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Wedding Forum - MOH Hates Her Dress!!...

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    • SophieW827
      Got married 3 weeks ago
      Posted: Mar 2nd 2020
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
    Hi everyone, I hope you can help!! Also so sorry for the essay!!

    So, the dresses they have at the moment are all different because the sizes of the girls range from a 4 petite to a 14/16 regular. So the easiest option was for everyone to find something they liked and just make sure they all go well together (I paid for all of the dresses).

    The MOH was rather difficult to please, she is the largest size in the group so I really wanted her to be comfortable (her dress also cost more than the other girl's, but I bought it to keep her happy). She is also helping a lot with the wedding and is one of my oldest and best friends.

    Fast forward... I've changed my mind on the bridesmaid dresses (well, I reverted back to what I wanted in the first place but I was trying to please everyone else!!).

    I've let all of the girls know and I've said they can keep the dresses they currently have (it was just easier, some have paid extra towards them etc.. etc...), they have all been so lovely and supportive and they're glad I'm going to choose something I love for them ...apart from the MOH.

    I want everyone to wear the same lovely, simple dress that I've found. It AMAZINGLY comes in a 4 petite AND goes up to an 18 regular! The straps are adjustable and it ties in at the waist. Bingo! Will fit everyone, there's no fuss. It's flattering. I'm not asking anyone to cover the costs etc.

    However, the MOH has made it VERY clear that she doesn't like it. I still asked her to try it & she honestly looks lovely in it!! But she HATES it and is now being so difficult and it's really put a downer on it all for me. She keeps saying it will suit the other girls because they are smaller, and no matter how much I tell her it looks absolutely fine and genuinely lovely, she's not having it. I did suggest we try to find something different that would match the other girls, but there's nothing I like that she's showing me as a alternative, and I really want everyone in the same.

    It's now getting a bit frosty and I don't know what to do... I've suggested getting it altered, trying a different size & so on, but she's refusing everything.

    I searched HIGH AND LOW to find something that would fit everyone and will look nice but also not cost a fortune because this is the second round of dresses.

    I really don't want the hassle of trying to find something else when I'm already out of pocket. After some back and forth, she has - through gritted teeth - said she will wear it but I'm gutted to be honest. There's a bad feeling in the air and I don't want her to feel 'ugly' in the dress, but I also think there's nothing for her to be complaining about...

    Please help. Should I change them AGAIN to find something she likes or just stick with the new option which I like and everyone else likes??
    • Itsjustkay86
      Got married 17 months ago
      Posted: Mar 15th 2020
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
    Absolutely do not change your mind. At the end of the day, it is YOUR day and not hers. If she cant get on board then tell her she can either get with it for one day or can wear what she wants but she wont be in the bridal party. I made myself really ill trying to please by bridesmaids and my MOH was my biggest problem too. The week before my wedding i was so stressed out i blew up and gave everyone a piece of my mind and funnily enough it calmed the situation. You're the one getting married, not your MOH. Sometimes they need some straight talking to make them remember that. You also have other bridesmaids who are supportive and they can totally back you up if you need it. Good Luck!!
    • SerenaP2
      Getting married in 4 days
      Posted: Mar 17th 2020
    I agree with @Itsjustkay86 by the time the wedding comes along she will have forgotten all about it. If she really is your oldest and closest friend she will want to see you happy on your big day. Focus on other things allow her some breathing space and fingers crossed it will all be ok in a few weeks. Goodluck!! x
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