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  1.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
      Got married 8 years ago
      Posted: Jun 16th 2012
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
      edited
     
    Hi Everyone

    Just checked my postbox and have just received confirmation of mine and H2B's registration onto the marriage preparation course that we have to do before my parish priest will complete the paperwork for us to be married.

    The course in one full day and one evening in the autumn.

    I'm not entirely sure what to expect. I do understand it is so that H2B and I can learn and reflect on how to overcome any difficulties faced in marriage etc.etc. and should help make the relationship stronger but I really am unsure of what to expect from the course such as what it'll be like, the experience. It'll be a group session, apparently with approx 8-10 other couples and it's run by some married couples of the parish and the parish priest.

    Has anyone else done this course and have any advice or can share their experience with me please?

    Ta
    x

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  2.  
    • Little Kettle
      CommentAuthorLittle Kettle
      Got married 9 years ago
      Posted: Jun 16th 2012
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    A friend of mine is currently doing one with her h2b. It's a very different format though. It's 8 consecutive weeks of one evening a week and there are about 100 couples there, yes you DID read right, 100 couples! They talk about what kind of obsticles relationships can come across and how people overcome them. The main theme, she said, is communication.
    After the 8 weeks are up, you are allocated to an 'experienced' couple who have been married for a few years and they invite you round to dinner where you can ask them questions.

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  3.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
      Got married 8 years ago
      Posted: Jun 16th 2012
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Wow, 100 couples! That's a lot!

    I agree communication is key in any relationship and being able to talk without shouting and listening to eachother too. Compromise is also important.

    Is your friend doing it with the Catholic church? There are so many different formats we could've done. From a one day intensive course, a full weekend course, what we are doing or a number of short 1 hour sessions with the parish priest over 6-8 weeks.

    xx

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  4.  
    • lows
      CommentAuthorlows
      Got married 9 years ago
      Posted: Jun 16th 2012
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    We had to do this before we could get married, it was fine, started with some question and answer type things about relationships, what to do in different situations etc.
    Then the talked about marriage and how its give and take and the commitment etc etc.
    Then we also went though the actual ceremony and the different options and elements of the wedding including types of readings, hymns, prayers etc.

    You will be fine hun, and its great as it all starts to feel very real afterwards.
    xx
  5.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
      Got married 8 years ago
      Posted: Jun 16th 2012
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Thanks lows. I think it sounds really interesting and looking forward to doing something constructive and meaningful. I think it sounds like it'll help focus the mind on the important things of a marriage when I'm getting consumed with all the fancy wedding stuff xx

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    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  6.  
    • Llosa
      CommentAuthorLlosa
      Got married 7 years ago
      Posted: Jun 16th 2012
      Is poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Oh let me know how it goes...we have to do one aswell :( scared hehe.

    Might be really helpful though (our vicar gave us the sound advice of "COMPROMISE!" which i have been trying to practise for a while hehe.
  7.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
      Got married 8 years ago
      Posted: Jun 16th 2012
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Will do, not doing it until the autumn but will update you. Compromise and two way communication is always good advice and I try to practise it too ;)

    Do you have yours booked yet?
    x

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  8.  
    • Llosa
      CommentAuthorLlosa
      Got married 7 years ago
      Posted: Jun 16th 2012
      Is poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadge
     
    not yet but we have our meeting in oct

    hehe yes i am guilty of wanting things My way, so its actually really helped stop tiny silly arguments
  9.  
    • Little Kettle
      CommentAuthorLittle Kettle
      Got married 9 years ago
      Posted: Jun 16th 2012
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Not sure if it's Catholic or CofE, tbh. Sorry! x

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  10.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
      Got married 8 years ago
      Posted: Jun 16th 2012
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    I'm guessing most churches will do a marriage prep course?

    Lol - I think most of us want things our way.

    H2B is fairly laid back and we seem to agree on most things, we've never actually had a full blown argument, we've had disagreements but always sorted them :D
    x

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  11.  
    • Llosa
      CommentAuthorLlosa
      Got married 7 years ago
      Posted: Jun 16th 2012
      Is poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadge
     
    i think we have had probably one major argument though out our 6 years together, but silly little bickerings is what usually happens lol.

    I'm getting married in C of E and they are offering the course...are you catholic in indreams?
  12.  
    • madhen
      CommentAuthormadhen
      Got married 7 years ago
      Posted: Jun 16th 2012
      Is poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadge
     
    are they just offering it as optional or do you have to do it?
  13.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
      Got married 8 years ago
      Posted: Jun 16th 2012
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Yep - I'm Catholic.

    Madhen - it's mandatory, we have to do it before my parish priest will do the paperwork. I also got to get letters from all the parishes I've lived in since I was 16 to say that I've never married and am therefore free to marry.

    I'm waiting for our first major row, it's gotta come one day but both of us tend to sulk and whinge more than scream and shout.

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  14.  
    • madhen
      CommentAuthormadhen
      Got married 7 years ago
      Posted: Jun 16th 2012
      Is poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Woah...that's crazy....I don't think I could ever get letters from all the parishes I've lived in....nuts!
  15.  
    • Llosa
      CommentAuthorLlosa
      Got married 7 years ago
      Posted: Jun 16th 2012
      Is poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadge
     
    omg..thats a lot of work lol...but i can see why they do it...make it harder to marry so you appreciate it more.

    Ours is worded like we have to go on our contract but the minister made it sound optional...confused
  16.  
    • madhen
      CommentAuthormadhen
      Got married 7 years ago
      Posted: Jun 16th 2012
      Is poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadge
     
    true! i suppose you may as well go along and see what it's like :)
  17.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
      Got married 8 years ago
      Posted: Jun 17th 2012
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    I know the Catholic church make the course mandatory but no idea about other denominations.

    I am lucky in that since I was 16 I've only every lived in two parishes including the one I'm in at the moment so shouldn't be too hard. The church we're marrying in is the one my parents married in and me and my sister were baptised in and I had my first holy communion :D
    x

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  18.  
    • madhen
      CommentAuthormadhen
      Got married 7 years ago
      Posted: Jun 17th 2012
      Is poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadge
     
    sorted!
  19.  
    • CommentAuthorbridalmiss
      Posted: Jun 17th 2012
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    We had a 1 day session in a c of e church and it was really practical about how to compromise when you're married, what to think about if you have conflict etc, was very useful etc x
  20.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
      Got married 8 years ago
      Posted: Jun 17th 2012
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Sounds like it will be really useful and interesting.

    Reading the agenda for the course, sounds like there is some "getting to know eachother" type themes in terms of exploring deep held beliefs and attitudes to better understand eachother. Some of it sounds quite deep too.

    I hope it's as beneficial as I think it sounds.
    x

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  21.  
    • MrsShaw
      CommentAuthorMrsShaw
      Got married 9 years ago
      Posted: Jun 17th 2012
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    We got married in C of E and didn't even get offered marriage prep classes. Our vicar said that the majority of the time couples live together already so know what to expect and all marriage prep classes are, are to prepare you for spending each day together etc.

    I don't like the sound of them, if you need telling how to live with your partner, then it makes me wonder why you want to get married. But obviously in some parishes its mandatory.. :/

    xx
  22.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
      Got married 8 years ago
      Posted: Jun 17th 2012
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    If H2B and I were already living together the church wouldn't be too impressed ...................Catholic church and the whole no s£x before marriage.
    xx

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  23.  
    • MrsShaw
      CommentAuthorMrsShaw
      Got married 9 years ago
      Posted: Jun 17th 2012
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Are you living together? I know that if we were going to get married at my parents church we would have had to put my address down as theirs, but thats more to do with the legal side of the connection.

    xx
  24.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
      Got married 8 years ago
      Posted: Jun 17th 2012
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    No, we're not living together ..............yet. He's just gone home actually, came over to be fed lol, poor thing, had a hard time at work. We're looking for a house together at the moment. He's sold his place, just waiting for exchange date and I'm the same with my flat. No idea how to overcome the question when we get parish paperwork done around Christmas time if we're moved in together by then. Can't lie to the Church so may just have to tell the truth and deal with it :S

    x

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  25.  
    • CommentAuthorbridalmiss
      Posted: Jun 17th 2012
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    We got married C of E and when we gave our details with the same address as each other, there were no questions asked - although I did feel terrible about it, the vicar was absolutely fine. The prep day wasn't compulsory either, our church just does one per year and invites all couples getting married to attend, but you don't have to - we had some Mr and Mrs quizzes too which were actually rather fun - and relieving when we scored quite similarly on each other! :-)
  26.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
      Got married 8 years ago
      Posted: Jun 17th 2012
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    I think the C of E may be a little different to the Catholic church where "living in sin" is frowned upon although tbh, how many couples don't live together before tying the knot these days?

    The sooner H2B and I live together the better.
    x

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  27.  
    • KellyD
      CommentAuthorKellyD
      Got married 8 years ago
      Posted: Jun 17th 2012
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    im getting married in a catholic church and my priest was fine with the fact that we have lived together for four years. he said that he doesnt believe many couples dont live together before marriage nowadays. my priest is quite upto date lol he only looks like hes in his early 40's
    x

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  28.  
    • Linzi-jo
      CommentAuthorLinzi-jo
      Got married 6 years ago
      Posted: Jun 17th 2012
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    InDreamland I wouldn't worry too much, I dont think Catholic churches are actually as strict as they make out they are! I know someone who got married in a catholic church after having children! Would have been pretty hard for the to convince their priest they hadn't had s3x! lol And if you feel that bad about it, tell him you are in seperate bedrooms until you are married! lol xxx

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  29.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
      Got married 8 years ago
      Posted: Jun 17th 2012
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Thanks ladies. Fingers crossed the priest marrying us and my parish priest doing the paperwork are as understanding as all the ones you've come across or know people have come across.

    TBH, even if we're not living together, let's face it, we go on holiday together and stay with eachother most weekends he's not working! ;)

    Hopefully we'll be ok.
    xx

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  30.  
    • Linzi-jo
      CommentAuthorLinzi-jo
      Got married 6 years ago
      Posted: Jun 17th 2012
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    I'm sure you will be fine! If I have found out anything organising a wedding it is that we get paranoid over the smallest of things, and over think them waaaaay too much! lol xxx

    Members signature icon
    Got together 14.02.2008
    Got engaged 31.12.2010
    Will become a Mrs on 30.08.2014 xxxxxx
  31.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
      Got married 8 years ago
      Posted: Jun 17th 2012
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    I know what you mean hun but I keep getting told stuff and panicking.

    My parish priest at first wasn't happy as I actually don't attend mass there as I go to Westminster cathedral instead as it's down the road from work so it's convenient for me (I know it's a very poor excuse but at least I go weekly). I have no problem with attending at my local parish church though so will do.

    Then we're giving notice on Thursday and worried registrar will be funny about getting married in church so far away out of the parish and out of the diocese even and as in one of my other threads I must worship there as my main place of worship, therefore on the phone I was told to go there a few times before we give notice, so I have done, but still worried something will not be right and they won't give H2B and I our marriage license.

    The marriage license and Church are so important, without them there is no wedding :S

    xx

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  32.  
    • Linzi-jo
      CommentAuthorLinzi-jo
      Got married 6 years ago
      Posted: Jun 17th 2012
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Wow that is awful. But, you have done all you can do to get your wedding license now, so try to not to worry about it. Hopefully you will speak to someone who is understanding about it all. As for people telling you stuff, I have had the same, but everyone tells me something different and then I end up worrying about all of them! lol I am sure you will be fine. As I said, you have done everything that you can do, there is nothing more they can ask of you really is there? xxx

    Members signature icon
    Got together 14.02.2008
    Got engaged 31.12.2010
    Will become a Mrs on 30.08.2014 xxxxxx
  33.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
      Got married 8 years ago
      Posted: Jun 17th 2012
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    No, you're right hun, I have done everything I can. It's a 2 hour round trip to the church, plus the 1 hour in mass makes it's 3 hours every Sunday morning (ok, I did one Saturday morning) just to go to mass in the church we're marrying in just for the marriage license, once I get that piece of paper (presuming I do get it ok) I will start going regularly to my local parish church rather than westminster cathedral (although I like going in the week so I may just do mass twice a week).

    xx

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  34.  
    • ClareS
      CommentAuthorClareS
      Got married 8 years ago
      Posted: Jun 18th 2012
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    my first marriage was in c of e church. We had 3 x 2hour evening classes. was mainly about communication. The first night there was a little quiz thing on trying to answer questions about your other half. Another night was people from the church talking about the importance of communication in a marriage etc. I guess I missed the part about him comminucationg physically with his hands and we split up after that.
  35.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
      Got married 8 years ago
      Posted: Jun 18th 2012
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Oh no hun! Communication with abuse is never acceptable.

    I really am hoping it'll be a useful course. It certainly sounds interesting from what everyone has said on here xx

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  36.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
      Got married 8 years ago
      Posted: Jun 18th 2012
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Oh no hun! Communication with abuse is never acceptable.

    I really am hoping it'll be a useful course. It certainly sounds interesting from what everyone has said on here xx

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  37.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
      Got married 8 years ago
      Posted: Oct 20th 2012
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Evening ladies!

    So ............H2B and I have completed our marriage preparation course and I have to say, I was pleasantly surprised, enjoyed the course and found it very interesting!

    I'd certainly recommend it xx

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  38.  
    • MrsC
      CommentAuthorMrsC
      Got married 8 years ago
      Posted: Oct 23rd 2012
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Good to know it went well, do you mind elaborating on anything they talked about ?

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  39.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
      Got married 8 years ago
      Posted: Oct 23rd 2012
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    They talked about marriage, what it means in the Catholic Church, understanding eachother, how eachother react to things and expect from eachother. Also, what is important to each of us so it's about knowing eachother and understanding eachother. There was a session about understanding yourself too and what you learnt in terms of relationship behaviour from your parents. Then the obligatory talk about natural family planning and praying together as a couple and a family.

    It was very interesting.

    Are you going to be doing a course? xx

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  40.  
    • MrsLowe
      CommentAuthorMrsLowe
      Got married 8 years ago
      Posted: Oct 23rd 2012
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I carnt believe you have done yours already, ours isnt untill march time :( glad it went ok though :) x
  41.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
      Got married 8 years ago
      Posted: Oct 23rd 2012
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    It'll come around really fast hun.

    Will your priest do the paperwork before you do the course? We had to do ours before our paperwork will get done.

    xx

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  42.  
    • MrsLowe
      CommentAuthorMrsLowe
      Got married 8 years ago
      Posted: Oct 23rd 2012
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    what paperwork lol we did do abit of paperwork during the meeting we had with him and during that we had to sign to say we will bring our children up as catholics etc amongst other things... so maybe i have done the paperwork x
  43.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
      Got married 8 years ago
      Posted: Oct 23rd 2012
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    That is the paperwork hun lol. That bit my parish priest won't do until we had dome the marriage prep course.

    I also need ot get a letter from the Churches of the parishes I've lived in to say that I'm free to marry i.e. not married before.
    x

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  44.  
    • LauraJo87
      CommentAuthorLauraJo87
      Got married 7 years ago
      Posted: Oct 27th 2012
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Bump

    My Beating Heart Belongs To You
    30 August 2013

    The First Day Of My Happily Ever After
  45.  
    • EmilyB10
      CommentAuthorEmilyB10
      Got married 7 years ago
      Posted: Oct 28th 2012
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Hi, I'm new to this site. Me and my h2b are getting married in February 2014 and we have been asked to attend a wedding prep day in February 2013. The vicar said that it was to 'learn about marriage' but also a time to find out about the suppliers the Church have access to for flowers etc. They have congregation members who will do wedding flowers for a donation to the Church (bargain!) Quite excited really as it's only 1 day and we get free lunch :)
  46.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
      Got married 8 years ago
      Posted: Oct 29th 2012
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Hi Emily and to the site.

    The marriage prep course is actually quite interesting so do attend and approach with an open mind.

    Hope you enjoy the wedding planning xx

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  47.  
    • TracyR56
      CommentAuthorTracyR56
      Posted: Oct 30th 2012
      edited
     
    My H2B is Catholic and I'm C of E. I've agreed that we'll get married in a Catholic Church as it means a lot to him.
    Went to Mass yesterday (my first time), met the priest afterwards and he was lovely. He mentioned a marriage preparation course that he wants us to do, but he said not until the start of 2014 as otherwise 'we'll be ready too soon' lol

    I'm looking forward to it though as it'll mean it's almost time to tie the knot!

    Just to add to the paperwork, we've chosen a Church in the middle of where we both live so we need permission from my H2B Priest that we can marry in a different Parish.
  48.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
      Got married 8 years ago
      Posted: Oct 30th 2012
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Hi Tracy
    We have the same, need paperwork from my parish priest so we can marry in another parish and for me to marry a non-Catholic. Should all be ok though hopefully. Hope that when the time comes you enjoy the course and all the preparation/planning xx

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  49.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
      Got married 8 years ago
      Posted: Jan 17th 2013
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Bump for Kirstylou xx

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  50.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
      Got married 8 years ago
      Posted: Feb 11th 2013
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Bump for Tori xx

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

 
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