Best man has been telling h2b to make sure he doesn't misplace his passport for his stag do...and h2b thinks he's going to Barcelona for it next yr or somewhere similar, a few of the groomsmen keep going on about abroad to.... Am I the only one that's thinking level headed and think that cos we're saving for a wedding and want a really good honeymoon that its just gonna cost a ridiculous amount to go there for 4-5 days?? We've had countless arguments about it and I've even said if he goes abroad for it when I've decided I'm having mine here to keep costs down that the wedding will be off (and I'm serious!) ... He's now told best man he doesn't want to know where they're going... Obv so he can't hold any blame if they go abroad... I just think it's a little unfair esp as the price for Barcelona is about £500 without any spending money.... Am I being unreasonable or should I just grin n bear it?
Velcro...my wedding day twinny! The Two Kel's!
Got engaged 14/10/12 in Central Park NYC!
Became Mrs Macdonald 13th September 2014
Mummy to 4 girlies and baby blue boy Due 10/05/2016
CommentAuthorSianyCaitlin
I don't think you're being unreasonable at all !! If you're having your hen do here to keep the cost down then surely the best man can appreciate that & do the same?? Although men are not as considerate & thoughtful as women, or money conscious !! Does the best man know the situation etc? If I was in that position, I would be exactly the same, you're only going to do this once so you want to make it as special as possible & that takes money! x
Got together 06/07/2009
Got engaged 16/07/2012
I marry my best friend 08/06/2014
Can't wait to be Mrs Sharp x
CommentAuthor*KelBel*
Maybe I'll talk to him,it's difficult cos he works in Australia,he's bk at the min til the end of this month then goes bk so a lot of the planning will be napping from auz... I think if he had a choice,he'd just get them to all fly there,(no joke!) doesn't help that h2b hasn't been on a stag do.... He also thinks my dad and his dad shouldn't be invited which I think they should....
Velcro...my wedding day twinny! The Two Kel's!
Got engaged 14/10/12 in Central Park NYC!
Became Mrs Macdonald 13th September 2014
Mummy to 4 girlies and baby blue boy Due 10/05/2016
CommentAuthorAmyP7
Well my h2b is going abroad on his stag do. I'm very annoyed but it was booked and I had to like it or lump it. I think he was very selfish to be honest as I'm paying for most of the wedding and I'm having mine here if I have one at all to keep costs down. Also he went abroad twice last year on stag weekends so I had to pay for our holiday as we wouldn't have been able to go at all. If he's anything like my h2b there won't be any talking to him x x
CommentAuthorJoanna
I don't think you're being unreasonable. Why spend lots of money on a stag or hen do when that money could go towards your wedding or honeymoon? Unless you've got loads of money to spare, i wouldn't do it. Also, i think both dads should be at the stag do, but i guess that's up to them to decide. xxx
The greatest thing you'll ever learn
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I'm going to play devil's advocate here. A lot of grooms don't care all that much about the wedding, and it tends to be the bride who gets carried away and sets the budget. So unless he has insisted on having x y and z and driven up the cost as a result, I actually think it's unfair to dictate what he spends his money on, and suggest that he shouldn't have a trip abroad, and should put the cash into the wedding fund instead.
If money is tight, or he has had a lot of input, then no, you're not being totally unreasonable. But I still think that banning him from going abroad is unfair. You can get two nights in places like the Costa del Sol/Costa Brava for around £80 all in: flights, accommodation, airport parking, and transfers. Add on around £80 a day for spending money (more than enough if they go off-peak), and you're talking £250; hardly breaking the bank. So, if money is tight, sit down and talk about what is a realistic budget. He is the groom, so unless his friends plan on paying for him (which by the way could be the case), he should be able to set the budget, and it's then up to his best man to find something within that.
CommentAuthor*KelBel*
He doesn't want to go anywhere like that,he wants Barcelona with a big champions league type football game... Tbh he picked the venue and caterer which has come in at £8500, and I wanted to spend half that so we're already having to save extra for that too ... I'm not banning him but I think why should I have a cheapo hen do to save money when he's spending like he's winning the lottery,honeymoon is gonna cost £4-5k,I think he just thinks money comes out of thin air...e have to think of any unexpected things that may come up in between too but not sure he's understanding my reasoning... I just think if I have to have mine here,then so should he,there's plenty of good things they could do here x
Velcro...my wedding day twinny! The Two Kel's!
Got engaged 14/10/12 in Central Park NYC!
Became Mrs Macdonald 13th September 2014
Mummy to 4 girlies and baby blue boy Due 10/05/2016
CommentAuthortorianixon
I'm so lucky ... I'm marrying a Billy no mates!! Ha!! You're not being unreasonable, if my other half wanted to go abroad I'd be upset... The only thing I can see him going abroad for as a stag do is a cycling event in some Spanish mountains, but he wants to do that anyway ...
Talk to him ... If he goes abroad then tell him he has to sacrifice something else....what is it he reeeeeeally wants at your wedding....?? Something that doesn't affect YOUR experience but will dampen his? For example no if ten people didn't go who we're solely his friend family, would that cover the cost? Give him hob sons choice, he can have it abroad but his bank cards stay at home, his friends foot the bill.... There's got to be a middle ground....
Engaged in December 2012
Getting married in September 2014
can't wait to be Mrs Whittlesea :-) bring on bridezilla!!
CommentAuthor*KelBel*
I could see his friends paying to go, but it's gonna cost about £500-600 in spending money for 5 days, I just can't justify that anywhere,when I know that if he just had a weekend two night break here he would only spend probs half that....
Velcro...my wedding day twinny! The Two Kel's!
Got engaged 14/10/12 in Central Park NYC!
Became Mrs Macdonald 13th September 2014
Mummy to 4 girlies and baby blue boy Due 10/05/2016
