Well I found out a month ago that my dad has another son, he has a wife and 2 daughters. I've met them once, and I wanted my family to be apart of the wedding, so i've asked them to be bridesmaids, and i've asked my half brother to be an usher... Do you think it was to soon to ask them? My wedding is a bit away yet, so I will obviously get to know them a bit more, just feel like maybe it was the wrong time? (I didn't ask when we first met, I did online)
CommentAuthorsarah
It depends... You don't really have much of a connection with them besides a genetic one. I think it's important to start building relationships with them. Since you've already asked my only suggestion would be to maintain contact with them and find a way to include them in your life outside of the wedding and vice versa.
CommentAuthorMrsCross2be
I agree with Sarah. As long as you are comfortable with them but I do think as they are part of the bridal party you do need to build those relationships otherwise they are an integral part of 2 peoples day they know nothing about.
CommentAuthorAshleigh:)
I know that, but I feel like I may have forced it on them, like they didn't really have a choice, feel quite bad.
If you are worried about that what about speaking to your dad and explaining and then maybe he can check with them?
CommentAuthorAshleigh:)
Well it was online so like, "Hi, i have a question, would the girls like to be my bridesmaids at my wedding, and would mat like to be a usher?" ... (It was to his wife), She said it would be lovely and then she said mat said yeah he would
CommentAuthorsarah
If they haven't told you that they feel pressured and you haven't been pressuring them, then I wouldn't worry about it. If you focus on building a relationship with them rather than their roles in the wedding this shouldn't be a problem. The only problem I could foresee is that if closer to the wedding you all haven't developed a closer relationship. In that case they would probably want to step down or you would want them to step down.
CommentAuthorLittle Kettle
I did a similar thing with my half sister. I discovered she was my half sister a couple of years before our wedding and really wanted part of my Dad's family involved. We'd met up a couple of times in those couple of years.
I'm sure your situation is different, but we haven't spoken since. It's a shame as she made our cake and did all the alterations on my wedding dress for me. But as I got to know her and her family, I realised that we were actually worlds apart, had nothing in common (probably due to her being older than my mum - long story!) and in fact I actually didn't really like her. She also managed to really upset my mum at the reception.
I don't mean to scare you, and I do hope that your family works out differently, but thought that you might like another person's perspective that has been through a very similar thing.
Vegas baby!
Moderator
CommentAuthorRosyF77
alot can change in 22months so just take it nice and slow...and get to know them.
you can always change ur mind if things dont go to plan, and it wouldnt be the end of the world x
CommentAuthorLittle Kettle
Vegas baby!
Moderator
CommentAuthorAna40
For now I'd take it slow and steady. Once you feel you know them them and their personalities I'd revisit the idea. X
CommentAuthornadia13
I think it's lovely x
CommentAuthorFernP61
I think it's a really nice idea xx
CommentAuthorValentinaK
I think its great if all are happy and comfortable with it... and that youre not doing it because you feel obligated.
