My family are so fragmented and disinterested in each other that I don't want to have them at our wedding. It's my 2nd marriage and I don't want to please others, just to have our day our way. Thing is, it'll be the first wedding - and is likely to be the only wedding - in my h2b's family. We were planning a 100 strong registry office with a big party / bbq reception, but now I think I want to just have our parents and my daughter with us at the registy office. Perhaps a meal after then a party locally with close family and friends at a different time. Do you think that will offend? and does it matter if it does??!! I'm fed up with trying to plan who should or shouldn't be there!!
Jo Santa
CommentAuthorlala "mod" bunni
it YOUR wedding hunni ...to Hell with offending anyone you get married the way that you 2 are happy
just remember its your day so choices are up to you. We also contemplated this but first time round for H2B so he wanted to have his family there. As far as i am concerned my family are my friends so and only having my parents and 2 sisters there from my family as well as all my friends. Much easier than trying to put all my family in one room together
Going to become Mrs Stockman
Got engaged on 26th April 2011
Getting married 19th May 2012
CommentAuthorAtaraxia
We had the same problem... we're now going to Spain and we've told everyone... we don't mind who comes or not, except for his parents and my nana and best friend... everyone else we understand if they don't come! We are having a small reception for everyone who couldnt make it when we get back to England.
Do what feels right... ask your h2b what he wants to do. When it comes down to it, it needs to be what both of you want, and he might feel like leaving his family out isn't something he wants to do. Hopefully you will find a compromise. Good luck!!! xx
Got married 27th June and blessed on July 5th 2012
Finally Mrs M :3
Love, love... Here we are.
CommentAuthorBunny
My Fiance's Sister disappeared abroad for her wedding, she told everyone she was getting married but she didnt want anyone there, to avoid arguments as the two families both have 2 sets of parents etc and it would just be awkward. She then had a party with everyone there. Its your day so i would do it how you wanted it, as she did and it was the most perfect day ever for her and her hubby. xxxx
11th August 2012, Our Perfect Day - Alot of Planning Ahead
He makes my heart go BOOM,
& my face go SMILEY!
Dispite all the problems within your family would you or the h2b regret it if you went away? If it suits you both then go ahead and do it. If either of you feel you may regret it in years to come then have another think about what is the best thing to do. You can still have the wedding where you want it here and invite his family and your friends and leave out the family members that you don't want there. If they don't like it then you can explain why they are not invited. Just because they share the same blood doesn't mean that they have to eat all your food.
CommentAuthorjo Santa
we're not planning on going far - the r. office is only about 10 miles from here, so it will be blatant that we don't want anyone there... unless i can use my shyness as the reason...
Jo Santa
CommentAuthorBunny
Thats a good idea if youre shy, blame the shyness!!! :) xxxxx
11th August 2012, Our Perfect Day - Alot of Planning Ahead
He makes my heart go BOOM,
& my face go SMILEY!
CommentAuthorXLittleMissMe!X
Personally I wouldn't make excuses I would just tell them straight that due to their behaviour towards x,y,z you don't feel comfortable and you want to enjoy your wedding day without fear of who will kick off. It might kick them into gear and make them realise how silly they are.
CommentAuthorMrsMcleish2B
Remember a lot of people realise how much of a MASSIVE nightmare a wedding can be to organise...... As I'm sure we are all finding out...... So you might be surprised by peoples reaction to your decision to keep it an intimate and special day. If they are true friends they will also support your decision and wish you well in your future together xxxxxxx Remember its YOUR day! xxxxxx
Wedding Day - 16th June 2012
CommentAuthorLiz3yy
Do you whatever you want luv it's your wedding. An Aunt of mine got married in the mid 90's, it was her second marriage and also her new hubbies second. They got hitched in Vegas! I thought it was brilliant but alot of the family got the hump saying they should have got married here and done it "properly" silly sods!
Can't wait until the day I become Mrs. Johnson :)
CommentAuthorUnknown
dont worry about other people! i said to hb about 2 months ago can we just go and get married but too much is paid now!
i really wish we had of done to save with all the stress xx
CommentAuthorJilly17
As long as you and your h2b agree and it is what you both want then go for it. I would not use excuses either but be honest and just say we are doing it the way we want it!!!
CommentAuthorKarlie1976
Jo have the day how you both want it, go where you both want to go. If it wasn't for my grandparents I would have gone off last year and got marrid abroad. Wouldn't have hesitated.
I wouldn't worry about other people. The days is all about the teo of you and thats all that matters. Even if go off anf gt wed somewhere and get back and have a party. It boils down to what you want out of your day.
It was hard for me as I am not inviting my 'sister' so I have ben the black sheep. But its my day I will invite who I want.
I am sure no matter what you choose you will have the most amazing day and one you will treasure forever. xxxxxx
Oh mitmas tree oh mitmas tree, how lovely are your branches
09/10/11 What a Fandabulous day!
CommentAuthorRachie :D
Dont tell them - our friends were married a month ago. They booked a trip on a cruise the day before they along with their parents went down to Harrogate for the day got married at the reg off then went to Bettys tea room for lunch then for a meal In the evening they went for drinks and a meal they had an amazing time - they didnt tell anyone else & no knew offended at all just really happy for them.
Have you had an engagement party? You could invite people to a party - have the ceremony howyou want then a meal & let everyone know when they turn up xxx
9th June 2012 when two worlds collide
The Crazy Cat Lady and the Transformer Man!
CommentAuthorXTeresainLoveX
I was in the same position as you, its not my first time but it is my h2b's and i for quite a while had a huge hang up about having a big do because i didn't know who out of my family would be that interested in coming to another wedding. As time has gone on i've come round to the idea of having the whole wedding breakfast and evening do. at first I was doing it for him but am now really enjoying organising it. Its working out the right way for me but you have to be happy with your decision. It is your day and you should be able to enjoy it the way you want to. Sounds nice what you are already thinking of doing. Go with your instincts honey and don't worry about anyone else xxx
CommentAuthorkimmy
Do what makes you BOTH happy !!
CommentAuthorjo Santa
Thank you all. We're still very up in the air, but it will happen. We love each other and wnt to be married. He is the rest of my life, other people come and go xx
Jo Santa
CommentAuthorAli
Go abroad, its your day and you should do as you please. H2B parents are divorced and there is a massive rift in the family - plus his mother has openly admitted to not liking me, so we're going abroad with just my parents and then will be having a party once home, for some of his family, my family and friends. So much easier and less hassle. x
Happy to be Mrs Holt, love my husband and love the memories
of our wedding day
CommentAuthorkimmy
I hope you decide on something that makes you both happy...stuff anyone else!!!
