Ok so I'm in a massive dilemma with my hen do, whoever invented the hen do should be shot!!!!!

So there are potentially 14 people going to my hen do but how hard is it to try and find something that doesn't involve nightclubbing/strippers etc etc.

I've asked everyone for there available dates in July and I've had the majority back but some people just won't reply back to me even though I know they have seen the message (did a group message on book of face & emailed). So I know I can't do it the first weekend of July because certain people aren't available. So the dates are the last 3 weeks of July which is fine by me.

Now what to do for my hen do is the major problem bless my step MIL2B she's been really patient and helpful with finding stuff we can do we were messaging all night on book of face trying to find things.

The first problem that came to me was people wanting to do 1 night instead of 2 nights I got mixed responses or no responses and then people were moaning because of commitments etc, so I ignored the 1 or 2 night answers from people and my step MIL2B had made 3 suggestions which was:

London Theatre Weekend - 2 nights
Birmingham Comedy club Weekend - 1 night
Seaside Resort With Entertainment - 2 nights

So I forwarded these options to everyone and again they all moaned because of the 2 nights thing, and I thought well there's no point going to London or the seaside resort for 1 night it would be a waste of time because it would be a massive rush and there would be no site seeing things etc so it ended up being a no no, and the comedy night was looking like the best option but it wasn't really shouting out at me with excitement (probably because I was and am getting stressed and annoyed about it all). My mum isn't being the best at helping out either because she hates being thrown out of her routine and likes to do things at certain times etc she can't be spontaneous at all which I can't really blame her for but all she wants to do is maybe go out for a meal and thats it. Which yea is ok but it's not going to be very exciting for everyone else. So I asked her on the phone yesterday what she would like to do out the 3 even though I know what her answer would be and she said we all need to do the Birmingham one because then we can go home after if no one wants to stay over etc. I jst listened to be honest and didn't really acknowledge it, the thing is I know she'll just sit there with my auntie trying to nit pick at things and expect me to sit by her all night when there's 14 people altogether.

Anyway the Birmingham thing didn't really do it for me in the end, and so then my step MIL2B started looking online again and found a murder mystery weekend thing and sent me a couple of links and we found one that would be brilliant in Stratford, there were actors that did everything (thank god because I don't like playing characters) but we had to sort of find out ourselves who did it, it was all held in the really nice hotel and the package include 2 nights stay and the meal & breakfast etc I really liked this option because evryone would be together and would have to sort of bond, so I forwarded this to everyone and people weren't keen on the price but I don't think they thought about the fact that the price included evrything and we would be spending this amount if it was going to be the Birmingham one etc.

So I was getting really stressed out so I left it last night and went to bed.

So I get up today and head to work and I go straight online (I don't think I did any work today trying to sort the hen thing out) and go onto these companies that do the packages, so I'm looking through and find ones where you get the day activities and then the evening for food and entertainment etc, so I started forwarding a few options and no one really got back to me, so I thought right stuff this I'm going to do what I fancy and it's tough boobies if people don't want to join, I'm fed up of trying to please everyone and I just can't do it.

So I've gone for a place in Bristol or a place in Cheltenham where you do daily activities like dressing up in inflatable things etc like it's a knockout stuff, and then in the evening there's a 2 or 3 course meal and then a comedy night followed by an after show party thing. So I'm quite happy for this, so I've emailed the 2 companies and asked them for a quote and availability for July and then I'm going to let people know what I have decided to do and not give them any more options apart from do they want to go or not and that's it.

The hen do has been the most difficult decision making and organising out of the whole wedding!!!!

I've just realised this is pretty long so I'll stop typing now.

This is your hen do not theirs! you should be able to do exactly what you want to do. Unfortunately You tend to find people will make excuses no matter how amazing it is. But most important thing is you have a great time and remember it for being fun for you. Sometimes you find that only having a handful of your closest family and friends turns out to be better than loads of people just not making an effort to enjoy them self. I hope all the important people accept your invitation and hope you have a fantastic hen do anyway x

Thanks guys, it's given me right headache trying to sort it out.

Hoping it all gets sorted from here, but as I said before it's tough if people don't like it, and it's there own fault if they aren't going to make the effort to try and enjoy it. I've got fed up of trying to please everyone so I put my foot down and thought s0d them all I'll do what I want to do.

Fingers crossed the company get back to me with the dates available!!

Yea I was considering not doing a hen do and just going on H2Bs stag do I'd enjoy it much more, his is going to be so much easier to sort than mine is.

Or I was thinking of not having a hen do at all and hoping people would forget lol, I'd be quite happy staying at home drinking tea and watching a film and people could just go out in my honour!

Haha, it's good to rant every now and again let off some steam!!

Thanks.

Yea I've been working on the hen do again today, and again it's taken over my work so I really need to do some tomorrow!!!

I'm getting there now I've sent them all the basic details of costs, what's happening on the day etc and all I've asked for is a yes or no to coming.

Awww poor you!!!! Although at least you had a better outcome when you told everyone the details and just asked for a yes or no. Hopefully the same will apply for whatever else you come up with next! Good luck, i've got to say; i don't envy you at all :-/ x

I was really looking forward to the day time activity as well.

Got an email back from the hen do company and they confirmed that under 18s are not allowed on any of there packages!! Damn!!

Well I have sent the group a message on book of face and have got one more last option which is posh camping which is knwn as glamping but you get to do some bushtucker activities in the day followed by refreshments and then you get evening entertainment it's in one of them big teepee type things but has got all mod cons etc, and it's not too far away for people to get to by car.

It's my one and only option I can think of after this if this is a no go then I'm done officially going on strike!!

I have been looking at hen dos and its driving me mad. I was considering murder mystery but my two cousins are coming over from aus and they are my bridesmaids but they have 4 kids between them so an overnight thing is not an option.

It's really hard!

Ok so quick update.

I think I may have found something that isn't over £120, can allow under 18s and can be either a no night, 1 night or 2 night stay.

Murder Mystery - It's my last thing me and step MIL2B can think of otherwise we have said we are packing up and going away for a very long time lol.

Most people have said yes to it, my mum didn't sound very enthusiastic about it because it involves staying away, but also i think she was hoping for me to say I give up and we're all staying in Worcester and going bowling and then for a few drinks (not that there is anything wrong with that) but I wanted to do something different. The murder mystery wasn't as different as I wanted but if I had don what I had really wanted then there would have only been very few of us!

I mean we're going to do the 1 night stay and people can either go home or come with me and step MIL2B and go to do some sight seeing or something.

I do have an awful feeling that this is also going to fail, so as I said before I'll just pack up and leave for a while lol and go into hiding.

Ah that sounds good Jenny!! dont think negative, you have found something that will accomodate most peoples needs and that is all that matters! I did see that when i was looking! And i had same thoughts, last thing i could think of else im boycotting it completely!! Im sure you will be fine. the fact most people are up for it, just go ahead and book it! least ur getting answers!!!

I am gutted I cant do a 2nighter but am still tempted with the idea i've got, i made a fb group and STILL noone replying me!! got a 4 or 5 'yes's' before I did the group but so far thats it!! AND my FSIL may not be able to afford anything after all!! Just feel like getting messed around. but giving it another few days then going to get on their case to secure numbers and book it.
I am also tempted to go night before and have a night with my best mate in the hotel, so we still have the 2 nighter we were planning originally!!

Fluffy that sounds fab :)
xx

I'll come. I love murder mystery nights. Xxx

Yay Karen!!!

I know lula I've stopped caring now about the hen do, who ever doesn't say if they can come or not I just won't put them down in the numbers for the hen do. I've got 10 out of 14 people that can come the other 4 just haven't replied I've sent them a message saying they have until the end of the week and then I need to book it up, hopefully that will prompt them to get there finger out lol.

I am fed up of trying to please everyone, I know on the wedding day people are going to moan about something.

I thought my hen do was stressful, I've left it all to my cbm who has organised a weekend in Bristol. All I know is its 12th April, we've booked a house that accommodates 20 and there is a Dolly Parton theme for the Saturday night. I've been getting stress because despite people being told not to tell me anything I keep getting messages from people telling me they can't make the whole weekend or they're not coming so I'm panicking that the messages aren't going to the right places and the costings have been worked out properly. One of my friends has told me not to worry because its all organised and taken care of but there is a big part of me that wishes I'd just opted for a quiet night in. I hope you get it all sorted, as if planning a wedding wasn't stressful enough.

Would love to try murder mystery, I will come lol x x

Don't think I'm having a hen night the way it's going, sadly my friends can be so unreliable at times x x

ive put another msg out for my lot to reply. 3 out 14 have. and 2 already had told me in advance!
so will msg people privately on monday and if no response then sod it! actually have had enough! x

That we should!
I don't care anymore. I really dont! haha x

Yay! Finally!! Well done you :-) x

aw thats fab news! well done you!

No more updates on mine... getting SILLY now! xx

My bridesmaid is only 17 so the organising has been done by her mum, (my Step MIL2B). But I've had to help with it all as well.

Just hoping everyone pays me there deposits since I've paid and booked for them.

Then me & bridesmaid ( my best bud) is doing a spa day the next day which I'm really looking forward 2 it.... I would of like 2 of gone away but mainly all my friends have kids so there for not much money, but am very happy doing this!!! :0)