i have a group of friends who i will be inviting to our big day, most of them are single but we are all really close so it wouldnt be an issue to not give them a plus 1, however most of my OHs mates have wives or long term GFs, which i dont mind inviting, but he has a couple of mates who are single, do we give them a plus 1? personally i dont think we should, but do people feel put out by it??
CommentAuthorMel D
We invited single people and gave them plus 1s - I don't think there was one person that used it! If you don't want to, don't - they shouldn't be put out, especially if there will be people there that they know xx
Got married Sat 28/05/2011
Renewing vows Sat 29/05/2021
We're planning WELL in advance!!
CommentAuthorcharlottelee
none of our single friends are getting plus 1 except 1 and that because they dont know anyone. If they know each other dont see why they should need a plus 1. we have said if nearer the time there is room then a possibility but not on initial invites
Going to become Mrs Stockman
Got engaged on 26th April 2011
Getting married 19th May 2012
CommentAuthorIgnition
We have a lot of my H2B friends who are single, we are giving them plus ones. xxxx
Can't wait to be Mrs Mansfield
Having a Fun Fair Reception
It's going To Be Awesome
Roll On The 15th September 2012
CommentAuthorKaz
We're only doing plus 1's if they've been together a while, as I don't want a room full of people I don't know! But it does depend on your numbers, if the venue says it has a max no. or your budget isn't gonna cover it, don't think I'd like to pay out for a load of strangers to eat lol xx
we have given everyone a plus1 as we thought some of them may not want to come on their own, but told us to inform us if they were coming on their own for numbers :)x
I have know my soulmate for 27 years and on the 6th August
I married him and became Mrs Garnham.
It was most definitely the happiest day of my life.
I love married life !!!!
CommentAuthorJenR101
I have accounted for plus ones at this stage but have told my close friends that by time the invites go out if they arent in a steady relationship I would use there plus ones for other people (we are only having 50 during the day) and all of them are fine with this. xx
CommentAuthorMrsMcleish2B
Most of my H2B's Army mates are single and we haven't given them +1's at the moment purely because we no they wouldn't use them xxx
Wedding Day - 16th June 2012
CommentAuthorSpecialSundae
We're being mean and only inviting people's partners if they're serious and we know their name. So no random plus ones and no new partners. We're going to struggle to keep within our fairly generous numbers as it is, plus ones for everyone would be insane!
CommentAuthorjanetx71
we are only inviting them both if they have been together a while i dont want a room full of people i dont know as well as paying to feed them xxx
CommentAuthorKaz
MIL2B keeps coming up with names even H2B doesn't reconise so they aren't coming!
WARNING:
I say the first thing I think of!
CommentAuthorLiza247
edited
Were not giving any of our guests plus 1s due to not wanting people at my wedding who I don't really know n our numbers are already rather high. Everyone who is coming knows one another too
CommentAuthorPaula
If they are not currently in a relationship I wont be giving them a plus 1 x
CommentAuthorkimmy
We are not giving plus 1's if all the singles come alone then we can match them up :D
CommentAuthorMrs Brakes
edited
I've invited a group of girls from school that got back in touch via facebook. I told them yesterday at one of our nights 'no partners, no kids'. They will come as a group so all know each other. One said she was glad it was no partners as her oh can look after their son. My personal rule on this is if we know both of them - they both come. If we only know 1 but they don't know any / many others - plus 1, if we only know one and they are either family or friends with lots - no plus 1. We have neither the space nor money for strangers. I don't know why but, people have this idea that a wedding invite is automatically for them and all their family. The most important it is, It's only 1 night. People must go out without their oh and or kids once in a while!
Got married 11/11/11.
CommentAuthorlala "mod" bunni
if our guests aren`t in a long standing relationship where we at least know thier name then they cant bring a partner.
i am being invited to a recption in oct where mr lala isnt invited (as far as i know)...
A friend of mine got so hung up over plus 1's that I nearly missed out on her actual wedding. She only had space for 2 people and wanted to invite me and another single childless girl. As I wouldn't then have been able to bring my new boyfriend, who she'd never met, or my son, who she is quite close to, she thought I'd take offence and not want to go. So many so called friends had kicked off at not being able to bring people that she didn't want to risk losing / ruining another friendship. It was only when I rang her in the week leading up to the wedding to ask if she had everything and needed any help that she told me why she hadn't invited me to the ceremony. I told her 'stuff the others, if you want me there, I'll be there. I'd love to come' I went to the day on my own, went home for tea and then came back in the evening with now fiancé and Scott.
Got married 11/11/11.
CommentAuthorKinkyemo
the only +1's we are allowing to the day is Karls friend who has to stay for the weekend as she is comng from lincolnshire Thats it for the day! For the night people can bring a friend I dont mind but they are only allowed one friend! we have had a couple ask if 2 or 3 of their friends can come and i said NOOOOOO
I did have a problem as with numbers having to keep to 40 people for the day and I have a large family I had said people Boyfriends couldnt come not even the ones I knew unless I or Karl were close to them and when my mum heard this she went ape s**t at m! saying 'one day he might be my brother in law' yeah so could prince harry but dont mean Im inviting him LOL now Ive had to say some of my friends cant come to allow for boyfriends to come to the day not too happy but not much I can do
CommentAuthorNishaVyas88
We only allowed plus ones for friends who were in relationships. The only exception to this was a school friend that kept bugging me about having a plus one because he won't know anyone (despite going to school with me and most of my friends) and I gave up telling him to stuff it. Also another friend who's bringing a mate I've not met. In defence of this, I originally invited her boyfriend but they broke up and we had the seat spare. Also, unlike the school friend, she actually hasn't met most of my friends (she only knows my h2b and one of my friends).
We also gave plus ones to my h2b's teenage cousins, mostly because I remember going to massive weddings as a teenager and wishing I could have brought my BFF to talk to rather than sneakily text her all evening. None of them are bringing plus ones anyway.
CommentAuthorlozzatea
i am going to make a stand- like some of you lovely ladies said: i dont want a load of strangers at my wedding- can you imagine looking back at your photos, and thinking, whos that? x
CommentAuthorMrs Brakes
I'm going to be doing that with some people in my OH's huge family! His mum's cousins, childrens, children are invited to the evening 'or they'll be upset'. Apparently ' And?!? They'll be being upset 300 miles away' is not the reaction to have. Oh well!
Got married 11/11/11.
CommentAuthorSteph-Hughes-2b
those who have a partner will get the plus one, but those who are single, with the limit on guest list size they will have to come alone, again they know other people attend and can get to know other people i'm sure, if i had the money then i would give everyone a plus one, but i just can't :(
CommentAuthorocean
i've got this dilema too, although i'm not looking at it as a dilema....
H2B's cousins are mostly all late teenage, early 20's some have g.f's some don't.
I'm going on the thoughts that if H2B's grand parents haven't met their parteners they don't get an plus 1.
Its annoying me a little as at the moment my guest list is up to 92 in the day but with the prospectus of 7 of his cousins and 2 of our best mates having parteners by then bumps it up to 101 :s -
Also ladies and gents, are you inviting children &babies to the day, as there is a possibility for 6 couples to have a child or a second child by the time my wedding date comes around.
OMG - *bangs head against wall* - i think the guest list and plus 1's etc is one of those things which is last to finalise!
CommentAuthorGazza 122
We had this issue also - for starters, we are only inviting the children from our immediate family. Even my Bm'skids are not invited, that way there is no favouritism shown. We are no t dishing out the plus 1's either, i have left a space next to a good mate of mine who has recently split up with her man, but sat wirth a group of mates with their hubbies, so i did say she can bring a friend or someone so she dont feel left out really xxx but thats it. xxx
CommentAuthorOfficially Mrs M
day guests haven't got plus 1's apart from two, one is OH's grandad who changes girlfriends all the time and the other is OH'S friend from down south who is making a weekend out of it so is bringing a boyfriend at the time or friend which she is going to let me know who they are at a later date (don't want to print the table plan etc and it be wrong)
evening guests i haven't put plus 1's on but most have rung and asked if they can which i've just said yea go ahead
8th September 2012 I married my best friend
1st September 2014 our little family grew by one
Women are made to be loved, not understood. - Oscar Wilde
CommentAuthorGazza 122
omg! lol Bm's skids! hahahaha! i ment BM's kids! xx oopsie
CommentAuthorlala "mod" bunni
we haven't really had this problem as we are having a no children wedding and have been very clear about this from day one also when it comes to the question of oh`s... we have said to a couple of our day guests that their oh is welcome to come to the evening ... but bc this has been said one to one no one else knows so cant stress over the fact that theirs isn't invited.
No-one is getting a +1 if we don't know them - and some friends we've invited our main friend but not their OH or children if we're not close to them, and all are coming saying they value the break!
CommentAuthoremmaaa
If they know people there and aren't going to be on their tod all day, then no way shoud you feel obliged to give them a plus one, that's the only reason I'd let anyone bring anyone I didn't know they weren't in a long term relationship with. To be honest, I really don't understand this obsession with everyone having to bring their partners to weddings if the bride and groom don't know them, they're not surgically attached! H2b would have missed out on his friends ceremony if I had been able to go, because there wasn't room for both of us, but in the end I went to my friend's wedding and he went to his and went to the whole day, instead of just the evening. I feel quite resentful about our evening guestlist being bloated by people we don't know, but then I'm a pretty antisocial sod!
CommentAuthormillz090
We are only inviting plus 1's for people that wont know anyone... like i have a male friend from school who is coming and we keep in touch via text but having seen each other for years but he would feel akward coming on his own as not know anyone else so he will be getting a plus one invite. I have a group of guys from work but only inviting them and not their partners, i barely know them and figured they know each other so wont be lonely.
Finally marrying the love of my life !!
10th August 2013 - 9 years to the day we met !
CommentAuthorowlgirl2015
Im so glad that i have found this thread i am not sure what to do as we are trying to finish our guestlist and want to really keep it to a certain number of guests but if we add plus ones to certain friends and family members who have just assumed they can take a plus one even though they are single that we will have to not invite around 6 people who are really close friends that we do want to be there :/ x
25th of july 2015 i marry my soulmate:) x
CommentAuthorlala "mod" bunni
tell those moaning to bog off ....... why should you pay for someone you have never met
For our blessing we will only be giving people plus ones if we have actually met their other half, or if there long term etc.. We only want family and close friends xx
Mrs Lunn
08/05/12 was the best day of my life
& I love my husband with all my heart xxxx
CommentAuthorMrsMarr2B
We are only having plus ones for them that we know have been together for a long time, therefore meaning we at least know there names. I wouldn't want to be paying all that money for people we do not know xx
Mrs Marr 2 b!!! Can't blooming wait!!
10-11-12 can't come quick enough :)
CommentAuthorLinzi-jo
We are only giving plus ones to those that do not know anyone else. All the ones we do know will have their names on the invites! lol and we have a lot of kids coming from oh's family (they are all greek so very family orientated) and we have the same problem as you Ocean. We found out the other day that his cousin is now expecting another child and his aunt has just had twins and with 2 and a half years to go, there may end up being many more!! OH's parents dont seem to understand that venues can only hold a certain amount of people and nearly all of our budget is having to go on the venue because of the large numbers we already have. They keep wanting to invite more people, some who I and h2b have never met but because they are family they say it is rude to not invite them! I am already pulling my hair out and still have 2 and a half years to go! By the time it gets to the wedding I will need a wig as I will be bald from where I have pulled all of my hair out! lol xxx
Got together 14.02.2008
Got engaged 31.12.2010
Will become a Mrs on 30.08.2014 xxxxxx
CommentAuthorsamitrev2B
We having NO plus 1s cant afford.to.feed.strangers and the ones.who.r.coming on their own are sitting with chatty friendly ppl :) xxx
Engaged: Christmas Eve 2009
Hen Party Saturday 28th April 2012
Wedding: Saturday 16th June 2012
and can't wait to be Mrs Trevillion :)
CommentAuthorocean
Oh Linzi-Jo i feel your pain i really really do!
My budget is surrounded by the biggest bloody venue, all because of the maoosive family h2b has! and the never ending possibility of cousins having parteners or more bloody babies!!!!!!!!!! hahaha!!!!!!!!!!
CommentAuthorLinzi-jo
Oh I know Ocean! I will most probably have had a visit from the men in white coats by the time that wedding gets here! xxx
Got together 14.02.2008
Got engaged 31.12.2010
Will become a Mrs on 30.08.2014 xxxxxx
CommentAuthorhello-kitty
im having only people named on the invite as our budget is tight as it is and dont fancy spending more money on food for people we dont know. it's all down to choice and your personal budget xx
best day of my life to come 10th November 2013
Weight atm 11st
weight i was when we first met 8st
only 3 stone to lose -_-
CommentAuthorMrs Badger
We are only inviting long term partners and a plus one for one guest who doesn't know anyone else there, those who are single are not getting plus ones. H2b thinks that his brother should have one, but he doesn't have a partner and knows other people there, so we're in disagreement.
Now a Mrs!
"..I've seen the best and the worst of you and I understand
with perfect clarity exactly what you are. You're a hell of
of a woman. You're the one..."
It's such a tricky one! Have tried to avoid inviting +1s I've never met but some are wives/husbands/fiances etc so feel like I can't not invite them, especially to the evening do! I totally agree that we can't afford to be feeding strangers but I just feel obliged to invite partners. Have drawn the line at boyfs/girlfs I've never met or partners friends have gained since we booked the wedding! x
Met Paul on 01.06.08
Marrying him on 01.06.12
CommentAuthorJanie
we are putting an insert into the invitations saying that whilst plus 1's will be considered, anyone "obtaining" a new partner once the invitations are sent out MAY not be able to bring them, as we are restricted on numbers. My cousin INSISTED on brigning one to my brothers weding years ago, she had been with this lad one week, shoved him in all the famly photo's insisting he was in them as he was family, two weeks later they broke up and we havent seen him since! I am therefor hesitant to add plus 1's unless theyve been in a relationship long term. I think it can spoil fmaily photo's if later on you end up with someone in your photo's who nobody talks to anymore.
Remember : To the world you may be just one person,
BUT to one person you may just be THE WORLD x x x
CommentAuthorclbronze
Very good point Janie, hadn't even considered photos, was thinking only about numbers and cost! We're really restricted on numbers- only allowed 40 during the day, and I'd really begrudge having a randomer who's having a fling with one of my friends in place of someone I really want there! x
Met Paul on 01.06.08
Marrying him on 01.06.12
CommentAuthorMrscarter2b
We are having no plus 1's for the day as it's 50 ph but I've invited them to the evening reception. I'm also allowing plus 1's for the guests invited to the evening and everyone seems fine with that. x
CommentAuthorJanie
just say no to any plus 1's then, youre only allowed a small number of guests,a nd as you say you want people there who mean soemthing to you, not people you dont know
Remember : To the world you may be just one person,
BUT to one person you may just be THE WORLD x x x
CommentAuthorocean
I spoke too soon about my guest list increasing!!!!
since i last posted two of our family friends have announced pregnancies!!!! FFS!!! it's gunna carry on this aswell! lol :'(
xxx
