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  1.  
    • MrsC2bee
      CommentAuthorMrsC2bee
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I'm really struggling with my In laws ATM!! Its like they just don't care and aren't bothered about anything that's to do with the wedding! Even though I've asked if their kids would like to be part!! I know a lot of it is jealousy as my sil is engaged but not looking at marriage soon but why have they got to be so negative and horrible!! All the do it bitch and I just feel like whatever I say or show them they will slag off when I'm not there. To point I went to look at dresses today n my mil didn't even ask or make conversation when I bought it up and just made me feel crap. Just feel like saying if you can't be happy for us then don't bother coming!! Think I'm more angry as my oh been married before and they were very involved that time and excited but this time they just cba!! I don't know why I let it get to me but think were I don't have a sister to turn to and talk about with it I thought they'd understand but they are just so negative n bitchy it really annoys and upsets me :( how do you girls cope with Inlaws like this and should I be asking my oh to be having a word with them and see what their problem is???
  2.  
    • KirstyR386
      CommentAuthorKirstyR386
      Is poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I don't know what to say but didn't want to read and run. That sounds terrible though. What does your oh think of their behaviour? I think he needs to have a word with them. If they can't be happy for you both and except his decision to be with you then they should shut up and put up. X
  3.  
    • CatherineR
      CommentAuthorCatherineR
      Is poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Your in laws will come round eventually, my family took a while but like you, I had a long time until I got married so their interest was limited. Now that we are only 5 months away, there's a lot of excitement circulating, everyone is asking and planning for the day :) I know it's horrible but for now, surround yourself with the people that do care and are interested so it doesn't upset you so much. When the day gets closer, they'll start to get interested! X

    Members signature icon
    Married my wife on 15.08.15
    Honeymooned on the Isles of Scilly :)

  4.  
    • *The NewMrsMalin*
      CommentAuthor*The NewMrsMalin*
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    I'm sure they'll come around; my parents were excited but when I started planning it two years ago they were like it's ages away yet when it hit the year mark; they got really excited.

    Hope it gets sorted; maybe ask your oh to have a word with them :)

    Members signature icon
    Met in 2009
    Got together on12th May 2011, proposed on the 12th May 2013
    When you get knocked down; smile and pick yourself up again!
    Fight for what you believe in!
  5.  
    • VictoriaL46
      CommentAuthorVictoriaL46
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
      edited
     
    Others will not necessarily be as excited as you are at this time and this can sometimes be taken as disinterest. As you pointed out your OH has been married before and they were really involved in that. A lot of love goes into helping out a wedding and to then see the marriage end can leave a bitter taste in a family that they don't feel they can fully invest themselves into a second wedding and instead would rather the bride and groom enjoy building it themselves. Then again I don't know the family so I may be way off in which case have your OH have a word with them.

    You also still have 16 months until your wedding so they may come around and start getting excited when it's closer to the time.

    Members signature icon
    Met in Nov 2005
    Engaged 13th June 2013
    Becomes Mrs Stewart on 10th Aug 2015 Honeymoon in Florida!
    My Diary Thread: My Alice in Wonderland Wedding Diary
  6.  
    • Myranny
      CommentAuthorMyranny
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
      edited
     
    I get this at the moment - no one is as excited as me, not even the groom. But I love planning, countdowns, spreadsheets... all that stuff. My OWN mother keeps nodding at me and saying "Yes dear, but you've got a LONG time yet." Thankfully I don't have any in-laws because I can be seriously intolerant of other people's bs.

    I wouldn't let it get to you at the moment. Don't even talk to them about it if they're not interested, and you might find them asking questions. Also, do you have the same problem as me where you've got a long time to go but weddings is ALL you talk about? I find I have to make myself speak about other stuff because the people around me are getting fed up.

    If they are still like this 6 months before the wedding then they are clearly a bunch of d**ks but they might be the sort of people, like my OH, that can't get excited about something until it's almost happening right in front of them. And just always keep in mind that almost no one is ever as excited as the bride xx
  7.  
    • lala "mod" bunni
      CommentAuthorlala "mod" bunni
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    tips on how to deal with them

    DONT show them anything
    DONT tell them anything

  8.  
    • Glitterfairy
      CommentAuthorGlitterfairy
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    I agree with lala, just get on with your wedding planning and don't tell them anything. Their loss.

    Members signature icon
    Our wedding day - 6 October 2012


  9.  
    • Emmilou82
      CommentAuthorEmmilou82
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
      edited
     
    Sorry to hear your In Laws are being like this..... My mum is very similar and has no interest and is very negative to anything I show her.

    I agree with IaIa, don't show or tell them anything, I don't and it saves any disappointment

    Members signature icon
    Marrying 'The One' on 30th July 2016
    I am now Mrs Emma Stokoe xx

  10.  
    • DonnaH39
      CommentAuthorDonnaH39
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    Yeah, I'm on the just don't tell them anything wagon. If you don't tell them then they can't be disinterested or negative about it




  11.  
    • MrsC2bee
      CommentAuthorMrsC2bee
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Thanks ladies :)
    Oh annoyed with how they are acting as its like they are jealous and they are just being rude. But the subject of the wedding did come up today and surprisingly they talked about the bridesmaids dresses and asked about the food and evening stuff but then they ask the price n sort of look shocked because its in the thousands but tbh there certain things I don't want to scrimp on as its what we want and we are only planning on doing it once. I had good rant to my moh and think I'll keep wedding talk between us and on here for a while lol. I keep forgetting its til 16months away as trying to get everything in place now lol. X
  12.  
    • Emmilou82
      CommentAuthorEmmilou82
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    I think that's the main problem isn't it..... Other people just see how far away it is and yet we are so excited at planning they just don't get it....
    I got a brilliant one off my mum yesterday, 'well, anything can happen between now and then' basically implying we might not be together!!! How rude!!

    Members signature icon
    Marrying 'The One' on 30th July 2016
    I am now Mrs Emma Stokoe xx

  13.  
    • CatherineR
      CommentAuthorCatherineR
      Is poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Better than what me granddad did to my mum when she married my dad - as they were arriving at the church, he said to here 'are you sure? We could still turn back!' whichwas no doubt his way of making a joke but they have their pearl wedding anniversary next so they showed him! Don't listen to her :)

    Members signature icon
    Married my wife on 15.08.15
    Honeymooned on the Isles of Scilly :)

  14.  
    • ElizabethF49
      CommentAuthorElizabethF49
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    My in laws don't ask about the wedding at all, it used to upset me now I just don't let it bother me, I'm marrying the man of my dreams (aren't we all) and if they cant be happy for us then that's their issue. My oh sees nothing wrong with their behaviour (due to the way he has been brought up) so rather than let it come between us I just don't care. We didn't get a card from his mum at the engagement party never mind a congratulations, she walked outside to have a cig just before our speech, my mum was livid I just shrugged it off they have no manners, its them that's missing out.

    Members signature icon
    After 7 years and 11 months he proposed to me 18.10.13
    Our son is 5 years old and our world
    Getting married 15.08.15.
    Life hasnt been easy but we have each other :)
  15.  
    • Mrs T Hurley!
      CommentAuthorMrs T Hurley!
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Like Lala said don't say anything about it. Give them a bit of reverse psychology!

    Members signature icon
    Met 18/09/03
    Engaged 06/09/08
    Getting married 05/09/17
  16.  
    • TheFutureMrsK
      CommentAuthorTheFutureMrsK
      Is poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I'm sorry to hear they're being like that :( as everyone else has said maybe they'll be more excited nearer to the time. You said your OH has been married before and they were involved then. Perhaps they gave a lot of time and money then and you also said your SIL is engaged as well so maybe they're saving money for her wedding too. It doesn't justify their behaviour but maybe thats why they're not as enthusiastic just now.

    “Love, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage.”
    -Ambrose Bierce

  17.  
    • ElizabethF49
      CommentAuthorElizabethF49
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Meant to also say because they don't ask anything about the wedding we don't offer any information if they ask we will answer though. My in laws have rooms booked at the venue for the night before nd of the wedding bit haven't told us this (not that they need to)

    Members signature icon
    After 7 years and 11 months he proposed to me 18.10.13
    Our son is 5 years old and our world
    Getting married 15.08.15.
    Life hasnt been easy but we have each other :)
  18.  
    • michgib
      CommentAuthormichgib
      Is poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Love lalas advice, but I think you should have a word with oh and ask him to speak to them and let them know how upset they are making you. big hug sent to you
  19.  
    • Teresa
      CommentAuthorTeresa
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I agree with Lala, just talk about it with people that are interested unless they ask then if you feel like telling them you can if not, just say not sure about that at the mo!
 

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