When we first got engaged in March 2010 originally my H2B asked his then best friend to be his bestman, but then everything went wrong as the bm upset a lot of people by cheating on his missus who is also a friend and moving in with this new girl who was 15 years younger than him, an alcoholic and a druggy.
A lot of our friends were treated pretty badly by him and my H2B and I are some of the few he is still on speaking terms with.
The fact is we had all decided he was going through a mid-life crisis as he pretty much had been acting like a teenage boy for a while, buying a motorbike, having an affair with a 23 year old (he was 38 at the time) and going out clubbing every night. Since then though the new gf got pregnant (I found out from her best friend that she did this on purpose shortly after they got together to stop him leaving her) and he now looks after their little boy when he is not working as she is always round at her friends in a state.
He is no longer best man (a really plausible reason was given and he was fine with it), the thing is he was our friend for a long time and we really want him at our wedding. We have checked with our other friends and they are okay with him being there as long as his girlfriend is not and well we do not want her there as she is a nightmare.
As we had already invited him previously and do not know his address we were going to invite him just over fbook, but we really do not know how to word it so he knows she is not invited and well have been wimping out for the last few months :(
CommentAuthorWhovianbride
Im planning on just putting the names of tho's invited and with thos with bf/gf who we are not inviting putting a little slip in saying we are sorry but due to budget are unable to invite any plus ones
Met June 2009 on my Birthday,Met again July 2009 and got
together, May 2010 Moved in,Jan 2011 got pregnant,
August 2011 Got our own place, 2011 Had our Baby Girl,
Dec 2011 Got engaged, July 2015 Getting married! Yay!
CommentAuthorThe-Future-Mrs-B
I like lana2bemrshands idea, it's simple without offending.
CommentAuthorbrilly
I agree with Lana's idea of mentioning budgets tight and unfortunately you cant afford to have her there x
31st August 2013 I became Mrs Carrick
Cant wait to do it all over again in 2018
CommentAuthorsarah
edited
He'll know why she isn't invited, I wouldn't make up any excuses about it. In most cases the note would be appreciated, but in this case I don't think it would go over well. I'd find out what his address and send him an invite with only his name on. It's then his choice to come or not.
Were just going to be putting names on the invites to make it clear x
CommentAuthorHappyBunny
If you h2b and him are still friends could he not have a quiet word with him?xx
CommentAuthorValentinaK
If you're friends with him, you could just be honest and say face to face and just tactfully put it that you're tight on numbers and as you don't really know his gf that well, you're inviting him as a stag guest for his friendship that you value. You could mention that it may cause friction on your special day bringing along his gf that along with his behaviour caused so much upset with your other friends and I expect, guests that will be there therefore, for keeping the pace you are not inviting his gf. If he doesn't like it, he may not come but if he is a good friend, he will understand and its up to him to deal with the gf if she kicks off.
