just a quick question does anyone else have the problem with there children being over imagative? my daughter can be playing in her bedroom and shout me to tell me the dogs have bit her (my dogs live outside and are not allowed in the place) i ask i dont think so bird where and she will bite her self and say see mammy or she will go and visit people and when i comeback she says they beat her shes only 2 but shes a funny child but after a while im now wondering and dreading her going to playgroup she went to stay at my mil2b her grannys and when i rang to see how she was she told me granny school beat me i said SCHOOL??? yes granny ose smak me and when i picked her she didnt mention it but my mil2b told me she said i also smacked her a the park???? not sure where shes getting it all from as i dont take her to the park shes never been to school nor have i mentioned school as im trying to get her into play school but havent yet but worryed shes going to get me in alot of trouble for this lol i have never hit my children but according to my daughter i have everybodys house she goes to when she comes back they have done something even if i was there the whole time it all includes biting punching smacking pulling hair headbutting and pinching? any ideas anyone
CommentAuthorkrisw86
normal children will make things up. my daughter makes things up, but has never said anyone has hit her. she's about to turn 3 as well. my worry is she may have seen it happen to someone very close and is trying express her concern over it. she seems confused by it herself. maybe ask the GP to refer for a child psychiatrist. they may give u a good insight as to whether this is normal behaviour xx
CommentAuthorjo Santa
I think immediately you need to quietly start watching and assessing to see if someone is hurting her. She may be threatened, and in turn try to be telling you in her own way. Go to a GP and express your concern - or speak to your health visitor. Get her into a social group - nursery, playgroup. Explain the issue as they can then keep and eye on her too, but it will also give her a channel for all that creativeness. If it's nothing, wonderful. If it the only way she knows how to tell you that someone (not the people she's accusing) is hurting her, then you need to deal with it.
Jo Santa
CommentAuthorAbi4tomboy
she doesn really see anybody she very occasionaly see her grannys or her 2 older cosians but with im always around shes 100% never been biten by a dog ever me and h2b have never had a fight so we do not hit each other shes never had any marks apart from the ones she does when i had son and midwife was around paying attention to her brother and not her she did headbutt the floor and stuff to get attention (attention seeking) she even tells me her brother punched her in mouth and hes only just sitting up so very unsure but her cosain used to to the same he told his school they were on the beach and his daddy drowned him and he died (but yet had never ever been to a beach only knew what one was as they were talking about it at playgroup) as we speak shes just come to me with some crisps out the cuboard and shes told me the cuboards naughty its spitting ????
CommentAuthorprincessnat1977
It sounds like she is attention seeking, when did it start, around the time you had your son? xxx
mainly yes she was allways a very upset if we ever had a vistor when they had to go she would bie them head butt the floor stand in frount of the door when they finaly went headbutt the door as it was closed but then when i had my son and moved shes carmed down people can now go home with out the tantrum but shes now telling me how they hurt her
CommentAuthorNailed
I hate to say this but I think you need to go to your GP and be entirely honest with him and he may suggest a visit to a child psychologist.
Hugs hun. Itll be okay.
Loux
Start Weight - 17stone 2lb (5/6/11)
CommentAuthorprincessnat1977
Ok, I think she is a normal child with a fab imagination that you need to harness. Try and get her into some group where you can go too, maybe a toddlers group so you can take your baby pop him in a bouncer and spend time with your daughter. Do you get much 1 to 1 time with her? I would explain the story about the boy who cried wolf to her and tell her that its not nice to tel fibs and when she does tell her its a fib make her sit on the naughty step. xxx
CommentAuthorjo Santa
Sorry - I didn't realise you'd got a younger one too. If it were me, I think you need to definitely get help - in the form of people who will take baby away for a couple of hours regularly so it's just you and her. Even when you have baby there, make sure you completely ignore him and cuddle her, telling her she's your special girl. If baby needs you in that time, make sure you don't hurry off to him and tell her "two more minutes, he's not hurting". You need to also make sure that she's got her own thing going on. I think playgroup or toddlers would be a good thing. Make sure she knows that whilst she's there YOU (don't say you and baby, are going to do the shopping or the ironing etc, so that she doesn't think you're leaving her to have fun with baby. Also start establishing routines where she's the eldest, so baby goes to bed before her etc. Don't make a fuss about it, just put the pecking order in line. And don't fuss her when she claims she's been hurt - still watch everything and everyone just incase - but as it seems unlikely it's real abuse, however much a pain of a butt it is, don't respond to her with a question or sympathy or even a conversation about it. Her "Charlie bit me" you "Let's get your bricks out". Change the subject and don't entertain the abuse conversation. Over time, if she keeps coming out with tales say to her (nicely) "I don't like you telling tales. I know that's not true because Charlie is asleep in his pram. If you want me to spend some time with you just come and say Mummy can we do something?" or however you talk to her. She will grow out of it, but it can feel like an eternity. Bear with it. She'll get to her teens and you'll realise this is only the beginning of years of new experiences the little darlings throw our way!! xx
Jo Santa
CommentAuthorkimmy
Does she play with other children?? I would speak to your HV or GP just to raise your concerns and get it logged!!!
CommentAuthorAbi4tomboy
yes shes starting play school september but probally only once a week as she doesnt get her funded space untill next year but i looked at expensie and thought it would be worth it to let her meet people in the village as we are new to the area yes her brother goes to bed at 7 and her at 9 so she has that time with me watching the soaps for me but also playing with her last night was plaghdough she doesnt really see anyone to play with but when she does she plays fine yesterday mixed well with people in the park and her dads promised to take her later while im cleaning up so she can have some her and daddy time if im 100% honest i know i shouldnt but im more doing everything with my daughter (maybe thats why) as my son needs picking up and with my arhtus i struggle as hes a heavy lad where as my daughter i can say come with mummy and she will so a shame for him but its more daddy does everthing lol her dad does say to her when she seys it really or are you telling lies she says yes daddy lies not real jokes :s
CommentAuthorlala "mod" bunni
monitor what she is seeing on the tv ..films etc .....it could be coming from that . you do need to get this sorted as if she is saying it about our children or staff at play group it could be serious for them ....it will also refelct on if she IS actually hurt by another child will you believe her
i know its late but she wakes around 10 times a night im not sure why but we watch cebeebies alday and her favorite film ifs alvin and the chimpunks which she has on in her bedroom she goes to bed earlyer if she doesnt have a sleep in the day which im trying to stop her but she goes to bed at 9 and doesnt wake till 8 same as her brother so if i put her to bed any earlyer shes up early so through my own choice if she has a sleep in the day i put her to bed at 9
CommentAuthorlala "mod" bunni
it might be best to try to get her to go to sleep with out the film going ......also if you can take to the park for a run around in the afternoon this will then help her sleep better
Sorry hunni i have to agree with lala about the time she goes to sleep, my 11 yr old goes to bed then.....my 8 yr old goes at 7.30 and my 1 yr old goes at 6.30 and they all wake up between 6.30 - 7 the next morning! Yes she gets up at 8 the next day which is great, so if she goes to bed earlier she might get up earlier but when she starts school you will have to be up earlier anyway! Don't let her go to sleep in the day but instead keep her busy with some drawing playdough etc and get her out to the park to let off some of that energy. I know it's hard with the little one too but its amazing what a few hours at the park can do with all that fresh air. Personally i wouldnt let her watch the soaps with you and feel this may be the cause of some of her behaviour, children pick up all sorts these days. Also have quite time an hour before bed where she can sit and have cuddles with you and watch her programnes, then when she goes to bed, she goes to bed (no playing, no films, nothing....just sleep).
I agree get her into a playgroup so she can let her imigination go wild but let them know the situation so they can keep an eye on her and go to the doc/hv and see what they can suggest! Fingers crossed it is just a phase but you need to be sure it's not something bigger!
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For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart
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CommentAuthorAbi4tomboy
i suffer with arthruts so i cant take her to the park or anything my h2b does all that as for getting up ealry for school she doesnt need to be up earlyer than 8 as im not sure but i dont think thats quite sleeping the day away i have to be up before the children to take medication so i can phscally get out of bed and on the hours i have to take them and the timing and gaps cannot take them before 7 else im having my night one to early so by 8 when the children are up i can get out of bed i spoke to my auntie whos a play school teacher and she said i wouldnt worry today at playgroup we had a shark attack us all and i had to get all the teeth out of the children and the one boy had a pet shark at home she said children get over excited and do say things but thats it
CommentAuthorkrisw86
abi, i would recommend getting one of the gina ford baby books. it will help with the sleep routine for her and for ur son. but i would think that u monitor closely and express concerns with ur gp. this is to cover ur own back as if she does it at nursery, and one of the workers doesnt know the situation, they have a duty to report such things to social services. social will check with gp to see if it is just the over imagination and u have expressed concerns over it. the gp may suggest the child psychologist could help, as they will watch her and be able to get to the true cause of why she is saying these things. hope it gets sorted tho hun xx
CommentAuthorAbi4tomboy
i think like you said ill make an appinment with either gp or healt vistor and just let them know but will book it ofr next week as we are super busy this week with the weddig
CommentAuthorjanetx71
hun i think maybe this is just her way of saying she wants more of your attention i mean its a lot for a little one to take in what with a new baby and now the wedding i wouldnt worry to much by all means get her checked but i hardly think its time for panic mode just yet enjoy your day hun xxxx
CommentAuthorAbi4tomboy
thanks janet shes very imangitive in all ways she will roll paper up and pretend its a microphone and sing in it she will use toilet roll as a blanket for her peppa pig figure and tuck them into bed shes very cleaver girl
CommentAuthorMrs.Caz.Lewis
edited
she could be wanting more attention, and i dont want to suggest it but have you maybe thought of adhd or autism or schizophrenia or anything with her banging her head? i dont want to upset you hun at all but seems extreme her saying all this about being abused and harming herself, could there be somewhere shes picking it up from or perhaps watchin unsuitable tv? i agree she should maybe go to bed an hr or so earlier as 9pm is quite late for a 2 yr old. rays son when we got to see him was coming up to 3 and he still went to bed at 7.30ish, they need as much sleep as they can get. really suggest going to see GP and seeing about any tests that can be done to see if she has adhd or anything, seems peculiar for a 2 year old to smack her head against a door or wall etc. sit her down and say that what she says can get people into alot of trouble and monitor her closely, as playgroup and family to do the same and if she still says things are happening perhaps ask for a videotape to be round at all times to prove that nothings happening, im sure if they got nothing to hide people wont mind?
good luck x x x
CommentAuthorAbi4tomboy
we always said she had adhd as it runs in my partners family and we always call her little ___ (and the boys name who has it) that has been from no age when she would headbutt walls ect but i think i will make an appoinment to see the health vistor and tell her
CommentAuthorMrs.Caz.Lewis
well good luck hun and again sorry for suggesting it but ive worked with children with disabilities and they did similar things, keep us posted x x x
