okay so ive finally started organising me hen do along with my maid of honour! I have 5 bridesmaids in total, 2 of them of h2bs closest mates.....
With me being a geordie i didnt wanna go too far away from home so ive went for manchester £160 for coach, hotel, all meals, some drinks and lots and lots of diff activities (plus a goodie bag for all people on the hen do)
I had 11 people say YES straight away including 2 girls i havent seen in years which im sooo amazed about!
Then comes the 2 bridesmaids of mine that are his mates........
1 told me shes hoping to be pregnant by that time and couldnt afford it anyways.... 1 had a right go at me saying "it may not be a lot of money to you but its a hell of a lot of money to me" My response to her was "ive neva stated its not a lot of money but everyones known about this since january this year and everyone else has been saving up"
SO THEN i find this message on my computer that shes sent to my h2b.
"wot is this facination wiv havin a hen do up north? iv been tryin 2 find ways of gettin up 2 urs n its so expensive (thats if amy dont come) nics given me the price of how much it is for this wkend shes got planned n then iv got another £100 odd 2 put on top of that just 4 travle, n i dont want her gettin the hump wiv me coz she finks i aint making an effort. i cant tell u anymore about it obviously as iv been sworn 2 secrecy lol, but i no i sound a bit selfish but i really dont fancy payin out loadsa money 4 sum where thats cold n sh*t e.g england lol. if im guna pay out a lot of money 4 a wkend event thats 4 sum 1 else it would have 2 b worth my while :p. anyways hope ur all gd bezzy n ur foot is ok, luv ya n miss ya muchly xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx "
I AM FURIOUS and so is my h2b!
1st of all the facination with it being up north is that ive lived here all my life and me and my h2b currently have a life up here..... 2nd of all how dare she say its not worth her while - shes my bridesmaid ffs! 3rd of all shes proper sucking up to him saying she misses him etc etc but in 1 year and a half not one of his mates has come up and visited us up north! 4th of all how dare she say its going to be sh*t she doesnt even know whats planned....
ahhhhhhhhhh im sooooooooo annoyed
and to top it all off in the space of a cuolpe of months ive lost my great grandad, my uncle AND my grandad.... so i just cant be doing with all of her sh*t tbh!
Going to see them this weekend (as well as his family) and im absolutely dreading it!
Shes even refusnig to speak to my h2b on the phone
UGH she does me head in!!!!!!!!!!!
xx
Happily Married! :) xxx
CommentAuthorammo
i know what u mean 3 months ago i had 12 that all said they would come to the hen weekend at £150.well the desopit was due on the 1st and only 5 people paid.i am so pissed off cos they all knew it had to be paid 3 months ago and all said yes.so fuck them. i would mind but one off them is my own sister. hope u sort it out soon.xxx
CommentAuthorTerribabylove
She sounds a bit stuck up, id travel miles regardless on price to be a family member wedding and a close friends wedding, dont understand some people. Hope its sorted soon hun xx
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CommentAuthorb2bnicola
I hope so too! I just can't be bothered with it all!
If they were that bothered about being my bridesmaid they should be doing anything at all to make sure that they can come! xx
Happily Married! :) xxx
CommentAuthorJane
Can I just ask how much the hen night is costing? Just so we know what sort of sum she is getting hot under the collar about?? x
Thing is we know that aint started saving for our wedding, so god knows how theyre going to afford the accommodation for 2 nights! I have a horrible feeling that they wont end up coming and that'll mean 2 bridesmaids down, 1 best man down and 2 page boys (h2bs godsons) down!
:(
xx
Happily Married! :) xxx
CommentAuthorb2bnicola
£160 it is Which i dont think is that bad considering whats included!
Shes saying that a train there is gonna cost her £100s but how can she can get prices when the trains arent released until 12 weeks before departure
x
Happily Married! :) xxx
CommentAuthorpixie.bunny
If she has known about it since January, she's had more than enough time to either save for it or say nicely she just couldn't afford it. The message to your H2B was out of order to be honest stating how the night would be sh1t etc. Bad bridesmaid Xx
CommentAuthorb2bnicola
Exactly!
Wish i cud just sack them both off! Cos theyre not even going to come up north to get their dresses!
Just cba with them at all!
xx
Happily Married! :) xxx
CommentAuthorpixie.bunny
She don't deserve the BM title with her attitude imo, it would be more deserving to people who can commit time etc. to you, who do not go behind your back and slate your night. *hugs* Xxxxx
CommentAuthorCroc
do you what i really feel for you, this is why i am only having my 2 sisters as my bm as i would seriously knock one out if they had done that. and the whole reason am paying for the hen night, they can just pay for there drinks. sometimes peoiple are just selfsh human nature i guess. but sometimes people say oh yes ill come for get then realise a few mths before they havent saved and their skint. try not to let it dampen your mood at the end of the day am sure you will have loadsa fun on your hen night with or without her xx
"better a witty fool, than a foolish wit" shakespeare
CommentAuthorXLittleMissMe!X
I can understand her not being able to afford it and that point is fair enough as I couldn't justify spending that amount of money on some one's hen night no matter how close I was to them. I just don't have that kind of money to splash out (as much as I would love to) The bit that I find bad is the way she has gone about it. Like you say she is having a go about your hen night saying its going to be pants rather than just saying she would love to go but just can't spend that kind of money. I guess she thought sending your h2b a message would let him know that she wasn't trying to be a cow towards you but it has backfired on her with what she has put. I think you guys need to talk to her or you will find that it eats away at you and if you don't sort it out you won't feel right on the day having her as a bridesmaid.
CommentAuthorb2bnicola
The thing is though she has the money, thats the most annoying thing about it!
She goes out clubbing twice a week every week. Goes clothes shopping every week etc etc
So i know she can afford it, its just obv not about her so she cant jusitfy spending that money but shes my bridesmaid at the end of the day, and theyve had since january this year to save up!
Whole thing just drives me mental!
How can people be so nasty?
Happily Married! :) xxx
CommentAuthorpixie.bunny
As they're own selfish ways get in the way of others enjoying themselves. *hugs* Xxx
CommentAuthorXLittleMissMe!X
If that is the case that she has money and just doesn't want to spend it then I wouldn't be happy at all either. You need to get it out your system with her or you will be thinking about what a cow bag she is walking down the aisle with you which is the last thing you want.
CommentAuthorGregorysGirl
I woul drop her like a hot brick, she doesn't deserve to be your bm and if she is your h2bs mate and even he is annoyed I doubt he would mind much either. And as for not even coming to get her dress, that would be the clincher to me to sack her!! My best mate is my bm and she drove me from Grantham to Darlington just to have a look at my wedding dress and would do it again if I asked her too. She is taking her role seriously as I knew she would. And £160 is not a lot of money when she has had 11 months notice, not even £20 a month, surely anyone can do that??? I am sorry for you that you have such a selfish girl to deal with and hope it can be sorted out. xx
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CommentAuthormrsbeal2be
where does she live? £100s on train fares?
i would say if you dont want to come then dont its your loss, would she really make much a big difference to your hen night anyway? i know you want her there otherwise you wouldnt of invited her but is she really worth all this stress and hassle? im sure she would make the effort if she thought being a bm was important but obviously she doesnt. hope you sort it out.xx
CommentAuthorclareabella
well hun id say rollocks 2 her
ooooo muchly love my mr c fletcher
CommentAuthorMrs Turps (Nicpep)
I think £160 is a bit steep, esp now we are all starting our xmas shopping. She might just be a bit embaressed that she cant find the money, cos I assume things like drinks etc in the eve are on top. for example, mine was £50 each for day activity, food and accomodation.
Did you warn her that it would be that much? Although the "up north" comment is stupid, of course you should have the hen do where you live!!!
18-09-10
Now a married lady :)
Im a rebel me
CommentAuthorMrs Brakes
I've just had a similar thing with my lot. Booked now for next October £30 deposit now then £10 / 15 per month pays for everything for 3 night hen weekend. Deadline was 31/10 and despite 90% of people telling me they were coming, most dropped out Monday morning (01/11). The reason - it's too early! You can't win either way.
Got married 11/11/11.
CommentAuthorGregorysGirl
How can it be too early, do they not see that a hen night is a pretty important occasion in its own right?! And to wait to see what they might be doing that weekend.....well seeing as you have invited them on a hen night, isn't that what should be pencilled in to their diary??? Confusing stuff.
Finally reunited with the love of my life
Never to part again
This Saturday I will finally be Mrs Codling!
CommentAuthorljeh92
i know that if she was my BM i would be telling her where to go.. How selfish and cruel!
Soon to be Mrs Laura Naylor !!
24th June 2011
CommentAuthorRelfy
If she knew how much is was gonna cost in jan then she is bang out of order! If she can't afford it then fair enough , in sure if that was the case and she was honest then you would understand ... The problem here that she doesn't think it'd worth while... If being a bm is not worth whe enough then I would sack her for it... Chin up babe !! Xxx
CommentAuthorEmsy5000
hugs she should not of said those things in those ways.
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its spelt wrong
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CommentAuthorlelbel1
I wouldn't even want her to be my bridesmaid. x
CommentAuthorRachie :D
Without being rude I dont see Manchester as that North its more midlands to me lol - anyway back to the bm for starters leave her to h2b - if she's his mate he can sort her and tbh if they dont want to go to your hen do thats fine you'll have a better time without them xxxx
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