I've asked my sister in law to be bridesmaid because I was bridesmaid at her wedding. However, her and my brother has split up and I don't want her to be a bridesmaid (I didn't want her to be on in the first place but asked her coz I was one for her). What way should I tell her she is no longer part of the bridal party? She will still be invited as I want my niece & nephew at our big day. Help would be much appreciated, thank you x
CommentAuthorGlitterfairy
Hmmmm tricky one really as she will only think you don't want her due to her not being with your brother anymore. It could cause upset with her coming to the wedding.
Our wedding day - 6 October 2012
CommentAuthorFlossie
I don't think there is ever an easy way to do this - just the blunt and honest trust may be the best approach. Do you think she would even expect to still be a bridesmaid now that she is technically not really a part of the close family? She may be relieved that she doesn't have to do bridesmaid duties anymore.
Happily married
18th June 2016
xx
CommentAuthorEmily17
Agree with GF need to be very careful as don't want her to go in a strop and not take your niece and nephew. Need to sit down and talk to her. maybe say cost cutting but need to be prepared for her to say she will buy he own.
Can your brother not bring the kids?
Met in 2009
He proposed Jan 2014
Will become Mrs P 7th October 2017
CommentAuthorElinor Claire
I think you will have to be honest. Could you do it in a kind letter? Maybe say that you are so sorry about the split, and you hope you can remain friends, but under the circumstances you don't feel that you can have her as a bridesmaid, and you hope very much that she will still be part of the day. Is she generally a reasonable person? The only other thing I'd be wary of is that if she is miffed about it she might cause problems with allowing the children to attend. It's a shame you felt pressured to have her, neither of my brother's wives were bridesmaids for me and I was bridesmaid to both of them. If I hadn't had quite a few others maybe I would have asked them, but with my husband's sister and four close friends I felt that I had enough.
30th August 2014 was the best birthday ever.
It was the day that I became Mrs. Dixon.
Yeah I think you just need to be honest with her and say that you enter think it's a good idea- as others have said, could your bro not take kids?
CommentAuthorInDreamland
EC
Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!
CommentAuthorSamanthaW362
hmm... agree with Elinor
CommentAuthorAmyC5215
Going through a very similar problem. Recently found out that my sister in law had an affair and they're trying to work things out don't yet know if they will even stay together. Whatever the outcome I don't think I could have her as a bridesmaid anymore as our relationship has now changed forever. I will possibly have to have the same conversation as you. Don't forget it's your wedding and you have to feel you can rely on your bridesmaid's full support, last thing you will need is drama on your day.
CommentAuthorVelcro
when is the wedding? if that were me and i was the girl in question, had i split up with my husband i would just automatically assume i wasnt in the bridal party anymore. actually, unless we were really close i'd assume i wouldn't even be getting an invite because it would be awkward
though, i am actually a bridesmaid for my exes sister next year, after me and him split (10 years ago) we remained close, actually, we ended up getting closer! I love her like she is my own sister. If you don't have that kind of relationship then i think it will be easier than you think to sort :)
Wibbly wobbly, timey wimey
*Kelbel* is my wedding twinny!
EC
