All my bridesmaid's are pretty tall, well they are either taller than me or around the same height as me. My sister is alot taller and I've told her she has to wear flat shoes, she's fine with that as she's recently broken her pelvis and doesn't see herself in high heels ever again! But the other bridesmaid's aren't so open to the idea, they want heels. My youngest bridesmaid is 14 and she's literally out her foot down and had a major strop, she thinks she'll look like a little kid in flat heels. Thing is, the dresses are floor length and you'll hardly see the shoes! It's getting a bit out of hand and I don't know what to do.. Just say it's flat shoes or bugger off? Or let them have what they want?
All of my dreams come true the day I married you, Mr Walker
5.11.11
Remember Remember The 5th of November
CommentAuthorXLittleMissMe!X
I would tell the 14 year old that if she wants to be an adult then she has to act like one and having a strop isn't the kind of things an adult should be doing. Tell her that if the adults can wear flats and not look like a kid then so can she. If she doesn't like it then she can always be a guest.
I really can't see why they should be having such a problem over shoes and that they should be a little more grateful as its not like you are wanting to put them in anything awful or uncomfy.
CommentAuthorKye
What if you compramised and said they wear flat shoes in the daytime for the wedding and piccies etc then at the reception in the evening, when all the important pics have been taken and you've gotten married,they can wear them then if they really want too xxxx
CommentAuthorlinzi
i would go with the flat heels or ***** off option myself. If you cant see the shoes under the dress, then I dont see what the problem is. And if they did have heels on, they would be kicking them off after the first dance anyway cause their feet will be killing them by then.
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CommentAuthorHappilymarried Mrs G
Kyes is a good idea, they can wear what shoes they want after the wedding..... or you could put your foot down, use your sisters pelvis as an excuse so to speak why she cant wear heels and you want all your bridemaids matching. x
The flat shoes I'm looking at are flat pumps but they are very pretty and in the same colour as the bridesmaid dresses.. I'd happily wear them. The 14 year old wants her nails done spray tan the lot and shes expecting me to pay for everything, she wants to look grown up :-/ I'm not happy about it. I don't mind if they want to wear high heels on the evening but when stood near me I dont want to look a midget, Stephen is quite short too! But I always take heels off whilst dancing, I've got myself some roll up pumps to put on for dancing. I don't really see a compromise being an option, its either my way or there way
All of my dreams come true the day I married you, Mr Walker
5.11.11
Remember Remember The 5th of November
CommentAuthorx ashlil x
i would tell her tough she is wearing flat shoes!! x
CommentAuthorStevie_Dee
I certainly wouldnt be putting up with a 14 year old having a strop. At 14 to me she is a kid! Best way forward is either put your foot down say heels or nothing!....or do what Kye suggests with 2 pairs of shoes, or maybe compromise slightly by getting a shoe with the tiniest of heels. Definately dont let them take over tho and tell you want they want its your day! xxx
I have a gorgeous husband!
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in Cornwall. Happiest woman ever!
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CommentAuthorKye
Then your way it is!! Its YOUR wedding day your asking them to wear flat shoes for one day, is not too much to ask! I think its scary that a 14yr old wants the works with spray tan, nails etc id say to her its really exoensive getting married and all these things ud like to have done we just cant afford, you will still feel grown up with wearing the dress and looking nice for the day. Its a hard one hun but id put my foot down if i were you and id leave her to sulk xxx
CommentAuthorXLittleMissMe!X
I think you need to bring the 14 year old into the real world when it comes to being grown up. Spray tans, nails and heels do not make you an adult. The way she is behaving is that of a child which is the exact opposite of what she wants to be. Tell her that the adults are not having it done so why the hell should she?
They are called maids for a reason. They are there to help you out on your day not to try and outshine the bride with their heels and nails.
CommentAuthorStevie_Dee
What!!! If she wants her nails done, spray tan etc. let her or her parents pay for it. Its not your place to provide their beuaty treatments. If you are paying for dress/shoes thats more than enough. You've asked her to be your bridesmaid, not Britains next top model! xxx
I have a gorgeous husband!
2 brilliant wonderful boys, a wonderful life
in Cornwall. Happiest woman ever!
Now making our house a home. Blessing 2014.
CommentAuthorStave
Put your foot down in the flats! :-0
But then again I am abit obsessive with shoes! I have put a pic up in my album -shoes. When I asked my bridesmaids, I told them to look at the photo called "Whats wrong with this photo?" as it is what "I didnt want". Everyone to thier own but for me the shoes have to match.
I hope that things get sorted. Maybe have a word with the mum of the 14 year old, coz if she is demanding before hand you dont want her being demanding on the day!
Good luck :-)
CommentAuthorbecky -mrs firth
mrs melody i wudnt do pumps! i wud do sandals, wiv dangley things on! i just got a ncie pair from river island wiv butterflys on!
Engaged 27th November 2010
Hen Do Newcastle 2nd June 2012
Marrying the man of my dreams 11th August 2012!
Honeymoon To Jamaica 14th October 2012
CommentAuthorMrsMelodyWalker
My wedding is in November Becky, I can be mean but not that mean. I don't want there feet dropping off due to frost bite.
I've txt her mum and said when your out and about look for a pair of flat pumps in a colour similar to the bridesmaid dresses, she txt back saying Shauna want's heels and I replied saying well she has to wear flat's or she can be a guest and wear whatever height heel she likes!
I txt the other bridesmaids saying I want them to wear flat's but I will be nice and let them have pumps instead of flip flops or sandals lol OR if I can find a very small kitten heel shoe they can wear them.. waiting for responses
All of my dreams come true the day I married you, Mr Walker
5.11.11
Remember Remember The 5th of November
CommentAuthorbecky -mrs firth
awww mrs m!!! sum kushis !! perfect and cheap and beaded ( cant spell them asain shoes)
Engaged 27th November 2010
Hen Do Newcastle 2nd June 2012
Marrying the man of my dreams 11th August 2012!
Honeymoon To Jamaica 14th October 2012
CommentAuthorHappilymarried Mrs G
I am putting my bridemaids in ballet pumps as well. I think they are elegant pretty and they match..... grown up enough for the 16 yr old, yet not too grown up for the 10 yr old or the 4 yr old.
CommentAuthorCroc
am i being thick here or do i not understand.... is it just the 14 yr old you have problems with with heel or all the bridesmaids in heels because they are tall????
"better a witty fool, than a foolish wit" shakespeare
CommentAuthorMrsMelodyWalker
The main thing is the 14 year old, she wants mega heels but I'm not a huge fan of the others being in heels because they will all be much taller than me. I suppose that's a bit selfish
All of my dreams come true the day I married you, Mr Walker
5.11.11
Remember Remember The 5th of November
CommentAuthorKye
Yeah it is but you are supposed to be its YOUR wedding day!!xx
CommentAuthorbecky -mrs firth
tell her she can change into heels after piccies?
Engaged 27th November 2010
Hen Do Newcastle 2nd June 2012
Marrying the man of my dreams 11th August 2012!
Honeymoon To Jamaica 14th October 2012
CommentAuthorStave
Just wonderd, how is the 14 year old related to you? x
CommentAuthorMrsMelodyWalker
I said I'm fine with her wearing heels after the actual ceremony and pictures, I've told them all that but she wants to wear heels all day and the other girls were hoping to wear heels too..
Oh I dunno. Maybe I should just let them wear heels. I've found a paid that aren't mega high so it may be alright..
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All of my dreams come true the day I married you, Mr Walker
5.11.11
Remember Remember The 5th of November
CommentAuthorMrsMelodyWalker
Jaesin, she's my best friends daughter and my God daughter x
All of my dreams come true the day I married you, Mr Walker
5.11.11
Remember Remember The 5th of November
CommentAuthorXLittleMissMe!X
I don't think it would kill them to wear them all day and like you have said you really are bothered about the photos so just to wear them for a couple of hours is no big deal. To start kicking up over a pair of shoes is silly of them. Its not like you are asking them to do something major.
CommentAuthorCroc
as a tall bird (6ft 2 in my highest heel i own 5ft 10 and a bit flat footed) ... and no offence meant id be pretty miffed if someone asked me not to wear heels just because i would be taller than them... i think id be really upset in fairness as i generally always wear heels ... espec in dresses and to weddings and as my mates bm i wore heels and shes 5ft 5!! etc etc
thats just my opinion as a tall bird thou
why dont you compromise with the 14 yr old and get her some small ish heels ... nothing like a 4 inch but something more grown up than flats...as shes at that difficult age where there not quite a kid but in 2 yrs time old enough to join the army as an apprentice and move out of home.... i know what my sisters were like at 14 (ones 17 now and ones 21 and am 10 yrs plus them so im like mum 2 to them and was easier to compromise at that age)
like i say just my opinion dont hate me lol
"better a witty fool, than a foolish wit" shakespeare
CommentAuthorKye
Hun if your going to feel uncomfortable with the piccies them being taller and just in general then dont give in to it, the pictures are the memories you have of the day and ure the one looking at them for the rest of ur life not them i dont want u to be looking at them thinking i look silly being smaller and just regretting it, then as horrible as it is to tell a best friends daughter no, i would xxx
CommentAuthorStave
I dont know how to put pics up in a thread, so I will put them up in an album. It is of my sisters wedding. I have shown these to potential photographers and said "I dont want this". So I know what you mean about being shorter. I have a short complex as my other half is over 6.5ft. If you do end up going with the heels etc, just make sure that your photographer is aware of it and then they can be more creative with the positioning of people. x
CommentAuthorMrsMelodyWalker
Just had a look.. No No No No way am I putting them in heels!
All of my dreams come true the day I married you, Mr Walker
5.11.11
Remember Remember The 5th of November
CommentAuthorMrsd
The bm should wear what ever you ask them too, my daughter is 14 so do know the problems they cause...she refused to wear any of the dresses i picked so in end i yelled at her she can be a guest and wear what ever she wanted...she soon bucked her ideas up and hasnt argued with me about anything since. xx
CommentAuthorStave
LOL - we all laugh about them photos sooooooo much, but to me, it was the photographer that should have been more aware of the lines! hahahahahahaha.
The very tall blonde one is my cousin, we all had kitten heels on but she decided to change to killer heeled wedges. We lasted in ours all day but she ended up taking hers off and going bare foot (one thing I CANT stand).
I am having the same debate at the mo with mine. My bridesmaids go from a size 6 to a size 22 and the wideness of the feet and the "balanceability" in heels is varied too. Dont want waddling ducks walking up the aisle, so I am thinking about ballet type pumps or wedges or something with a wide stable heel.
The things that you dont realise you have to worry about eh? x
CommentAuthorLisa Ramos
I don't see this being any different to her refusing to wear a dress you have picked, you want them to wear flats so they wear flats end of.
