So....My dad is not my bio dad...but has been my 'dad' since I was two. I call him dad, always known him as dad, and my 'sperm donor' has not been in contact since i was born. Everyone in the family knows...I dont honestly think it is something to be ashamed of.
My dad has written two speeches, one mentioning when I came into his life at the age of two and one avoiding the subject. My mum has heard them both and wants to know whether I mind dad mentioning it or not.
Straightaway, I said I had no problem with dad mentioning it.....but......now I am thinking of non-family members who unless told would of just assumed he was my bio dad. If it was mentioned do you reckon the evening do would be filled with gossip and questions? so now i am undecided????
Help!!!
Oh he is obviously walking me down the aisle - cant wait!!!!.....9 days to go!!!!!....not that Im excited!!!!!!!
xx
CommentAuthorJill
aww I dont think it'd be the hot topic, a few friends may be surprised but in more of a 'oooh she never mentioned that' than a 'ooooh how juicy is that gossip'.... gossips only hot when someones trying to keep it a big secret and you're obviously not. I'm sure either will be lovely, it's about what he's more comfortable doing. I know my dad - who adopted me when he married to my mum - wont include it because to him I am his always have been so I doubt very much he'll include that but I do think that it's lovely of your dad to recognise that life changing part of his life when he gained a daughter :) x
29th September 2012
Cant wait to be Mrs D!
CommentAuthorSparklez
I agree with jill on this one! If your not sure tho just sit down with your dad and ask him not to mention it during the speech im sure from what you've said he won't mind missing that minor detail out :) Good luck on the day I hope its magical for you x
You don't marry someone you can live with -
You marry the person you cannot live without..
CommentAuthormadhen
I really wouldn't worry about what other people will think about it. If you're happy for it to be mentioned then that's the main thing, and as Jill says, it's nice that he speaks about the day he gained a daughter. Maybe one or two guests might be surprised, but realistically, they're there to celebrate your special day and nobody's going to make an issue of it :)
CommentAuthorHalebob85
I agree with Madhen. It was a signigicant part of his and your life and what lead to him giving this speech. If you're happy with it. Acknowledge it.
Met August 2003
Started planning 2012
Getting married 29th June 2014
I think the only people who matter in this are you and your Dad so do what feels comfortable and natural for you .Strangely my situation is identical as in my Dad adopted me when i was two and my biological Dad never featured at all.This is where we differ though because although everyone in my immediate family knows (although its never talked about) my children and wider family have no idea and that is how i want it to stay.As far as i am concerned he is my Dad and i don't want ancient history colouring that view for anyone( most of all my children as i would hate for them to feel he wasn't their proper grandad) Also i would hate anyone thinking or referring to my brother and sister as half sister/brother as again they to me are not half anything,that would really upset me.So i would prefer people to remain ignorant. But it sounds like you and your family have always been open about it so its up to you,personally i would only ever have admiration for someone who has brought up 'someone elses child as there own'.I think if guests talked about it it would be with respect for this not as gossip.I know that i love my Dad more because he is not my biological Dad and i think you do too .It will be very special having them walk us down the aisle in their rightfull role as Dads (oh 'm filling up now!) Whatever you decide will be right,have a wonderful day xxxx
CommentAuthorvicz2000
poulton bride - you have just made me cry, lol
thank you all for your advice im gonna sit down with my dad and see what he wants to say and go from there.