we have just received a very very generous cheque from some good friends of H2B's parents. I have never even met them!
the cheque is for more than H2B's parents are even contribting to the wedding!
we really dont feel right accepting a gift of that much, it just feels too much if you know what i mean. What to do? they are quite well off and have only 1 son, who is also very well off.
do we accept it gratefully or tell them thank you SO much but we couldnt possibly accept that much? i am worried about offending them?
its £300 and H2B really isnt happy accepting it.
I don’t repeat gossip so listen very carefully!!
Started Slimming World - 23/03/2011 - 2 Stone to lose!
Total Loss = 1 stone 7 lbs.
As at 23/11 - 3 days before the wedding.
CommentAuthorWifey2be
i think its a lovely gift and they have given it to you because they can afford it!
would they been offened if you gave it back ? xx
CommentAuthorlinzi
well i think anyone would be offended if you gave their gift back? that is what is worrying me.
I don’t repeat gossip so listen very carefully!!
Started Slimming World - 23/03/2011 - 2 Stone to lose!
Total Loss = 1 stone 7 lbs.
As at 23/11 - 3 days before the wedding.
CommentAuthorMrs Brakes
They will be offended if you don't accept it. You didn't ask them for the money, they have given it as a gift to wish you well. Take it in the spirit it is given. If you need to, get them something nice to say thank you.
Got married 11/11/11.
CommentAuthorLaura4Alex
To be honest weddings are expensive and i would keep it! put it towards something special like your rings or dress? I would say a big thank you to them though and maybe some flowers delivered. My h2b parents are contributing a 1,000 and buying my toara and veil plus they have a shoe box that they put their spare silver coins in! My parents are paying for most of it we have paid for our honeymoon x
It's a compliment - they obviously think very highly of h2b. Chances are they wont accept it back anyway, I understand why he's so uncomfortable with it, maybe he could call them? What have the inlaws said? x
29th September 2012
Cant wait to be Mrs D!
CommentAuthorJill
Thinking about it are they going to the wedding? If they are they'll probably try to give it again at the wedding if you dont accept it now, before always comes in handy x
29th September 2012
Cant wait to be Mrs D!
CommentAuthorlinzi
we dont want to mention it to the inlaws, just in case their friends would be annoyed that we are discussing the gift? and also his parents might feel bad that friends of theirs are giving us the same amount of money as they are!
I am torn. I obviously want to accept it, but it really does feel like far too much.
I don’t repeat gossip so listen very carefully!!
Started Slimming World - 23/03/2011 - 2 Stone to lose!
Total Loss = 1 stone 7 lbs.
As at 23/11 - 3 days before the wedding.
CommentAuthorMrsKisywisy
i think they had a reason to give you both it. it's a lovely gesture :)
i would accept it and then buy them a lovely present after the wedding
I'M MARRIED!!!
I am now Mrs Bananaman!!!!
13/09/2012 in Peyia Town Hall, Cyprus
CommentAuthorJill
Speak to the couple then. They can obviously afford it, thank them, say it's too much where they'll probably correct you and say its fine then jobs done x
29th September 2012
Cant wait to be Mrs D!
CommentAuthorlinzi
gawd how is money such an icky thing to talk about.
I don’t repeat gossip so listen very carefully!!
Started Slimming World - 23/03/2011 - 2 Stone to lose!
Total Loss = 1 stone 7 lbs.
As at 23/11 - 3 days before the wedding.
CommentAuthorJill
It's a really British thing isnt it, taboo! It's up there with hardcore porn lol x
29th September 2012
Cant wait to be Mrs D!
CommentAuthorJill
ooops - I knew as soon as I posted that word that rhymed with corn that I'd be starred out lol x
29th September 2012
Cant wait to be Mrs D!
CommentAuthorbridalmiss
I'd accept it, and send a thank you card to them (hand written, not typed) saying how thankful you are and glad you will be to meet them at the wedding etc.
CommentAuthormunchkinpie
At my first wedding some good family friends sent us a large cheque - way more than we could accept or felt worthy off. I spoke to them and said it was too much and we were just glad they could spend the day and if they were really adament they could buy me a new microwave (less than they were giving!) They accepted because in fairness im a stubborn moo. We got a lovely new microwave and low and behold an envelope from an anonymous donor with £200 on the day which i know was them.
Also we couldnt afford (and I didnt want) a honeymoon but when my ex's already ex-boss found out he booked us a 4 day holiday all paid for and £200 spending money.
People really are sometimes touched to be included in other peoples celebrations and just remember that a few hundred pund is nothing to some people.
All I can say is if it was me Id accept (if i knew they could afford it) but make sure they received a special personalised thank you and show how much it helped and what it made possible in making your day better or its gone towards house etc
xxxx
Working on a 3 dream plan for the next 5 years!
Dream 1 = My gorgeous Mr P proposed - 4/9/11 Sydney Harbour
Dream 2 = Getting Married Easter 2012 by Bonnie Loch Lomond
Dream 3 = Working on that dream life in Australia
CommentAuthorlinzi
lol @ Jill.
I think we are gonna say to them at the wedding something like "thank you so much for your very generous gift, it really was too much! but its enabled us to:
either 1 - buy a new washing machine cause ours is ancient 2 - have a really romantic desert island experience whilst on honeymoon which we couldnt have afforded to do before.
just trying to decide which would be best!
I don’t repeat gossip so listen very carefully!!
Started Slimming World - 23/03/2011 - 2 Stone to lose!
Total Loss = 1 stone 7 lbs.
As at 23/11 - 3 days before the wedding.
CommentAuthorlinzi
thanks girls for your advice as always!
I'll pick up a thank you card tomorrow and get it posted out to them.
I don’t repeat gossip so listen very carefully!!
Started Slimming World - 23/03/2011 - 2 Stone to lose!
Total Loss = 1 stone 7 lbs.
As at 23/11 - 3 days before the wedding.
CommentAuthorStevie_Dee
Glad you are graciously accepting hun, nothing worse than being given a gift back. For what ever reason it can be seen as putting their nose out of joint when they have quite obviously thought about it and wanted to help in some way. I would go with the desert island getaway as it will feel to them that they have given you a once in a lifetime experience. xxx
I have a gorgeous husband!
2 brilliant wonderful boys, a wonderful life
in Cornwall. Happiest woman ever!
Now making our house a home. Blessing 2014.
CommentAuthorlala "mod" bunni
i would have said accept it in the spirit in which it was given
yeah i think your doing right and the desert island getaway sounds amazing :) x x
CommentAuthorShirleygirly
I would of done what you are doing, people like to hear what you are doing with their money. My parents gave us a cheque for £250 as an engagement present and refused to take it back, they suggested we put it towards our engagement party or a pre wedding holiday. They are also contributing to our wedding and when I asked them what they would like to pay for they said they would contribute a 5 figure sum, anything extra would be up to us anything left over we can put towards our house deposit. On the one hand I'm hugely grateful that I have the most amazing parents ever but on the other hand I hate the fact that they have worked damn hard their entire lives and now they will be dipping into their savings just for one day of my life. H2b is really unhappy about it as his Mum is a lonely pensioner and won't be paying anything.
If only we could all do it for free, there wouldn't be all these complicated money issues. x
I can't wait until 29/06/2013
The day I marry the man of my dreams!
