Hellooo all :) Had a slight argument with my mum the other weekend, I want us to walk up the aisle in the following order: 1st flower girls then bridesmaid then maid of honour then me and my dad last
However she is adamant that we have to walk up in this order: 1st me and my dad then maid of honour then bridesmaid then flower girls
I am having just one bridesmaid (my cousin) and my sister is my maid of honour, we are having two flower girls, my H2Bs eldest nieces. I want to be the last one to walk up the aisle, so the girls walking before are sort of leading up to my entrance. However my mum says that the younger flower girls have to go last because otherwise they will cause a scene and not want to walk up the aisle first because it is too overwhelming for them (they are 4 and 6 years old), and also it is not the traditional British way to have the bride go last (didn't know there was 'British way' lol!). She really kicked off when I said I wanted to do it in my order, and basically scared me into agreeing to do it her way saying that the children will definitely have a tantrum and it will basically ruin the whole ceremony. I don't know what to do, I don't want the younger girls to cause a scene, but I also don't think they will. We are planning to have a ceremony run through the night before the wedding, so will this be enough to put them at ease? Anyone had any experiences I could learn from?
Thanks for all your help!
CommentAuthorWeeMintyMonkie
At my brothers wedding the order was MOH Bridesmaids Bride and FOB
Think i will have the same order or maybe Bridesmaids first then MOH xxx
CommentAuthorFlossie
Traditionally, the bride should be first up the aisle.......the order you want to go is more an American thing,but I think it's the way most brides choose to do it here as well now......after all the bride shoukd have the big entrance!!!! xx
CommentAuthorWeeMintyMonkie
Thats what i thought,
You spend all the time trying to hide your dress till last minute and its then seen before the bridesmaids if you go in before everyone else,
Although is there not a tradition of the bridesmaids holding the train?
xxx
CommentAuthorKat831
I'm having a lot of attendants and I agree that it sets the moment perfectly for them to proceed you down the aisle. My step son (10 then) will be with his Dad already at the alter, then I think it will be my 2 adult bridesmaids and my niece (9), then me and my son (who will be 4), then my twins (8) as they want to hold my train, and then my MoH. This may all change though but thats how I picture it!
Friends since 1999, together since 2007 :D
Mum to Twin girls and my little boy
Step mum to an amazing big boy
Flossie and WeeMintyMonkie thank you, that's what I thought, I don't want to have reached the end of the aisle, and everyone is still watching the bridesmaids and flower girls. I am not really having a train...it's sort of a puddle train, if anyone tried to hold it they would all see my ankles!
At the Royal wedding they had Pippa holding her train, but she had a huge train. Maybe having the bridesmaids and flower girls going after the bride is more traditional when brides used to have long trains, but I'm not having a train!
I think my mum is still upset because we're not having a church wedding - we've not been to church since I was 11 and we have to go to church to get me into a good school, but apparently now I'm going to get married she is the most religious person ever and we have really upset her by not getting married in a church! So she's trying to cling to as many of the perceived 'correct' traditions as possible because she's upset about the whole church thing. Ah life.
CommentAuthorRoxy
I will be having my party go before me so mum and I will be the last ones to walk down the aisle. If it's what you want hun just stick to your grounds.
CommentAuthorMadam Butterfly
Your day, Your way! x
You To Me Are Everything
The Sweetest Song That I Could Sing
Oh Baby
16th June 2012 x
CommentAuthormummyto2
we had it flowergirls then pageboys then teen bridesmaids adult bridemaids then me and my brother but its your day YOUR WAY
im a married women now
mrs carson-moores
i love my hubby and my kids with all my heart and soul
CommentAuthorSpreadsheetBride
Thanks ladies, I know about it being our day, our way, but it is just so hard telling family/mothers/friends/future father in laws that we are doing it this way, and not their way. You get the anger, the crying, the emotional blackmail, the scare mongering, seriously, how do you all deal with it?!
CommentAuthorkimmy
Im going last,but it's overwhelming for the fg whether they go first or last!
CommentAuthorKat
I think I have exactly the same argument coming my way. I want to go last as well. My mother has argued over everything to which I say it's our wedding not yours and if you're not happy you can always RSVP with a no. Keeps her quiet for around a month lol
CommentAuthorlollilou
We went ; flowergirl and pageboy, 2 bridesmaids, me and my Dad. Personally I preferred it this way as I got to make a grander entrance. xx
CommentAuthorkrazykitty
i want to do it the same as you, flower girls, bridesmaids and groomsman, maid of honour (i did want her walking down with best man but he already down there) me and dad!
it seems silly doing it me first because then im stood there waiting ages for everyone else to get in place! as long as my moh puts my dress in order first then i go down last!
might change as i get self conscious but still that the plan for now x
i cannot wait to marry my best friend
i love you ry!!!
engaged midnight 2009
Mrs Ryan Sheader (to be) lol :D
CommentAuthorFaye x
First time round i had the bridesmaids following me but going the other way round this time. Flowergirls and page boys first, then my bridesmaids then me, dad and my son cos they are both giving me away x x x x
CommentAuthorClareS
we're having a civil ceremony and i'm hoping that it'll be my son as pageboy my bm's moh then me and my mum.
I think things are much more relaxed with a civil ceremony. Sounds like the only person that would have a tantrum is your mum lol good luck x
CommentAuthorlinzi
I dont have much choice but to go up last. My train is that big the girls would have to step over it at the top of the aisle. I have 1 pageboy, 1 flower girl (actually have 2 but one is in a wheelchair and will already be at top of aisle) and 3 BMS. Just cant decide whether to put the 2 wee ones up themselves, then 2 BMS then MOH then me and Dad
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CommentAuthorAtaraxia
I'm having my BMs go up first. I quite like the American tradition of sending BMs coupled with a groomsman - we only have 2 groomsmen atm and I have 4 BMs, two of which have boyfriends that are DEFINITELY coming. So it's an idea!
Either way, I'm coming down last! I don't have a train or anything, and I just think it's logical to have the bride coming down last, so the BMs are out of the way! Can't get the party started without the bride, so she should be the last to arrive in my opinion :P
Got married 27th June and blessed on July 5th 2012
Finally Mrs M :3
Love, love... Here we are.
CommentAuthorHunny Bunny
We're having the pageboys up first, the brisedmaids and the moh. Then me! My best friend is waslking me down the isle because I dont have a father to give me away, and half way down we stop, music stops and my h2b walks up to me, we both walk the rest of the way together. Unusual, but it works for us x I generally feel that it's however you feel comfortable x
Met Dec 04~Engaged Feb 05~Finally getting married 3rd Sept
Start Weight ~ 08.03.11 *198lbs* Current weight 181lbs
lost 1st 4lbs !!!!
CommentAuthorbride to b
I am still trying to decide what order I want and I only have 4 weeks today to go. I have 1x pageboy aged 81xflowergirl aged 8 1x bridesmaid aged 13 c bridesmaid aged 18.
CommentAuthorSpreadsheetBride
Thinking about it I should have entitled this discussion 'How to stop your mother blackmailing/frightening/guilt-tripping you into doing what SHE wants for YOUR wedding!' !!!!!! I guess I already know what order I want for the procession, just how to convince the mother. I'm going to tell her loads of people do it the way I want these days, maybe that way it won't seem so 'unusual and untraditional' to her. Aargh.
CommentAuthormartay (marie)
if your in doubt about the FGs being overwhelmed why dont you have each of the older girls walk with a FG and enter first, then you follow with your dad! that way you can have it YOUR way.
As i am only having 1 FG and 1BM i am going to get them to walk in first, as i feel putting them at the back wont work with it only being the 2 and it will be a kind of an anti climax. not only that it will help me with nerves because i know some people will be looking at my daughter (FG) also, so that kind of lifts the pressure from me.
all ive got to give to you are these 5 words tonight
Thank you for loving me, for being my eyes when i couldnt
see. for parting my lips when i couldnt breathe
thank you for loving me xxx
CommentAuthorSteffie
I'm having the Flowergirls (potentially with the Page Boys if we decide that Noah and Roux Noah will be 2 and 3 months and Roux will be 22months)
Then Cousin Bridesmaid
Then Maid of Honour No 2 (Cherrie)
Than Maid of Honour No 1 (Janine)
Then Me and Daddy!!!
I want the suspense to be held for as long as possible!!!
CommentAuthorWeeMintyMonkie
KrazyKitty I like your idea of the bridesmaids going down with the groomsman, I didnt think of that. My bros groomsman were there with him and the best man, it was only the bridesmaids and the bride and FOB that walked down the aisle at his wedding!
Xxx
CommentAuthorSteffie
ooooh that is a fab idea KrazyKitty and WeeMintyMonkie
I'd keep Best Man up with Ant and then have Dippy Dave, My brother and Ant's Brother walk my girlies down the aisle!! Perfection xxxx
CommentAuthorWeeMintyMonkie
My brother is a groomsman and his wife is a bridesmaid. I would have them walking each other down the aisle and my cousin with the other grooms man! Xxx
CommentAuthorFutureMrsClarke
It seems to be a real 'across the pond' distinction! From the age of 3 to 13 I was living in america and the two weddings I went to there, the bride came down the aisle last. When we moved back home and I was a bridesmaid for my cousin I was really weirded out by the fact that we came out after she did! I think that everyone else should go out first and the best, ie the bride (;D), is saved for last!
CommentAuthorLaticschick Holland
i'm having flowergirl me and dad 2 adult bridesmaids
CommentAuthorclewsy
chief and then bridesmaid then together flower girl and paige boy together then mex
CommentAuthorKatiePx
edited
I'm having ;
- Flowergirl & Pageboy - 6 Bridesmaids ( In pairs ) Then me and my mum :)
I think it's all down to personal preference to be honest but at the end of the day you should respect your mum wishes
x
EDIT I've actually just realised this says to repect your mums wishes, it's meant to say for YOUR MUM to respect YOUR WISHES! lol sorry x
CommentAuthornicole85
im having -
flowergirl & pageboy 2 bms me & my mum
I want it to lead up to my big enterance
x
Goin 2 b Mrs Pounder on 4th Aug 2012
CommentAuthorOfficially Mrs Nicol
we will be flower girls and page boys, bridesmaid maid of honour then dad and me.. :) So far thats the way i would like it.. :)
CommentAuthormrs pinkalice
im having 1 bridesmaid & flowergirl 1 bridemaids & pageboy maid of honour me & my dad
we have to walk down stairs in to the ceremony room (see my pictures - eek its steep!) and didnt want the little ones to fall so that's why they're going with the bridesmaids. I want to walk in last to make more of an entrance, and I think if the bride goes first then no one really looks at the bridesmaids and I want them to have their moment too x
CommentAuthorClareS
Just don't tell your mum lol. She'll be sat at the front waiting for you all to arrive. Then once she's there you tell who you want to go first. She wont be able to say anything by that point lol x
CommentAuthortweedwedding
I'm having my BM's walk down first, the room we're getting married in is quite small so I don't think that there will be room for them to walk behind me and then sit down on the first row of seats! Plus the piece of music I want to walk into isn't really suitable for them to walk into - I want Harry Connick Jr 'It had to be you'!! - really want to find an acoustic version of 'here come the girls' for the BM's to walk into!
Having the BM's go in first is the 'American' way but I don't think it really matters which way round you do it. I'm also having my BM's go first because I do want the big entrance! I don't think the girls will cause a scene though and it's your day...should be your way.... xx
CommentAuthortweedwedding
ClareE - Very good idea!!!
CommentAuthorjo Santa
My cousin had your preferred order when she married last year - it was lovely as there was a real suspense waiting for her. They all kissed the groom on the cheek before they sat down too which was a nice touch as they were all family.
Jo Santa
CommentAuthortweedwedding
Oh that sounds lovely Jo Santa :-) nice touch :-) x
CommentAuthorKerrylmac
I have 4 bms, 2 fgs & 2 pageboys and i want them all to walk up before me. In an ideal world i'd like the fgs to each hold hands with the pageboys but i know kids and this is unlikely to happen so i think each of the bms will walk up holding hands with one of the little ones.
At h2bs brothers wedding in May they had our daughters as flowergirls and they walked up the aisle first followed by bride followed by bms. our daughters were aged 3 and 18 mths at the time and they may have been a little phased when they walked into church and saw all the people watching but then they saw Daddy (as he was best man) standing at end of the aisle and they just ran down into his arms - i imagine they will do the same at our wedding (ours in civil though)
hadn't thought abuot the train problem though, ine is bigger than i thought i would have but i suppose one of my b,ms could just sort it out once i get there.
x
CommentAuthorcolliwoggle
I haven't decided yet, but I think that the MOH is supposed to go closest to the Bride (out of all the bridesmaids)..
CommentAuthorchubblywubbly
im going down last..my 6yr old is flower girl and 2yrold is page boy so i want them walking down 1st holding hands. i know every1 will be paying them more attention..but thats what i want hehe!! then my two older bridesmaids, then me and my dad! :)
like everyones saying....YOUR DAY...YOUR CHOICE! :) xx
CommentAuthorNicsquared
Im going to buck the trend - Im going first, I quite like the traditional way :) It may be the one thing me and my mum agree on
There are so many people out there who will tell you
what you can't do.
What you have to do is turn around and say, "watch me"!!
CommentAuthorOfficially Mrs M
I'm having 2 flower Girls holding hands and then bm then moh and then me and dad :-)
8th September 2012 I married my best friend
1st September 2014 our little family grew by one
Women are made to be loved, not understood. - Oscar Wilde
CommentAuthorKayteeG
My sister (MOH) will walk down with our daughter (FG), then me and my dad will walk afterwards. Not having bridesmaids as such x
CommentAuthorAbbey
Are your flower girls allowed to scatter petals in the church SpreadsheetBride? If they have a purpose they shouldn't be scared. My flowergirls are doing that but I have put the older flowergirl, my niece in charge of looking after my 3yr old god daughter and they are both very confident, independant children, so I know they will be fine. They will probably be going first and may also go with the 1 yr old page boy too. My MoH is the fg and pb's mum so she will go next then me and my brother. I definitely want to be the one making the entrance. I didn't spend money on a gorgeous dress to be ignored in the procession ;o) Good luck with your Mum,I'd be inclined to tell her you agree with her then on the day switch the order to what you want. It is definitely your day hun andI don't see why you should regret doing something you wanted on your wedding day x
CommentAuthorMel D
It's definitely a British thing having bridesmaids behind (also the "Maid Of Honor" is very American). Also I guess it depends on your dress. I had this argument with one of my bridesmaids when I told her I was walking in last she said "But who will sort out your train!?!" I didn't have a train. So I had
2 x Bridesmaids Maid Of Honor me & godfather
Got married Sat 28/05/2011
Renewing vows Sat 29/05/2021
We're planning WELL in advance!!
CommentAuthorVicky
I still dont know what you do... I am a bit confused by it all TBH.. H2b family are really traditional but I think I prefer the American way.. I think once we have heard our rehersla I will know more..
CommentAuthorGuessWho
I went to one on Saturday and it was
Flowergirl and Paigeboy Bridesmaids MOH Bride & FOB
I'm going to have
Youngest flower girl and Paigeboy My daughter (7) and older paige boy 5 bridesmaids walked down by Ushers MOH Me
Engaged 20th May 2011 - Times Square, New York
Wedding 18th May 2013 - South of France
CommentAuthorsam73
I am having tallest bridesmaid followed by my brother and his sister together then his othe usher along with my bm and finally MOH then me and my dad
CommentAuthorbridalmiss
Yeah, I'm doing it the american way too, flowergirls first, then bridesmaid, then me and my mum who's giving me away - like you say, hold the suspense a while longer! Plus if the bride goes before the bridal party, the groom won't have a clue how they look as his eyes will be on the bride!
