One of my Bridesmaids is 16 (at the mo) and is my Mums God Daughter. I am very very close to her and she is like a little sister to me.

Her mum left her dad 5 years ago and she lived with her mum to begin with. 3 years ago after she decided to move back with her dad by sneaking all of her belongings out the house when her mum was out and leaving a note (this is at 13 yrs old!) Her Dad has bags of money and had threatened to cut her off if she stayed with her mum.

Her mum did have an affair behind her dads back but to be fair to my Godmother she was in a very very awful relationship with my Godfather and it was a mentally abusive relationship that the kids didnt know about. She has since married the man she had the affair with and is soooo happy.

My problem is the bridesmaid in question is constantly slating her mum and being so rude. She leaves comments on my fb about her and is constantly slagging her off on msn to me and whenever she see's me its all she does. She has even gone as far as saying she wishes her dead. She said she didnt want to go to the wedding if her mum went yet still wanted to be a bm and could she just come to the ceremony be a bm and then go home if her mum was still there or could i ask her mum not to come at all??? I told her where to go she's either all there or not at all and its up to me and Rich who we invite.

Rich wanted to tell her to get knotted there and then I said to give her another chance. I made it perfectly clear if she dare say 1 little thing about her mum (in a nasty way) she would no longer be bridesmaid.

Well tonight she's left a really beotchy comment about her mum on my fb and started slating her mum down msn to me. So ive had a right go blocked her and removed her off my fb.

How dare she? She is 16 years old and I will not be dictated to by a child. Im gonna ring my mum tomorrow and let her know my Godfather and bm are no longer welcome. Rich agrees and im so upset - I love my Godmother so much - she was the one person (apart from rich) who was really there for me when my nana died - especially the night i couldnt cope n e longer and cried in her arms for 3 hours solid.

Sorry mega mega long rant but im furious xxx

omg fair play to u for telling her were to go its your wedding and its ment to be the best day of your life so u dont really want to be watching over your shoulder that a argument will start through out the day puttin u on edge all day thats just not fair to u!!!

I can see/understand why you are so angry/upset. I completely agree with you that it has to be all or nothing....... Planning a wedding is har enough without the whole "if she's going i'm not"! I can't be doing with people like that! It sounds to me like you have done the right thing...... However is there no way you can try and sort things out, it sounds like you were all pretty close at on point...... I hope you can move on from this and have no more upset hun, and you know you always have us ladies to talk to (hee heee) :) xxx

You are very welcome hun, it's always good to get it off your chest :) xxx

You know, Sophie has a very good point. How did she behave before moving to her dads? x

I feel sorry for the poor girl- sounds like shes been poisoned into hating her mother by her father. But your right- she has no right to make demands over your guest list.

She sounds a very troubled girl and I agree with the other girls that it sounds as though she has been poisoned and her young mind twisted which is very sad but nothing to do with your wedding. if you are a big support for her maybe dont cut her off but give her very clear firm boundaries about whats acceptable and spell out the consequences if she breaks them, it doesnt sound like she has been taught whats ok and what isnt xxx

well done :)

Sorry I should have re read what I'd written prior to posting - I didnt have a go at her on facebook - she was on msn f-ing and blinding at me so i asked her very politely to respect my feelings and not to do this. She had also written something on my fb about her mum which i didn't agree with. So I told her Id had enough and she needed to grow up and get on with it via msn. I deleted the post ref her mum on fb deleted and blocked her then did the same with msn. To me just telling her that is having a right go at her.

My Dad and her dad had dinner last night and I feel bad as my Dad is walking away from the whole situation to. Nothing to do with what happened between me and her. But her Dad was sat doing the same thing as her and like my Dad said he is friends with my God Mother as well and could he refrain from his extremities which he refused to do. My Father has told him not to put our family in the middle of it as he doesn't want to know.

I find it so sad that someone could have so much anger in them and not realise what they are doing not only to themselves but other people. I do wish her well and hope she can get through it but as for me its been a turbulent 5 years and I need to put other things 1st.

I actually feel so much better and very very calm about it all - its a bit weird

Sounds like youve tried what you can so thats prob why your at peace with your decision, hope thats the last of your stress! x