Hi everyone.Mine an my fiance s wedding is in a few days time on the 26th April. The future in laws are driveing me up the wall.
first of all my future mother in law wants to put wedding ribbon on her car as my future mother in law an father in law are taking my fiance (Their son in their Car) to the registry office.So he can get to the registry office Me an my fiance have already a nice wedding car booked already which has ribbon on .My mother in law wanting to do that sort of defeats the object of having ribbon put on the bridal car.Its like my mother in law wants to be in competition with me Im travelling in the bridal car on my own as my parents are no longer around an both passed away. I feel that it impeads on my fathers memory as he should be with me in the wedding car.With the ribbon on the front.
My sister in law (My fiance s sister) announces she is pregnant Easter bank bank holiday monday 21st April 2014 when she visited an tells me an my fiance 5 days before our wedding day that she is 13 weeks pregnant an kept mentioning it.saying to her young daughter.that i have a baby in my tummy.an I dont know why she didnt wait to announce her forthcoming baby news till after our wedding day.an whilst we are on our honey moon. I have no problem with her wanting a 2nd child.But to do it with less than a week to go till our wedding day an tell me an my fiance an over shadow over wedding.I dont think was fair an she didnt think.I dont think me an my fiance are asking much.The news came as a complete surprize.when she announced she was expecting her 2nd child. Its like mother in law an sister in law are in competition I dont like being in the limelight.
But when me an my fiance s wedding is hijacked an it sort of takes the magic out of it its kind of upsetting
CommentAuthorLauraK7
Lol no offence but I'd be grateful that your sister in law did it at Easter and not on your wedding day, most people announce it after their first scan How does h2b feel about the ribbon?
CommentAuthornatg85
Think about this... she could of announced it at your wedding! Yes you may feel that it overshadows your day but try to not let it bother you and ruin your last week and wedding day
CommentAuthorRachelE118
Maybe I misunderstood your message Debbie but I really don't think you should waste your energy worrying about ribbon. My h2b is driving himself to the venue and I'd love for someone to tie ribbon on the car then everyone will know that he's on his way!! I'm sorry to hear about your dad, mine has also passed away so instead all the bridesmaids and my son are coming in a mini bus with me....it'll be a laugh and take away that my dad isn't there. And as for your sil she might have felt that if she left it much later then she might have been showing. Please relax, enjoy the next few days and don't sweat the small stuff xxxxx
CommentAuthorDebbieW0
The thing is its not good timeing tbh.As it doesnt make our wedding day special.We have been planning our wedding since last june. My h2b dont want the ribbon as he is very shy an dont want people staring at him to the registry office an wants to be discreate an keep it low key.
To be honest these sound like quite small things and I think on the day when the important things are happening you won't notice. I can understand why it upsets you and why you feel sensitive about it, but it doesn't seem worth wasting your energy on. With the ribbon you might be better co-operating, and making sure that if there is ribbon it will match, so that the overall look is uniform. It's up to your H2B really, he might quite like the idea of travelling in a decorated car, and it does sometimes seem to me that the groom loses out, as it's only the bride that gets a grand entrance. If he doesn't want ribbon then he needs to argue it. As for the pregnancy, well perhaps she could have waited, but hopefully she and the family will be sensible enough not to draw attention to it on your big day. She might have felt it necessary to make you aware because she will presumably not be drinking, and she might have wanted to avoid any questions. It does seem very early to tell her daughter though, I would have thought that she would delay that until a noticeable bump develops, as for a child even after three months it's still an incredibly long time.
30th August 2014 was the best birthday ever.
It was the day that I became Mrs. Dixon.
CommentAuthorDebbieW0
i agree.Im happy for my future sister in law with her baby news.But timeing isnt great an hearing baby talk dont exactly thrill me. Ive been having jitters for a while.about the wedding.But when you have an over bearing future mother in law.moaning every 5 mins.it kind of makes you want to run away an elope.
CommentAuthorDonnaH39
I think you are over-reacting.
I wouldn't worry about the ribbon on the car, your MIL is thinking of your fiancé, it is your fiancé's day as well, she's just thinking about him. My MIL is going to drive our car and my FIL their car as my brother in law's are both ushers and they and their partners will be going with them, if they decided they wanted wedding ribbon on the cars... I wouldn't actually be bothered and they aren't driving me or my fiancé to the Church or venue.
As for your sister in law, 13 weeks is around the time people tend to announce they are pregnant. I'm guessing she has recently had her first scan and she probably wanted to wait until she saw you face to face to tell you. (first scans are usually around 12 weeks but I had mine at 13 weeks) she also probably didn't want to mention it on your day and may also be showing by the wedding and that would cause more of a stir on the day then her telling everyone over Easter. I also think you are being a bit harsh expecting her not to say anything anyway, I don't think I could hold it in if I were pregnant, it's hard enough not saying anything until the first scan never mind waiting a few more weeks until you are on honeymoon. She probably thought that you and your fiancé would like to know you were going to be an Auntie and an Uncle again rather then finding out when you got back off your honeymoon.
CommentAuthorElizabethF49
I think what your MIL is wanting to do with the ribbon is quite a nice idea. If my h2b is driving to our venue on the morning of the wedding His best man will have to put ribbon on our car and he can drive himself embarrassed or not lol.
As for your SIL announcing her pregnancy I think she has done the right thing telling everyone before the wedding and not on the actual wedding day. its avoids the why are you not drinking? and her telling everyone at the wedding.
Personally its up to her when she tells her daughter as someone who is struggling to have a second child I will shout it from the roof tops IF we are ever lucky enough to have one more after my 12 weeks scan and once I tell my 4 year old son. It might be a long time for a child but the little girl is her child and its up to her what and when she tells the girl.
After 7 years and 11 months he proposed to me 18.10.13
Our son is 5 years old and our world
Getting married 15.08.15.
Life hasnt been easy but we have each other :)
CommentAuthorDebbieW0
tbh..nothing has thrilled me over the wedding as nothing me an my fiance wanted as been looked at positively. My future father in law an mother in law.have been negative about our wedding from the start.an moaning how its not in a church an in a registry office an they are church goers.saying its not a proper wedding unless its in a church.an i havnt my own parents there.as they have both passed away.I sort of feel pushed an pulled around.It should be the hapiest day of my life.But it isnt.I dont think im being harsh at all.Ive never been married before an im just feeling fed up.anyone else feel like that that.That your wedding isnt your own
CommentAuthorElizabethF49
Its your wedding your decision about when and where oyu both get married. Im not getting married in a church the only person this upsets is my grandmother she is 93 years old and a very practising catholic but she rolls with the times so to speak and she is just super happy that we are getting married. It is definitely a proper wedding just because you aren't doing it in gods house means it is anything less.
It should and will be the happiest day of your life you are marrying the man your going to spend the rest of your life with. If your H2b doesn't want the ribbon then he should just tell his parents no.
The baby news for SIl is not going to overshadow your day it will be its own day on its own right. I hope you feel better soon an dI am sure your wedding day will be amazing x
After 7 years and 11 months he proposed to me 18.10.13
Our son is 5 years old and our world
Getting married 15.08.15.
Life hasnt been easy but we have each other :)
CommentAuthorElinor Claire
It sounds like these little things are bothering you because so many other things are bothering you as well. I can see how that would happen. If your MIL and FIL have been difficult about other things then even tiny things that wouldn't normally seem significant will get blown out of all proportion. Even being a Christian myself, I'd rather you get married in a registry office with a civil ceremony than go to church for the sake of someone else and do something that you're not comfortable with. Are you able to incorporate memories of your parents in any way? Even just have a photo of them with you in your bag, or have one on display in the venue somewhere. Aim for the honeymoon, when no one can bother you, and try to focus on the big picture, you and H2B will be married. Are you up to date with things enough that you can have an evening off wedding preparation and have a date night?
30th August 2014 was the best birthday ever.
It was the day that I became Mrs. Dixon.
CommentAuthorRachelE118
Awwww Debbie you should be really excited by now, not worrying. Have you got friends/family you can go and have a good wail to? Honestly it is all about you and him, so ignore the in laws and just look forward to being his 'mrs'!! xx
CommentAuthorDebbieW0
Ty. for the posts.Im having a photo of my mum an dad at the wedding post box table an set out two chairs with place names of my parents names.inlaws eh.wish mine could be more thoughtful.I look forward to my forth coming wedding but sometimes people dont think an me an my fiance want it low key an no fuss.