Ok so I am not inviting children to the wedding itself, anyone know how I should put this in my invites? Everything I come up with sounds so rude ~ Any help would be greatly appreciated ladies x x x
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CommentAuthorMrs (Dove) Pidgeon
Don't mention them on the actual invite, then in the other info just say that you are unable to accomodate children.
Now a extremely happy German housewife and now a Mother!!!!
Islay Jean born 24th June in Hannover.
CommentAuthorPossum
I think the same as Dove. I wouldn't take kids to a wedding if the invite said "Rosi + partner" or "Rosi + Callum"
CommentAuthorSuzi
Hmmmm see now I agree but I just no someone is going to ask.. I was thinking about putting at the bottom of the invite
Please note this is an Adult Only Wedding
What do you think????
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CommentAuthorspooney24
I think putting no children invited or adults only would be wrong but instead just put the adults names on the invites and surely then it would hint that their kids arent invited. Cant think of any other way at the moment unless you inform those that have kids beforehand so that they know before the invites arrive. x
26th December 2007 - the day I met my special man
8th August 2008 - the day he was mad enough to propose to me
24th July 2010 - the day I felt beautiful inside and out and
became Mrs Dickie for life. xx
wev just put the adults names on ours although we have 2 sets of friends who are bringing their children but they are close to our children and are leaving at 9pm so the adults can relax
CommentAuthorMrs Turps (Nicpep)
i just said - sorry, due to limited numbers only children that are part of the bridal party are invited - or somehting like that :P
18-09-10
Now a married lady :)
Im a rebel me
CommentAuthorCupCake
Yeah I'd just put the adults on the invite. That makes it clear the children are not invited. Most parents appreciate a day out without the kids so don't worry too much xx
Became Mrs Lyons 30th July 2011 x
CommentAuthorPossum
I think it would be very rude of people to just bring their kids without asking!!
CommentAuthorMrs Turps (Nicpep)
lol i have a friend that I know is going to refuse to come to the wedding simply because its no kids. She is obsessed and wont come without them, she cant spend the day without them :(
18-09-10
Now a married lady :)
Im a rebel me
CommentAuthorPossum
Her loss nicpep!
CommentAuthorSuzi
Nicpep I have the same problem grrrr! Thanks for your advice ladies! x x
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CommentAuthorCupCake
Whats wrong with these people?? I love having a relaxing day without my kids xx
Became Mrs Lyons 30th July 2011 x
CommentAuthorx~Hails~x
edited
Ive only invited 7 kids and there my 3 kids, my 3 nieces and h2b's nephew. But thats to the meal. The rest have grown up children but not inviting them either lol. I have a really large family so at least half are not coming if i did i'd have over 200 ppl without friends :-( at the mo ive got 50 for the wedding with an extra 40-50 for the reception including lots of children.
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CommentAuthorSuzi
Cupcake I couldn't agree more, if it was me I would enjoy the peace and quiet and not have to worry about having too much to drink x
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CommentAuthorsbride
I wouldn't take my children to a wedding unless I had to! Im going to 2 weddings in july, my 2 year old is flower girl for both so obviously I have to take her, but I wont be taking my baby. I enjoy the break away, however I am inviting children to my wedding. But I think its just enough to not put the childrens names on the invite. If i got an invite without my childrens names on, I would take it that they are not invited and I wouldnt be offended.
I am now Mrs Stacey Stiles and loving it!
CommentAuthorskitty666
im goin to have children at mine but theres only my 2 they will be 2 and 3 and my mates 2 who will be 5 and 6 and h2b 5 nieces and nephews 7,8,9,11,16 so they are at the age were they will behave but are goin to say to parents to sit where they can just get up and leave if they do start playing up and then all kids will be leaving at 8 so we can relax without them.
CommentAuthorKaz133
I only have 4 coming,and two are mine! I think i would say the same as someone mentioned..we regret we are unable to accomodate children.x
CommentAuthorKelley
I would go with the unable to accomadate children thing and if anyone causes a huge fuss just smooth it over by apologising but end of the day its your wedding day i wouldnt be offended if i couldnt bring my daughter. If people really causes a fuss thats there problem stick to your plan otherwise you end up changing. oh and dont do what my uncle did and say no kids, even his grandaughter wasnt there but the brides nieces and nephews were there, that just annoys people.
CommentAuthorJay
i agree with the others, just put the adults names on the invite, if you think the parents are going to kick up a fuss then maybe phone them first to make sure they understand that it is them that are invited only and not the kids. Our weddings the opposite weve got about 20 kids coming, kinda hoping some people will leave the kids behind though x
CommentAuthorL JO
We have been invited to a wedding in June thats Adults only and they put on the invitations 'we are very sorry but regret we cant accomadate children' ...I'm ok with it as I'm looking foward to a childfree day but my brother and sister and my cousin are all refusing to go because its NO children xx
CommentAuthorPinkberry
I think its disgusting refusing to go to a wedding because the invite does not include children. Its not normally done to be mean but to keep the numbers down due to cost.
CommentAuthorPossum
You think that's bad, my h2b's ex's parents wouldn't go to their best friends' wedding because they saw marriage as conforming to the social norm! Slightly pathetic for adults if you ask me.
CommentAuthorFordie
Call me thick but I wouldn't automatically assume that kids couldn't go to a wedding if the invite was only addressed in the guest and their partner's name !! :os Maybe confirming on the invite that kids are not invited is a good way to ensure the 'PrincessTweetz's of the world are aware of this lol!! :) A small 'adult's only please' in the corner of the invite would probably do the trick x
CommentAuthorjenniebean
why are you not having kids at the wedding ? i suppose we have kids ourselves so wouldnt even think of not inviting children we are also hiring a nanny for the evening to keep the children in check and entertained lol
CommentAuthorlala "mod" bunni
i am also not having anychildren to my wedding apart from immediate family ( which actally means h2b`s neieces and nephew) I dont want children running around and sliding over the dance floor and to be honest if family ( h2b`s cousins )wont come because they cant bring the kids then quite frankly they will be saving me money !!!!!!
Jennie we just don't want to have loads of screaming kids running around the place, just not my cup of tea! In my opinion if I was handed an invitation to a birthday party and it had just my name on I wouldn't take the kids so why should I take them to a wedding if their names are not on the invite? Arghhhh blimmin wedding etiquette lol
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CommentAuthorDan and Lisa :o)
We arent able to accomodate too many children so we have spoken to ppl invited ad said we are having to limit it to immediate family only. Other than that I dont know how to help. We have 50 kids that r family only so anymore would b a nitemare.lol Just talk or email those invited and explain the situation!
CommentAuthorClaire Sky
we are having the same no children, just closest family children so there will only 4! 2 Godchildren and 2 niece's! Not a fan of kids... sorry! x i have done a seperate piece of card to go in the invite's which says
"Unfortunately as most of our friends and family have children, we can not invite all of them! We are only including immediate Family children/Godchildren. Sorry if this an inconvenience for you. Look forward too seeing you on the 12th November'
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CommentAuthorDrunchPunk
Well my wedding is so far away it's not easy to say how many children are likely to be knocking around! But currently I can only think of two that might come. So I'm not going to say 'no children' if there's only 2 likely to come.
But what I think I am going to say is that there won't be a lot to entertain children, and the venue has a lot of breakable antiques, so if possible, could kids be left with other family members for the night? There aren't any children in my family, and only one in my H2B's (his cousin's son) so I don't plan on specifically planning stuff for kids at my wedding, so I think they'll just be bored anyway!
CommentAuthorHoxxyhula
I don't think we will have many children, purely because we don't have the space in our venue. We are speaking to parents individually to establish whether they will be able to come if the kids can't, so there will be a few exceptions. I am not sure that people would assume kids were not invited unless it says so on the invite.
CommentAuthornewmrshartley
best to have only adults on the invite and then maybe pop in a hand written note to those people with families explaining you are having an adult only wedding as the venue dictates this, but that they are welcome to join in festivities at the later reception. Most people wont bother going home after the wedding to pick up their kids and bring them back. Anyone who has issues can always just come to the later celebrations. and if you make it sound like the venue is the reason, you can offer them your sympathy, but not comprpmise as . . . you CANT let children come to the wedding! Lol! a bit deceptive, but its only a little white lie and will save any arguments! I have the same problem, my niece is going to be a flower girl, which means i have to invite my cousin (who is a month older) and my brother's other child due to be born in August this year :) Trying to draw the line at my sister's boyfriend's 3 sons, but dont know if i can? Just think £35 is a lot to pay for children who dont even know my partner's name!
CommentAuthornewmrshartley
if you feel uberguilty and your budget will stretch, arrange for a babysitter service to look after any children and bring them to the later reception. but they have 4 montsh to find their own babysitter so i wouldnt worry :)
CommentAuthornat123
hi guys xx im really pissed off about this !!!! my invites had no mention off kids , i just put the adults names. me an my OH decided a long time ago that we wanted NO kids...which we thought as no kids name on ivites they would know that there was no kids/babies... we got a call from MIL today saying her brother is really pissed off as he wants his daughter and her OH to be able to bring their 5 month old baby... my MIL told him that that was what we wanted and it was our wedding!! he said that they prob wont come now... even though i've had their rsvp back saying they was.... i soooo pissed of i just think "well F**K you then dont bother if thats how you feel xxx
make sure somwhere you put down that there is NO KIDS LOL xxx
CommentAuthorDrunchPunk
The one thing I would add to what I said above is that I would always make an exception for breastfeeding mothers - they can't be away from their child for that long a time... but any kid who's breastfeeding isn't likely to break stuff and skid on the dancefloor anyway :)
CommentAuthornewmrshartley
poor you Nat! chances are he is just throwing his toys and will sort himself out before the day. at least your MIL agreed that it was what you wanted and stood firm as well :) mine would probably have a go at me as well! ha! luckily my h2b only have 8 people in his entire family and the youngest is 15 and will be a bridesmaid :) its my family which is huge and causing issues :)
CommentAuthorgemzy24
Well i agree with just putting adults names on invites we went to a friends wedding reception last yr and our invite only had our names on so i made a call just to check that it was no kids first and they confirmed this so we got a sitter so people should be able to realise that they not invited if there names are not on the invite x
CommentAuthornewmrshartley
and milk for breastfeeding babes can be expressed so they can be looked after by a friend or relative who isnt going to the wedding! :) i looked after my niece all the time when she was a diddy babe!
CommentAuthorHoxxyhula
Also teeny babies who are breastfeeding will be free at most venues!!
CommentAuthorKizzy81
It's actually traditional NOT to have children, other than breastfeeding, at a wedding. My very posh boss's daughter is getting married this saturday in an incredibly traditional ceremony and they're having just that.
And don't feel bad. It's so easy to forget that YOU'RE paying for their day, food, wine - a wedding is a free day out when it's not yours. Don't let them make you feel guilty!!!
CommentAuthorTinsel
edited
We have decided no children except the flower girl, but we are even thinking about not having her. I hate those kids that run around like they own the place, take up the dance floor, get under everyone's feet, don't get told off by their parents (as they are too drunk to notice) and generally make a nuisance of themselves. Plus I am a teacher and have quite enough of children at school thank you.
You have what you want on your day and I will be saying something like what everyone else has said (unfortunately, children cannot be accommodated), but not 'adults only' as that sounds naughty to me lol! :o)
07.04.12 - the best day of my life!
Living happily ever after as Mrs Nottage x
CommentAuthorSuzi
Thanks everyone for your responses, it seems I am not the only one with this issue! This is the 2nd time round for me and I didn't have any children at my first except my 11 month old son, not even my nephew who was only 5 months! I just cant be doing with it! Tinsel you painted the picture perfectly! Ive got a live band and a DJ and just cant see the kids getting on down to the likes of Guns and Roses and Kings of Leon, well not all of them anyway lmao! We are having 7 children, my 2, my OH's 2, My brothers 2 and my soon to be SIL's one! Although I will have 7 pregnant ladies there so inadvertently im feeding an extra 7 mouths lol.. Luckily the best man (H2B's brother) has refused to bring his 3, phew lol.. All of the kids are leaving around 10 from what I understand! So I am OK with this! I think I will hand deliver the invites and tell them all NO KIDS ;o) my 2 cousins will probably be grateful for the day off so not to worried about their reactions! Anyway im rambling. Thanks ladies you have been a big help! x x x x
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CommentAuthoralibum
a friend of ours was invited to a wedding as he was a best man his wife and daughter were invited to the reception like h2b and i were as it was an intimate ceremony for family and very close friends only,well he bought his wife and daughter to the ceremony and she (daughter) ran around and made noises throughout their ceremony and marred it for them (words from the groom)so we have decided to be pretty blunt and say immediate familys children only for reception but later on anything goes.xxx
CommentAuthoronewilson@btinternet
I'm only inviting my son (10yrs), my BF's son (10yrs) and my 2 nephews and one neice! I've already had a wee chat with the other people who have kid's to let them know, I would like them to enjoy the day without keeping an eye on their kid's, so i'm inviting adults only. They have all been really pleased with this! lol And as a children's nurse, a day off from children would be nice :-)
CommentAuthorWingedSnail
So long as you're polite, I think it's worth putting it on the invite - some people will just assume that their children are included. You will upset some people, but it's your and your H2B's day, not theirs.
CommentAuthorJoneseygal
We rang round people in advance to let them know and explain that we weren't having children at the wedding (with the exception of the flowergirl, bridesmaid & page boy who are our nieces and nephews) partly for numbers reasons but also because we want people to be able to relax without having to worry about looking after their children and having to leave early to put them to bed. Everyone was really understanding although it has meant some people can't come as they would be having a full weekend away travelling from ireland. We also telephoned with verbal save the dates because we were only 3 months away from the date!
If you only put the adults names on the invite that to me says that only the named people are invited. If anyone is not sure they may telephone to clarify. If you want to put it in the invite I think tt would be better on the "supplementary information" rather than on the actual invite.
Good luck! At the end of the day most people understood and said that it is our wedding and it is up to us and people will go with it. Some of them surprised me by being so understanding!! xx
CommentAuthorlala "mod" bunni
edited
i think we should get together work out wording and then all of us "no kids" brides could use it ....... think the following might do????
"please note we are not having any of your snotty nosed kids to our wedding as we would rather not be falling over them as they clean the floor with thier knees , or pay for meals that do not consist of chicken nuggets and spaghetti shapes ....."
what about something along the lines of "to give all you lovely parents a day off the wedding is an adult only affair!" that way you get your request accross but say it without insutling anyone. it's somethin i'm going to have to broach with people at some point too...
lalabunni - i like your wording!!!
CommentAuthorMrs (Dove) Pidgeon
Unfortunately parents would be offended by that Lucie as you are suggesting that people see their kids as work.
Now a extremely happy German housewife and now a Mother!!!!
Islay Jean born 24th June in Hannover.
CommentAuthorClaire Sky
Just posting this again x not sure if any of you saw it, it's not the best worded but i think it says it all.
we are having the same no children, just closest family children so there will only 4! 2 Godchildren and 2 niece's! Not a fan of kids... sorry! x i have done a seperate piece of card to go in the invite's which says
" As most of our friends and family have children, unfortunately we can not invite all of them! We are ONLY including immediate Family children/Godchildren. Sorry if this an inconvenience for you. Look forward too seeing you on the 12th November'