I was wondering if anyone is considering having a prenup with their H2B. Please don't tell me I'm preparing to fail or being unromantic as I've been through this in my head already and I can't decide if it's a good idea! I own a property which is rented out and have just been left a substantial amount of inhertitance money. My H2B has no assests or savings. We live in a rented property and don't have any shared financial arrangements (as I'm an independent kinda girl!) I've worked hard to get where I am today and would hate to loose even more than my marriage should it all go wrong. Thanks for your thoughts. xx
CommentAuthortweedwedding
I don't think it's a bad idea - I don't personally have anything like that of worth, but if I did I would want it protecting, so I'd look into it that's for sure. Yes, obviously we all want to live happily ever after, but sadly it doesn't always work out that way...I'd go speak to a solicitor and or a financial adviser and see where you stand - think it's worth asking the question :-) x
CommentAuthorUnknown
i did a thread about this a little while ago. h2b has a mortegage on the flat that we live in and my dad has a house in spain worth quite a bit, which i will inherit with my 2 sisters. my dad actaully asked us to do one as he said although we are getting married for life you just do not know what is going to happen and he wants his house to stay in the family which is understand. there is no way i would would to give h2b half of my third!! it has been in the family over 50 years now and want to keep it that way!!
they are legal in this country now but you have to do it properly with a solicitor so there are no loop holes in it.
We havnt got round to it yet but i think we will do one.
some people say it means you dont love each other but to us it is securing what is ours before marriage. xx
CommentAuthormelliecake
I don't think it's a bad idea at all. You deserve to keep what you worked for. I would never say it means a couple don't love each other. I would actually go as far to say it proves the love of the one signing it as they aren't in it for the money.
CommentAuthorx ashlil x
i think it's a good idea, i would do one if i was in your situation x
I dont think it is a bad idea at all and it does not mean you are preparing for failure. It is very difficult when partners have unequal assests. I went through this with my ex where I needed to protect the deposit for the house. At the time he said I had nothing to worry about (of course!) and he would always honour the fact I had invested in the property but he was happy to sign a deed before we bought the house. When he left me he tried to have the deed overturned and fought like mad to get my money! Unless we were going in as equal partners / equal assets I would always protect myself. My h2b actually wants to sort it legally so it does not look like he is in it for the money! ha ha
CommentAuthorMrsWade2B
I dont think its a bad idea at all......im a student and H2B has only just left uni so between us we don't really have anything of value but if i was in your situation i can definitely see why you'd want one xx
CommentAuthorXLittleMissMe!X
Its a hard one. I nearly got married to a sponger who luckily I bailed out of a wedding a couple of months before hand which is a good job as he tried to take my assets anyway. The problem is once you live with someone for 5 years they become your common law partner anyway which gives them legal rights. I didn't know this but by all accounts if I had been with my ex a couple of months longer he would have been legally entitled to my house etc. He did actually stop the sale on my house saying he had financial interest in it but because I could prove that he hadn't been with me for 5 years he didn't have a leg to stand on. I can't see how a pre nup gets you out of this unless they have changed the laws since. I think you need to check out if they are really legal yet (rumours change all the time) as is it worth you making your h2b feel like you don't trust him for nothing?
CommentAuthorMrs (Dove) Pidgeon
The common law thing is myth... unmarried couples have no legal rights to each others property.
Now a extremely happy German housewife and now a Mother!!!!
Islay Jean born 24th June in Hannover.
CommentAuthorLisa Ramos
I am definitely having a prenup and my h2b, understands that. I had a serious accident 4 years ago and was awarded a large compensation settlement and there is no way I could afford to give him half, if we did split up.
I love my lickle Ava
CommentAuthorLisa Ramos
I am definitely having a prenup and my h2b, understands that. I had a serious accident 4 years ago and was awarded a large compensation settlement and there is no way I could afford to give him half, if we did split up.
I love my lickle Ava
CommentAuthorJilly17
When we signed the Deed of Trust to protect my property I asked if it would become void if we were married and the solicitor told me no. I never got to investigate that as we never got close to marriage in the end, he waitied until the house was gutted and finished before he left and I truly believe he did it for the money. There must be some way of doing it though.
CommentAuthorMrsC.Wade2B
I think in your situation then yes it is a good idea, my h2b had a similar sitution with his ex although they were not married (was together 6yrs) when she cheated on him and they split he had to go court to fight to keep his flat even though it is a council flat. anyway he won the right to keep the flat (despite having a son together) he still had to give her almost all the belongings in the flat even the cooker! (even tho she'd shacked up with the bloke she cheated on my oh with) so yes do take it into real consideration and do it all properly x
Tomorrow is never promised to anyone, So Dance until your
feet ache, Laugh until your side hurts,
Say I Love You to those you love
For tomorrow may never come x
CommentAuthorXLittleMissMe!X
Dove believe me I had the solicitors letters! Its not a myth. If they have been living there for 5 years then they can make a claim saying they have financial interest in your property. That is why when you rent a house out you have to get them to sign that they have no financial interest in your property.
CommentAuthorpennieb-MrsRiley
My h2b just remortgaged our house. Because I have lived with him for more than 6 months I had to sign to say that I was happy for the mortgage to proceed since, in the event of him failing to meet the repayments, I would have a financial claim on the house and therefore be able to prevent a sale. Legally, I now have a financial stake in h2b's property despite us not being married and only having lived together for 2 1/2 years.
As it happens, I have suggested to Steve that we do a prenup to protect him, but he refuses because he honestly does not feel it is necessary, so I guess I'm a lucky gal :)
Now, finally, Mrs Riley
I hope you don't mind that I put down in words
How wonderful life is while you're in the world
I have the greatest husband!
CommentAuthorMoomie
I think it applies to anyone living in your property unless you have a formal tenancy agreement. As soon they contribute to a bill/ mortgage payment directly or indirectly, they have a claim against your property.
CommentAuthorMoomie
Also, prenups aren't legally enforced in the uk but it does give a good indication of each other's intentions at the start of the marriage if you ever do split.
CommentAuthorLuce21
Personally we arent having a prenup - coz neither of us has got anything-hahaha.
BUT totally for them if you have assets/dont enter into the relationship on equal parts.
xx
CommentAuthorljeh92
H2B has a mortgage, with 29years left to pay.. no savings or anything, he will just have his parents house when they pass along with his brother, but i have nothing.. my parents havnt even got their own house.. hes been married before and she took loads of his money, he had to get a loan out to pay her! but he hasnt asked me, if he did i would understand, its something you have to consider when you knows things may not last forever. its sad but these things happen!
Soon to be Mrs Laura Naylor !!
24th June 2011
CommentAuthoralmostmrswood
We've no need for a prenup as neither of us have any substancial assets. I think it's a good idea but be careful how you ask your h2b to sign it. You don't want him taking offense and thinking that youthink he's after you for your money!
CommentAuthoralmostmrswood
OMG my spelling was awful in that last post. Just re-read it!
CommentAuthorlovelylainee
To be honest it is a personal thing that you and your H2b should decide upon. If for your sake and keeping inheritance and property separate you think the prenup is best then that is your decision right there! x
I married the love of my life 23/06/2012
Our little boys are so cute!
CommentAuthorjodie b
i think its each to their own as long as your both happy with it, i would if i were in the situation xx
CommentAuthorloubyscooby
I think they are a good idea if you have things already and I don't think they unromantic. We are having one because we have both worked hard to get our own homes - I have a 4 bed and he has a narrow boat but we can still live there if the other one pops their clogs but if we did go our seperate ways we keep what we bring in. When we get married pensions /shares etc get split between us equally and the kids from previous relationships. We all go into this beliving it will last but I think it pays to be cautious x
CommentAuthorlil miss sunshine
i would if i had much stuff of value will have to rely on trust and faith
and now the next chapter
CommentAuthorUnknown
pre nups are legal in the country now. they were legalised a few months ago.
h2b remortagaed his flat where i live last year to get some more money for the wedding and his current mortgage was ending anyway. because i lived there i had to sign a piece of paper saying that i did not pay anything towards the mortgage which i dont (i refuse) and if he didnt pay then although i live there legally i wouldnt have to either. i had to get a witness to sign this aswell.
pre nups are quite expensive to do tho i think but they are worth it xx
CommentAuthorMrsC2B
Thank you for your support and advice. I've been quoted £1500 to have the legal agreement drawn up, which considering the value of everything isn't too bad. Next to bring it up with H2B. I'll let you know how that goes ... xx
CommentAuthorUnknown
i was wondering what h2b would say and he actually agreed with me!! xx
CommentAuthorRhiannonollie
I say do it. As much as you and your H2B are in love now no one knows what the future holds.
If i had things to protect then I would!!
And if H2B thinks you wrong to do it, then well, its not his choice - he should turn around and say - Im marrying you not your money - do what you want with that because its yours! as long as you love me! :)
