I saw it.....it looks stunning...huge rock hehe xx

thanks ladies, the sparkle on it is amazing and when sun is shining you can see all the colours of the rainbow, its truly gorgeous but it is a heavy ring, i defo know i'm wearing it lol x

well as your ring was a gift albeit a token of his love, l think you will be able to keep it, hopefully you can work out your differences and get back on track x

Big hugs hun.

hun im sure one day ull be back on ere but this time with a man who treats u right :)
keep ur chin up and remember that ur worth so much better xxxxxxxx

HUGE HUGS Den my lovely!!
Sheesh, talk about going through the mill lately!! I hope you're alright and if you ever need an ear from an impartial party then I'm always here.
I agree with the cool, calm and collected handing him the ring back - he's either going to accept it back or tell you to keep it, either way it's of no real loss to you. And if he does tell you to keep it, leave it a few months, go pawn it and pay off your debts.
But yes, you can't put a price on your dignity and decorum.............even if it is 8k LOL
Loads of love xxx

Just seen your post! I think you have dont the right thing on all accounts. Giving the ring back and ending it. You derserve to be treated like a princess by any man. You rfeelings should always be considered and you should always be happy being with your man.
The only reason he wants the ring back is he doesnt want to wearing it while your not together, any decent man would not pass that on to another chick. it will be in his draw collecting dust or he will sell it.

You newver know, absence makes the heart grow stonger and he might realise how much of a dic he is being and want to sort it out in a few weeks.
Better you found out now what he is like then being stuck married to him.

All the best babe, big hugs x x

Oh hun, sometimes I hate it when my sixth sense comes into play, but somehow this doesn't feel like the end!!!

Hi Den1fd

I am not writing about your ring but about your (ex) man. I feel a bit sorry for him, let me explain why before you shout at me. I had a terrible first marraige and despite over 7 years of divorce and my ex having a new life he has persisted in using anything inc my child to try to destroy my life because I left. I was, until I met h2b a real victim, my ex's continued attacks were humiliating, depraved, seriously threatening and despite police and courts and solicitors unstoppable. I was emotionally & physically bereft and could not put anyones feelings before mine I lived in a nightmare and I had 2 or 3 attempts at relationships but I only knew 1 way to react to things and it was destructive. I did the eff off to h2b once and he told me straight that it would never happen again that I had to stop living in the drama of my past relationship and realise this was new or that would be that. At first I thought well sod off then you dont know what I've been through but I realised that my past was ruining my future. I had panic attacks, lived on antidepressants and would be hysterical half of the time - it was a big wake up call. I went for CBT - cognitive behavioural therapy because I couldnt change what my ex did only how I reacted to it. I have very few panic attacks these days and I have withdrawn under medical supervision from the anti-depressants, it has been hard, long and slow but I am now moving on with my new life without all that baggage. I dont know how long your ex has been away from his partner but you have referred to her as the bitter ex so I guess she makes things difficult for him and I guess there are kids, plus he has his own business. There are lots of reasons he may have been under pressure from all sides, you are very fortunate that you and your ex are friends but it really is the exception. I think your ex was probably seeking a bit of escapism in the beer when he lost it with you and there is no excuse for that. If you can please encourage him to go talk to someone professional about what he is going through, men are strange about counselling but there are life coaches and all sorts of resources on the web now. Print this off if you think it will help and put it in with his things when he collects them. Even if it is too late for your relationship it sounds like he needs to do something different in order to move on and don't hate him for having not been able to do that yet it is not that he doesnt love you enough it is just that he probably hasnt realised what effect he is having on those around him because you cant see further than yourself when it is happenning to you. I hope you find your Mr Perfect, whether it is your current man changed or someone in your future and I wish you all the luck in the world, both of you.

In part I agree with kitkat. Yes, I think if it's all down to his stress, problems from the past etc then he should seek help in dealing with it.

From my own POV - my ex (Honey's dad, told you about his psycho ex wife last week) was all about living in the past. His divorce came about because he is/was a serial cheat and a consumate liar, she had enough and took off with his best friend, except he had his own little version of what happened, namely he'd been Snow White and she was a slap per, that story worked well because obviously she'd taken up then married said best friend - but she lived in the past as well which made things extremely difficult. In some weird way in their minds they were still married to each other (kinda hard to explain) they were always on the phone to each other, in the early days she lived literally a few doors down.
You know of a couple of the accusations brought against me, well that was just a tiny fraction of it. She threatened to run me over while I was pregnant, she rang the police and told them I'd wrecked her car and smashed her shed window, when Honey was born I got "Well I hope the little b*tch dies of cot death".............nice woman LMAO!! At one point she said if Steve didn't leave me and force me to have an abortion then he'd be denied access to their son *sigh*
Anyway, Steve, being the total douchebag he is never once spoke up to her about any of it. I threatened to get the police involved and guess what? He had the phone disconnected and hid my mobile while he was at work so I couldn't ring them. Angry isn't the word for how I felt that day!!
My point is (there is one you see hehe) You can take so much of a person living in the past, you can do your best to help, you can empathise, you can work on making the present exactly that..........what you can't do is tolerate it to the point where it begins to seriously affect you. If your partner is not willing to compromise and seek help then you might as well call it a day - a relationship is a 2 way street, you could die from giving and bending for your other half, but if they're not willing to give and bend back then you're fighting a losing battle and all you get for your efforts is to be in a worse position than when you started :(
I was on temazepam because of what I went through, also had 18 months worth of counselling, made me strong enough to realise that there is no man on the planet worth that level of rubbish!!

If you've already been done this road before Den then personally I'd just count my losses and keep on walking. Out there is someone who DOES want to compromise, who DOES consider your feelings, who DOES love you with all their heart and will not make you live with the ghosts of their past.
As for "No-one will ever love you the way he does" - sorry, I had to snigger, I don't think that's the way you deserve to be loved, so good, be glad that no-one will ever love you like that :P

hugs, hugs, more hugs and a couple of little smooches xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

kerrylou thanks hun god what an awful woman, havent they heard of dignity!! i should remind him of that if he texts again that if thats how he loves then he can keep it!!

he came for it all whilst i was at school. he's gonna return rest of my stuff when he has time, he said it was rushed when he came over from work so didnt have time to get it all. think he just made decision to come, got couple of things from home, jumped straight in van and came. oh well. just to rub it in i wrapped ring in tissue paper, placed it in ps i love you dvd, put a little note in about how stubborn he is and that i cant tolerate it anymore and sprayed the bag with my perfume ha ha. just to remind him of what he's lost.

he's text a few times since but nothing to report, usual stuff he's coming out with. gonna leave it for few days to see what life is like without me.

feel down about it but no point in going over and over it is there xx

p.s I love you is such a sad film :-( x