Hi guys, I'm having a bit of trouble deciding who to invite from work. The thing with my job is I'm a teacher but it's in an Autistic base, more of a learning support role as all my kids are in mainstream classes and I extract groups to work with at different times in the day. This means I work with about 4/5 different teachers and also all the kids have support assistants I work closely with. I have friends in work who are coming all day but there are other people I'd like to invite at night. Thing is I can't put an open invitation on, it's a big school with over 40 staff - I couldn't fit them all in or afford to transport them a
BUT, here's what's worrying me......my friend got married last year and picked about 6 of the support staff to give personal invites to, the ones she got on with best and worked with most closely. Well I heard on the grapevine there was a lot of b*tching about it, people saying things like 'ooh did you get a golden ticke' blah blah. Should I just invite who I want and suffer the snide comments of others, or should I just invite my friends that are coming all day and nobody else at evening time, even tho I'd really like a select few of them there!? Should it be all or none? Or can I hand pick and offend? what would you do?
02.07.11
All you need is Love!
Why is the rum always gone?
CommentAuthorXLittleMissMe!X
TBH I would just invite those closest to you and that you have personal involvement with. The ones that b1tch are the ones that are not invited so do you really care what they think? Why should you invite people you never talk to, don't know or don't like? Just because you have to work with each other doesn't mean that you have to like them outside of work time. I would send personal invites out to the people that matter to you.
CommentAuthorPennylane
I think you're right - you've no idea what a school full of (mainly) women is like on the b*tching tho! I know I'll get spoken about but hey guess you can't please everyone x
02.07.11
All you need is Love!
Why is the rum always gone?
CommentAuthormitch2509
i have this problem too, there are some people ii would like to invite to the day but i dont want to get bitched about lol... so im doing an open invite to everyone on the night
CommentAuthorXLittleMissMe!X
Yeah but it will all be done behind your back and tbh it doesn't matter what you do they will find something to have a go about so I wouldn't worry about it.
I work at a childrens nursery and am only inviting some of them and they are mainly the girls i get on with but also socialise with outside of work, those that i haven't are normally the ones busy sticking knifes in peoples backs anyway and i'd rather not have them there. If they don't like it tough, that's what i say. Also my h2b gave me some good advice to think about to help make my mind up, if they we're getting married or having a party and was the other way round would they invite you? I realised that actually those i'd not invited probably wouldn't no, so it made it much easier for me to decide. x
CommentAuthormartay (marie)
id invite who you really want too, and stuff the others. no matter what you do you will never please everyone. i am inviting one of my oldest friends to the evening do only, but i know shes expecting a full day invite. she wont say anything to my face but i know she will be funny about it. unfortunately i cant and wont change the guest list!
if they have got anything to bitch about i wouldnt regard them as friends!
xx
all ive got to give to you are these 5 words tonight
Thank you for loving me, for being my eyes when i couldnt
see. for parting my lips when i couldnt breathe
thank you for loving me xxx
CommentAuthorPennylane
I was tempted to do the open invite cos I'm sure they won't all come, but there's always a chance that more than I think will come then I'd need to up my buffet and put more buses on and tbh my budget is stretched to it's limit! I'd rather spend that money on putting more family/friends up to an all day invite rathen than accomodating people I don't really have that much interaction with.
My problem is I care too much what people think!
02.07.11
All you need is Love!
Why is the rum always gone?
CommentAuthormitch2509
i know for a fact that the people i would of invited will come and probs the people i dont wanna invite wont come !
CommentAuthormummybez
I'm the same penny and h2b says i'm too nice for my own good, but like i said if it was the other way round would they invite you. Those that your sure would then fine, those that wouldn't don't, your be suprised how much easier it is to decide. x
CommentAuthorPennylane
that's a really good point. Most of them - no I don't think they would x
02.07.11
All you need is Love!
Why is the rum always gone?
CommentAuthormummybez
There you are hon, it makes it easier to decide eh, it certainly did me lol x
CommentAuthorJillDudley
If there's one thing I've learnt about weddings is that someone will always have something to complain about!
Just invite who you want - the others will moan regardless. We've invited all of h2b's work for the evening - maybe up to 60 with partners! I don't think they'll all come but it doesn't make much difference if they do - they'll be providing their own transport and we're having a hog roast so no price per head in the evening. If we had to pay it would be a very different story! Don't feel bad about missing people out and easier said than done, don't worry about what the others have to say about it.
CommentAuthorMrsSaraParry!
aaah I know this is going to happen to me!! I'm a teacher too and I've already warned them all that I can only invite a handful to the evening do. They all said 'oh its ok, we understand' but my colleagues are all quite bitchy, i just know that they'll be going on about it behind my back. Particularly because one of the people that will be invited is the headteacher, you just know there will be comments about sucking up etc...its really annoying!!! I'm just going to say sod them and invite who I want to, I suggest you do the same. You can't please everyone, and I dont know about you but I'm certainly not going to pay for people to come just to keep the peace xxx
CommentAuthorPennylane
I know Sara, I'm inviting the head teacher too, more out of politeness than actually wanting her there but the lady did give me a job after all! As for the rest, I think you're right about it - I'd rather suffer the bitchy comments than foot the bill for 40 more people! :)
02.07.11
All you need is Love!
Why is the rum always gone?
CommentAuthorMrsSaraParry!
Well exactly, and my lot would all expect to be allowed to bring their partners too, which we definitely cant afford and I'm not prepared to pay for! So instead I'm picking the 3 or 4 I really want there and am allowing them to bring partners. Besides the last thing I want is for that lot to all be sat there talking about school at my wedding, which you know they will! Teachers are incapable of talking about anything else when out socially :o) And also, I know that the 3 or 4 I am inviting also wouldnt want to be sat talking about school either, they're the ones that are different, they will actually want to have a good time and let their hair down xx
CommentAuthorMrsBroady2B
Stuff every one else hun. Invite whoever you want and if people b***h about you then the are just sad. If so many people work in a place, then surly not everyone can expect to be invite. There are so many pathetic people in this world.
CommentAuthorTinsel
I work in a school too. I am inviting my two 'best friends' in school to the day and then I was just going to invite people I like to the evening do (my school has about 100 staff members). Problem is, all the lovely office ladies keep asking how the planning is going and I feel like I should invite them, but at nearly £20 a head, I won't be able to :o(
Now, do I invite my Line Manager and the Head Teacher???
07.04.12 - the best day of my life!
Living happily ever after as Mrs Nottage x
CommentAuthorMrsSaraParry!
only if you want to :o)
CommentAuthorTinsel
Maybe just to the evening do... I hope they decline!
07.04.12 - the best day of my life!
Living happily ever after as Mrs Nottage x
CommentAuthorMrsSaraParry!
haha, i've just thought, I'm going to look like a right suck up! The people I'm inviting are are the head, the assistant head, and the two other young teachers. I bet the others will think I'm only inviting head and Assistant head to get brownie points ...
CommentAuthorlizfludder2b
I work with about 45 people althogethrr, so im not doing an open invite, they might see it as an opportunity to invite the OH's that could be another 90 people. my budget wont go that far. im sending out about 9 personal invites and then 2 seperate for my bosses.x.
CommentAuthormummybez
I'm not inviting my boss cos she's a cow and that's being polite lol. x
CommentAuthorlil miss sunshine
I. thinking of inviting my staff to the reception and as it is on a monday and late inthe afternoon they may not be able to make it (crafty i know) have also invited my area manager but then agian monday and 200miles from home so dont think he can make it (another craty move)......... but i'd say invite the ones closest to you and who vex let them eat cake.......lol
and now the next chapter
CommentAuthormym72
I think you should invite who you feel close to at work. I'm a Teaching Assistant in a high school with over 150 staff - but because we were based in faculties at one time I'm inviting the maths dept as I spend most of my week there. I'm also based in the learning support dept - but when I've organised Christmas nights out before only a few have turned up (the rest usually have a usually excuse). Because of this I'm only inviting about 4 or 5 from the learning support dept. I also talk to a couple of teachers who I support during the week (and chat to in the staffroom) so they're invited as well. Don't feel obliged to invite people just because they're in the same dept as you as it tends to get out of hand.
CommentAuthorLaticschick Holland
work invites............seem to be the hardest part lol. With my job i work in a office with over 30 people problem i've got is half i want and half u don;t. Plus people who i don't want are already asking if everyone from work is coming!
what to do?
CommentAuthorbecky -mrs firth
babe.... there is always gossipin like that!! dont worry! just give them out fi u dont want an open invite! btw u dont pay 4 transport for the nite guests anyway??
Engaged 27th November 2010
Hen Do Newcastle 2nd June 2012
Marrying the man of my dreams 11th August 2012!
Honeymoon To Jamaica 14th October 2012
CommentAuthorLiz3yy
I wouldn't worry about people say or think, you should only invite those who you want to be there, stuff the rest of them!
My boss has invited me to her wedding this summer, actually to the whole day which I wasn't expecting! when she bought her invites in she went about all rather cloak and dagger, as she was only inviting about 5 people in the office. She didn't want the rest of the staff to get the hump. Thing is though it's her wedding so her choice!
When I get married I intend to invite 3 people from work, people I consider friends as they have been either very helpful or just plain nice to me whilst I've been working there. The rest of them are good people but I just don't like them enough to fork out money on!
Can't wait until the day I become Mrs. Johnson :)
CommentAuthordizzydora4
i work in a call centre, so i have had a nightmare with this subject. I have managed to invite all of my skill set (20). So far only 4 have given rsvp's, one stropped because she couldnt bring her partner, and my boss is being a ***** because she wasnt invited(this is the woman who continually tries to put me down) I would'nt of bothered if i had known, but i just thought it would be a nice evening for them all. Hindsight is a wonderful thing eh. x
CommentAuthorsuzky123
im a teacher too and have the same issue as its expected normally to invite the whole science dept. I spoke to one teacher about this and they recommended NOT to invite the whole dept and just pick who you want as weddings are pricy enough and the others will deal with it. He said there will be some snidey comments but lukily two ppl are getting married this year and have not done blanket science. Yes there was a little bad mouthing but nothing that has gotten back to either of them and now the dept are accepting that not everyone needs inviting all of the time. Therefore I am just going to invite who I want but make sure that im not leaving out only one or two as this is abit mean in a dept of 16 ish x
cant wait to be Mrs Evans less than 3 weeks woooo
start weight 10st 1.5 lbs
weight now 8st 4.5 lbs
total loss to date: 24.5 lbs now need to maintain!
CommentAuthorTrish Goddard
I have not so much sent Invites out..... But i work as a Support Worker... we look after 5 Adults with Learning Disabilities, and they are all excited that Im getting married...
We have all appointments put in the Diary, So i have put it in the Diary for Sat 18th June 2011 that the staff that is on 4-11pm can bring all 5 down to my evening do for a couple of hours if they want to...... I know at least 3 of them will want to come down... but staff has to come with them to make sure they are fully supported! :)
CommentAuthorHonest John!
One thing is certain you cnat please everyone all the time. For our engagement party I invited a couple of peopel from work and thier partners. I work in a teaching environment, and did not want to invite everyone i work with, nor could we for space and numbers. Invite who you want to be there, its your day for yourself, too many people get caught up in the politics of who to invite and if great auntie dotty should be there, you decide who you wnat to be there.
