Not wanting to hi-jack Nicole's thread I thought I'd post my dilemma for some feedback from you lovely lot. I just hope that this makes sense when I am done.
First off I will definitely be changing my family name to H2B's when we marry, so that our family unit all have the same name. This will be the 5th family name I have had in my life (due to different reasons) and I am hoping the last. So I don't really have any ties to a certain family name, other than my current one which I have had for most of my adult life and share with my eldest kids (and obviously their Dad).
My name is currently Sophie Francine Gray, and despite that fact this is my ex's name I actually like how it flows - or maybe I am just used to it??
I am not sure Sophie Francine Ransome (H2B's name) works so well?? I know that you don't use your middle name on a daily basis but it is part of me and I feel it has to be right.
So I am thinking my options are to either add or swap Gray to/for my middle name which will keep my ties to my eldest kids, but still honour my marriage to H2B, our daughter (and any future children).
Sophie Francine Gray Ransome/Sophie Gray Ransome
Or should I stop worrying about my middle name and just change my name to Ransome and stop over thinking things?
I know at the end of the day it's my choice but I am just going in circles so wanted to get an outsiders opinion :)
Started dating: 10th February 2011
Welcomed our little girl: May 2015
I proposed: 23rd December 2015
I finally become Mrs R 17th August 2017
CommentAuthorSamanthaW362
i'll do evertuthing nive to everyone, specially for two of us
CommentAuthorMrs Jones
I think if it's your exes name personally you should dump the Gray part all together as I know my OH wouldn't be impressed if I'd married my ex and wanted to keep his name. However, I don't have children, but your daughters will probably one day get married and be changing their name from Gray anyway! Sophie Francine Ransome sounds good to me!
First Date 26 April 2014
Proposed 27 June 2015
Happily Married 18 June 2016
CommentAuthorMichelleC961
Yeah I agree, think you are overthinking this and just stick to Sophie Francine Ransome
CommentAuthorWundatigga
Thanks for your feedback laides.
My H2B is fine with whatever I choose as other than my part in caring for our kids, I don't have anything to do with my ex.
I have been a Gray for most of my adult life (and for the longest part of my life) and with only being able to see my eldest kids 3 time a year (Easter, Summer and Christmas) I suppose I see it as my connection with them, so I am feeling a sense of guilt at "moving on".
In my heart though I really want to be a Ransome so that I share a name with my H2B and our daughter - so I will stop thinking about it for now and just deal with the feels later :)
Started dating: 10th February 2011
Welcomed our little girl: May 2015
I proposed: 23rd December 2015
I finally become Mrs R 17th August 2017
I understand where you are coming from not wanting to loose that connection with your eldest but they understand the situation and your decision to separate from your ex. I would stop overthinking it and maybe sit down and talk with your eldest about it if it is still worrying you closer to the time.
Met in 2009
He proposed Jan 2014
Will become Mrs P 7th October 2017
