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  1.  
    • VictoriaL46
      CommentAuthorVictoriaL46
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
      edited
     
    A good chunk of my family aren't invited to the wedding and a cousin who is within that chunk that I haven't spoken to in over a decade suddenly sent me a FB message today saying literally "I didn't know you were getting married! Lol". Now I know how they found out. My sister posted about getting my niece a dress for the wedding today and they're friends on FB. My issue is, is that his Dad is close to my mother and as such is not part of my life due to a huge thing that happened when I turned 18 that resulted in me being homeless and I do not want her knowing any information about the day if it can be helped.

    How do I respond to this message? I don't want be be ignorant but we never really had much of a relationship even though we lived on the same street for nearly 7 years and he will not be getting invite.

    Members signature icon
    Met in Nov 2005
    Engaged 13th June 2013
    Becomes Mrs Stewart on 10th Aug 2015 Honeymoon in Florida!
    My Diary Thread: My Alice in Wonderland Wedding Diary
  2.  
    • ElizabethF49
      CommentAuthorElizabethF49
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    Not sure im reading this right but is it your mum you don't want to find out any information or your cousin? (I think its your mum)

    If it was me personally I would either just ignore the message or simply reply yes i'm getting married next year

    Members signature icon
    After 7 years and 11 months he proposed to me 18.10.13
    Our son is 5 years old and our world
    Getting married 15.08.15.
    Life hasnt been easy but we have each other :)
  3.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
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    I was going to post exactly what Elizabeth did xx

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  4.  
    • VictoriaL46
      CommentAuthorVictoriaL46
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    Both. To go into detail about what happened 11 years ago would take an age but let's just say no mother would do to her kids what mine did to me. Took me a long time to get away from that darkness in my life and she had disappeared for a while but has come back to Scotland after my grandmothers death. Occasionally she'll FB message some abuse but I never respond. She is close with my uncle and his family (inc my cousin) and I know if he knew the date/location within hours my mother would know. And my worst fear would be for her to turn up on the day.

    Members signature icon
    Met in Nov 2005
    Engaged 13th June 2013
    Becomes Mrs Stewart on 10th Aug 2015 Honeymoon in Florida!
    My Diary Thread: My Alice in Wonderland Wedding Diary
  5.  
    • ElizabethF49
      CommentAuthorElizabethF49
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    if you feel its going to cause you so much stress the best thing to do would be to just ignore his message and tell him nothing xx

    Members signature icon
    After 7 years and 11 months he proposed to me 18.10.13
    Our son is 5 years old and our world
    Getting married 15.08.15.
    Life hasnt been easy but we have each other :)
  6.  
    • InDreamland
      CommentAuthorInDreamland
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Ah right, yes I agree with Elizabeth (again) x

    Members signature icon
    Married the love of my life on Saturday 11th May 2013 xxx
    Had our dream perfect honeymoon in Hawaii!

  7.  
    • VictoriaL46
      CommentAuthorVictoriaL46
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    Thanks ladies. Really appreciate it. X

    Members signature icon
    Met in Nov 2005
    Engaged 13th June 2013
    Becomes Mrs Stewart on 10th Aug 2015 Honeymoon in Florida!
    My Diary Thread: My Alice in Wonderland Wedding Diary
  8.  
    • Elinor Claire
      CommentAuthorElinor Claire
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    I'd agree with Elizabeth too. You could possibly get away with saying yes I'm getting married but it's only a small wedding, and hopefully that might negate any talk from him about whether or not he is invited. Then have a quiet word with those who do know the details to be careful what they put on Facebook.

    Members signature icon
    30th August 2014 was the best birthday ever.
    It was the day that I became Mrs. Dixon.

  9.  
    • AndreaE20
      CommentAuthorAndreaE20
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Id just say yes Iam and leave it at that

    Members signature icon
    Future Mrs Ryan
    First Date 4th July 2009
    Asked me to be his wife 6th Augest 2014
    Hoping to be his wife on 4th July 2017
  10.  
    • VictoriaL46
      CommentAuthorVictoriaL46
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Pretty much responded with that Andrea. I don't think they will respond but will have to wait and see.

    Members signature icon
    Met in Nov 2005
    Engaged 13th June 2013
    Becomes Mrs Stewart on 10th Aug 2015 Honeymoon in Florida!
    My Diary Thread: My Alice in Wonderland Wedding Diary
  11.  
    • AndreaE20
      CommentAuthorAndreaE20
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    well fingers crossed they dont but if they do jsut say sorry guest list already set

    Members signature icon
    Future Mrs Ryan
    First Date 4th July 2009
    Asked me to be his wife 6th Augest 2014
    Hoping to be his wife on 4th July 2017
  12.  
    • MrsRMalone2b
      CommentAuthorMrsRMalone2b
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    I agree with the others, say nothing. Also ask your sister not to post anything until after the wedding. As for your mums messages, you can block her permanently on fb so she can't message you or see any posts, no matter who reports them xxx

    Members signature icon



  13.  
    • Whovianbride
      CommentAuthorWhovianbride
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    What did your sister day exactly, if she mentioned bridesmaid dresses etc but not specifically you, just say no and ask her to back to up. As else it could of been for anyone's wedding.

    Members signature icon
    Met June 2009 on my Birthday,Met again July 2009 and got
    together, May 2010 Moved in,Jan 2011 got pregnant,
    August 2011 Got our own place, 2011 Had our Baby Girl,
    Dec 2011 Got engaged, July 2015 Getting married! Yay!
  14.  
    • VictoriaL46
      CommentAuthorVictoriaL46
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    "Got Emily's dress for my sisters wedding sorted" she only has one sister which is yours truly. My sister has already been told she's not allowed to post the date since she still communicates with one or two from that part of the family. Like me she has nothing to do with my uncle and feels the same about our mother as I do. I have replied and simply said yes I am. All they've come back with so far is "holy **** lol"

    Members signature icon
    Met in Nov 2005
    Engaged 13th June 2013
    Becomes Mrs Stewart on 10th Aug 2015 Honeymoon in Florida!
    My Diary Thread: My Alice in Wonderland Wedding Diary
  15.  
    • TanyaS78
      CommentAuthorTanyaS78
      Just marriedBadgeBadge
     
    I am having the same concern with my family too at the moment! I have just asked my BMs and others not to put anything on facebook about the wedding yet.
  16.  
    • Salyane72
      CommentAuthorSalyane72
      Is poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadge
     
    Some good advice from the ladies there I feel :)
    Just have conversation with sister & family reiterating no dates / location & stick to either ignoring messages or yes/no replies.
    Unfortunately if your mum & uncle want to find out they may but you've been strong until know so stay positive.
  17.  
    • VictoriaL46
      CommentAuthorVictoriaL46
      Ticker backgroundIs poweruserJust marriedBadgeBadgeTicker foreground
     
    Yeah Salyane, I have a feeling she will find out eventually and if/when she does I will just have to deal with it when that time comes.

    Members signature icon
    Met in Nov 2005
    Engaged 13th June 2013
    Becomes Mrs Stewart on 10th Aug 2015 Honeymoon in Florida!
    My Diary Thread: My Alice in Wonderland Wedding Diary
 

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