Hiya Ladies!

I don't expect a reply! I just need to blow off some steam! It might be a long one depends how I get whilst typing!

Here it goes...........................

I am sooooooooooooo unbelievely p*ssed off and sick to the back teeth of H2B family!! Mainly his dad, his dads girlfriend and H2B brother!

Firstly when we got engaged 6 years ago as its a small village somebody told H2B dad before we even had a chance too! We got engaged whilst away for the weekend with friends and a friend told a parent who saw H2B dad in the pub and congratulated him! This was before we had even drove home! So when we announced it to him (we didn't know he knew) expecting a 'Congratulations' etc we felt a bit flat when he just said I know and then (with me not in ear shot) told H2B that he was silly!!! Meh! We apologised prefusely about that the fact he had found out before us orginally telling him and thought nomore of it!!

5 years on we booked the date after having the twins and us wanting to be a proper family all sharing the same name and H2B told his dad who proceeded to say 'Why did you go and do that for? Are you stupid? You don't have no money etc etc!' Never asked him for a penny to contribute and he has no idea about our financial situation!!!!

6 months into planning we asked him and H2B brother if they would like to be wearing the same suit as best man groom etc to which they said NOWAY! Never wore a suit! Don't intend to start now so I thought lets leave it, let the dust settle and I approached the subject again! Nope never wearing a suit etc etc! So that p*ssed me off! The he says that he is sitting at the back of the church as he 'doesn't do churches' fair enough I thought!!

Getting further on with planning I broached the subject of buttonholes I showed his gf and said would you and H2B dad like one?? She said she would check with the dad and come back and said no! No reason given just no! So again I thought I'd leave it....

....a couple of weeks ago I wanted to order them so I approached them both when they were out in a pub (they had only just got there so were not drunk) and H2B and I said I need to order the buttonholes are you sure you dont want one?? Cue another nope, not wearing a buttonhole! H2B says but dad in the photos it will show your part of the wedding party, to which H2B dad says...Photos?? What photos?? I'm not being in ANY photos! In all the weddings I have been too I've never been in photos and I don't intend on starting now! To which I could see H2B getting worked up! H2b said well that doesn't look good in a few years time when our twins look back on photos and say where is grandad etc! To which he just shrugged! To which h2b told him your a Fing ar*e**le and why the F are you bothering to come to the wedding in the first place??? Stormed off outside to calm down and have a ciggie and whilst he was gone I could hear H2B Dads gf going on and on saying 'why do people think they can change you, you are who you are etc etc! I nearly flipped my lid! It's not a case of trying to change anyone its a case of putting his eldest son first for a change!!!!!! Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!

Still, so no suits, photos or buttonholes for them!! So now today H2B tells me that his brother isn't coming to our wedding as he has rebooked his holiday and it falls over our wedding! EXSCUSE ME! What the F**K?!?!?!?!? He is supposed to be helping me on the morning of the wedding set up the room at the venue that HE runs!!!!!! I'm sooooo fuming and upset! Trying not to show it but I seriously what to deck the cr*p out of someone! Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr! They honestly don't give a stuff about anyone but themselves!!!!

His mum is looking forward to it and so is H2B Mums partner! What annoys me is that the mums partner feels like HE has to take a back seat because he helped split the marraige up (ifgwim) as his mum had an affair but they have been together for 10 years and H2B has forgiven his mum and partner etc so I want them to feel involved in the day more!

Wow! This is one big rant! SORRY!

A very stressed, annoyed, peed off Lady who seriously wishes H2B had a better family! :S

xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

oh hun family politics are sh*t i'd let them live there sorry little lives and have the ppl involved who care!!! xxx

I dont know what to say other than (((((((HUGS))))))) I would still order a buttonhole as it would be a small price to pay even if he still said no on the day. Rather than people think that you left them out on purpose. x

I would leave him to it. At the end of the day he is the one who will have to answer the questions from ur twins when they are older. Carry on (although I appreciate it must be hard) and maybe have h2b's mum's partner in the photos. His dad might feel a twang of jealousy then! x

Im sorry your so stressed huni.... I think I would be very upset if marks dad refused to wear a suit, hugs huni XXXXX

awww hun big hugs!!! i thought i had problems!! to be honest i think you are being very brave if it was me id be saying that they not invited if they cant be bothered to do things for you and h2b for once in their life!! xx i hope you get it sorted out though hun xxx

I agree sounds like mil2b partner is being more of a father figure then his real dad and if on the day he has a problem its own fault you gave him plenty of warning

As Long as you both have a fab day don't worry. Oh and if the twins ask way granddad isn't in the photos tell them after all you.have nothing to hide or be ashamed of.

Loads of luck xxx

so if hes not going to wear a suit (same as groom or otherwise) what does he plan to turn up in jeans???? all the weddings ive been to ALL the men have worn either a full suit or shirt and suit trousers.

Blimey! I think all of us who read this will need a cuppa or something to calm down! That's awful!
It amazes me how "family" can be so selfish and rude - no wonder so many people elope!
I agree with the other ladies - h2b's mum's partner sounds like a much better person to be in the bridal party :)
As for the brother... grrrrrrr!! xx

Hi ladies!

Thank you for all your replies! I thought maybe I was over reacting a bit but I'm glad you all think they are incredibly selfish! To top all that off H2B saw his brother last night who said that he had been joking about going away over our wedding and he is infact coming! I could have screamed! Why would someone be so cruel??? Grrrrrr! Feel like telling him not to bother but I need my venue! Lol! I have decided H2B dad can go run and jump!! I'm not ordering a buttonhole and if he wants to look like any other guest or even turn up in jeans (he 'jokingly' with meaning behind it said this) then thats up to him but I am not wasting our hard earned cash on him! I have kept him on my photography schedule so that he looks like a tw*t when he refuses in front of EVERYONE! Which will show him up! I have decided to try and not worry or stress (easier said than done) about them and to let them get on with it! Might even just ignore them on the day! See how they like being brushed aside and ignored! There are plenty of friends who are so excited for us who can't get over how they have acted (believe me I have made sure people know what they are up too) xxxx

I totally agree Pinky. I mean seriously, it's his son's wedding and he is behaving like a brat! I would involved your h2b's step-dad as much as you like. If his dad was to behave like a sulky child, let him. He's the one who is going to look like a total idiot.

Mrs Walker soon

sorry becky....I read the post but not all of the replies, in which case it just goes to show that we are all singing from the same hymn book lol