H2b has just told me that he doesn't want to do a speech at our wedding! He said he is worried that he'll be too embarrassed after best man has done his speech. I suggested that we do the speech together to take the emphasis off just him - he wasn't keen on that idea either! Any ideas? I suppose I could do the speech but people never get my jokes!
CommentAuthorMel D
We had the groom's speech before the best man's - could you suggest that they swap them round so he doesn't have to go after the best man?
Got married Sat 28/05/2011
Renewing vows Sat 29/05/2021
We're planning WELL in advance!!
CommentAuthorbridalmiss
Yes the best man always closes the speeches, grooms' is after the father of the bride to cover the thanks etc :-)
CommentAuthorLesleys1
If he doesn't feel confident enough to make a speech, how about a pre recorded presentation (if your venue can facilitate it). I have seen it done before (the groom was terribly shy) where the bride and groom compiled a lovely video!
CommentAuthorkatie1991
My h2b ain't having a speech just going to say thanks later on in the evening before the disco xx
my h2b froze at our party last week during the thank yous, he saying hes not doing a speech so im doing it instead for us both!!!
xx
All the ways of my life id rather be with you.
Theres no way without you.
10.11.12
CommentAuthorHeLz
Does the groom HAVE to do a speech? I've always thought it was the father of the bride and best man but noone else was essential x
CommentAuthorjdnems
i know how embarrising it can be and doing it in front of everyone aint so easy
CommentAuthorbluefish
I really wasn't sure how my husband would cope with his speech duties. I thought he was quite shy and didn't trust that he'd do it without falling apart. And he didn't seem to have worried about preparing anything until the last minute. But he came up trumps. I think his Dad had a word with him about it to remind him what the parameters of the speech are, so to speak, but it was mainly his own thing. I didn't badger him too much, mainly because I had enough on my plate to orchestrate!
He's not the sort of person to memorise a speech. He just made a list of people to thank and also filled everyone in on what it was like when we first met and got to know each other - the odd things that I had forgotten. He hardly looked at the bit of paper and just talked. It was quite natural, and quite entertaining. And also quite touching, lovely to communicate how we met and what he thinks of me.
I think that the speech is the man's domain and we shouldn't try to control it or even worry about it. Probably, he will find he can cope after all. If it comes to it and on the day he can't deliver, you stand up and thank everyone for coming and working so hard to help you etc. Keep it short and get on with the party!
We gave everyone who helped with stuff art prints made by my brother and sloe gin we made - our way of thanking them for their efforts.
CommentAuthor~feebee~
My h2b isn't doing a speech, he says it will ruin the whole day for him. I suggested doing a recording but he wasn't keen on that either. His BIL who is his best man says he'll incorporate everything into his best man's speech so that's that. I used to think everything has to be spot on done by the book but as I've got older I realise it doesn't matter! ;0)
Finally Mrs Grove :)
CommentAuthorSweetchilli
My h2b isn't keen and is only going to say, my wife and I would just like to thank you all for coming to our special day and to enjoy the meal and thats about it lol
CommentAuthorbridalmiss
I went to a wedding a few years ago where my friend the groom really didn't want to say his speech, so wrote it and put it in the menu booklet on the tables instead! I understood why he wanted to opt out but it did seem to take away something from the day - I was also going out with the best man at the time, and the new bride hated him so much she refused to sit him at top table with the groom and banned him from doing a speech, which I thought was a bit harsh - however, after a couple of drinks for Dutch courage he managed to do an impromptu toast to the newly married couple anyway :-)
CommentAuthorbridalmiss
oops sorry just realised I wasnt' going out with the BM at the time of the wedding, it was the wedding where we hooked up! oh how embarrassing....he's not my H2B now either!!
