Wedding Forum - Sister...

This might be childish, but I would just say fine then... someone who would not turn up as a normal guest is not bridesmaid material in my honest opinion.

Try not to stress too much about it though hun, like you say your wedding is next year, you should be enjoying your planning and the excitement of it being next year :) don't let your mum and your sister ruin this special time for you.

Thanks girls my mum has a skill for manipulation and makin you think its all your fault. Shes really tryin to guiLt trip me and without sounding bridezilla i keep telling her its my day i choose who i want end of me and my sister wernt talkin and have only just started rebuilding pur relationship in the last few months. My partner is furious at how they are being with me bit says himself let her play her childiah games and see how far it gets her x

I mentioned on another recent post my sister threw the same wobbler when she was told her new boyfriend couldn't come to my fathers wedding because they had never met him and it was pretty much the lastest in a string of failed relationships. She said she wasn't going to come (she was actually also a bridesmaid) and she didn't... horrible to say this but did it affect the wedding?.. no. Yes my father was a bit put down she chose to be that childish but he had already made allowance for the boyfriend before that and decided to put his foot down.

You can't give in to that kind of pressure because it's wrong and your mother should know this.

I have a hard relationship with my sister too, pretty non - existent, so didn't ask her to be my bridesmaid. My mum tried to talk me around but I stood my ground. There were murmurs of her not attending so I just said "fine, in fact better she doesnt". They have not mentioned it since. I also refused to be her bridesmaid, various reasons, mainly because everyone just 'told' me I would be one, she never formally asked me and just assumed I wanted the role. We have no relationship to speak of and I don't agree with 90% of what she does, so it felt hypocritical to then be a bridesmaid. Loads more to it, but basically, family shouldn't automatically assume they will have a role, and her refusal to go unless she does it just an example of her childish behaviour and the lengths she will go to be center of attention.

Don't rise to it. Just say if she doesn't want to attend that's fine, saves you some money!

How pathetic and childish. Stick to your guns and just say thanks, saves you space at the wedding breakfast table and some money as not having to pay for her place.

If you did have her as a bridesmaid I can guarantee you will be on here next year or in a few months with a thread about what a nightmare your bridesmaid is being, not wanting this dress or trying to make it all about her.

As if she keeps asking imagine if she didn't ask you, just tell her what you've said-or just say, we've been through this-I wouldn't want her to ask me.


My fiancé's mum seemed to expect him to ask one of his brothers to be best man, she didn't kick off about it, but clearly said something to one of them as she told my fiancé that he had said he was glad he hadn't been asked anyway as he was being best man for someone else the week before.... like I said to my fiancé, he wouldn't just randomly say that, surely she asked him how he felt about it first. It was silly really as he isn't really close to either of his brothers and his mum is usually the first to say they don't have anything in common, in fact if anything she over says it-like she'll say, ''oh they're not bothered about coming around at the same time, they don't get on'' when actually although they don't see much of each other and don't share friends, they do like to see each other the odd time we are all in the same place.