brother when I was 3years old and to this day will blame other people rather than take responsibility for her mistakes. oh it's all to come lol!!
Right on to the kitchen and the dreaded washing up :(

Right so I finally think I'm down to the last 3 venues, unfortunately none of these are the dream venues I have fallen in love with but they were just unrealistic in regards to price. h2b has only seen 1 of these venues so I'm taking him to the other 2 this weekend but in the mean time I'd like your opinions (I know it's hard as you can't see what they look like) as to which is the best bet!!
Venue A- £6654:
Whats included?
• Exclusive Use of venue from 30th Dec until 1st Jan
• Welcome drinks (Mulled wine and Hot chocolate)
• 2 course wedding breakfast
• Table wine (1/2 bottle per guest)
• Toasting drinks for speeches and midnight
• Evening buffet
• Bed and Breakfast for 12 people
• A winery tour and tasting session and evening meal can be added the night before for approx £20pp
20% deposit required upon booking

Pro’s:
• Price
• Inside Venue is beautiful
• Wedding Co-ordinater is lovely
• No concern about accommodation costs
Con’s:
• Outside isn't great for photo’s (however renovations are in progress so may be a lot better by 2017)
• Venue is quite small
• Accommodation isn't “wow”

Venue B- £10,107.50
What’s included?
• Exclusive use of the hotel on the 31st Dec
• Toast master
• Complimentary bridal suite and 2 complimentary rooms for bridal party on the 31st
• Reception drinks (Mulled wine and Hot chocolate)
• Canapes
• 4 course wedding breakfast
• Wine with meal
• Toasting drinks for speeches and midnight
• Chair covers and sashes
• Table decorations (if wanted)
• Evening DJ
• Photographer for ½ day including all photos on Disc and 30page wedding album

Pro’s:
• Includes almost everything
• Beautiful grounds for photo’s
• Accommodation available for 38 people
• Large venue with lots of different rooms available
• Guest book and pay for their own rooms directly through hotel
Con’s:
• Quote based on 65 Adult day guests (plus 35 evening guests) Children charged separately at £24.95 per child
• Hotel feels a bit run down but is still beautiful
• Rooms not available for night before the wedding
• We would have pay for any rooms not used (approx £139 per room)
• Quite far away
• I don’t like the wedding co-ordinator

Venue C- £12,250
What’s included?
• 3 night’s accommodation for up to 32 people
• Exclusive use of venue and grounds
• Welcome drinks
• 3 course Wedding Breakfast
• Evening DJ
Pro’s:
• Stunning surroundings with great photo opportunities
• Rooms chargeable at a rate we decide (can make up to £4000 if all rooms are taken)
• Amazing accommodation
• Allow to bring own wine and toasting drinks (up to ½ bottle per person)
* I love the idea of a wedding weekender
• Close to Liskeard
Con’s:
• Wedding venues are nothing special (but can be decorated to make it special)
• Evening buffet not included
• We're relying on all the rooms to be filled in order to be able to afford the venue

So what do you think would you go A B or C?
TIA!!!

I think it depends on your budget. 12k + on venue and food is quite a lot!

I think B too.

It sounds like your heart is with venue A x

If you've managed to 'talk yourself into it' and can see how everything would work etc then it must be a big contender :) I think it's a great price and it leaves you with more of your budget to play with for other things x

Why don't you get an idea of prices before going to view somewhere? Then you won't be disappointed if you love it but cant afford it?

yes a lot of places are very cagey about giving any sort of price before going to see the venue and all but venue B have put their prices up (but they have mostly been honest about this and explained why) I'm sure they do it because they are hoping that you fall in love and then don't care about the price because you instantly turn into Bridezilla and stamp your foot until the money magically appears from nowhere!!! I've been quoted as much as £19,000 for one place and that was venue only it's absolutely unreal!!!